Becoming Published - What You SHOULD Be Using
YOU! Yes, you! I can see you right there sitting and thinking to yourself, "How can I also be in the Neopian Times?" Well, you may not have been thinking that before reading that thought but you are now. I could tell you just how you can do that right here, right now, but that would be too easy. If you have past editions of the Neopian Times rotting in your cupboards I'm sure one of them will tell you how to find your writing on these pages. However, I can give you a small hint: inspiration is the key!
What better way is there to be inspired but by the Neopian Times itself? If you keep the following objects around your Neohome as you're writing, there'll be no doubt about finding yourself in here. To test this out, I took my own advice and my name is in print.
Neopian Times Notebook
This should be clear. If you're going to start writing for the Neopian Times what better place than their very own notebook? Even if the editor doesn't approve of your written piece, you'll still have it on what looks like pages of the Times itself. Nobody needs to know if you don't get in...
The slogan they're using to market this fine piece of stationery is inspiring!
'The perfect place for budding journalists to write down their first articles.'
Once your very first submission is published, I guarantee there will be people squabbling over this notebook with your very first ideas. I used this notebook to brainstorm my own ideas for an article and here I am. It may be a little more expensive than some other notebooks with an estimated value of 2218 NP, but for the Neopian Times no expense must be spared!
Perfect? Very much so!
Neopian Times Quill
Now that you have the perfect notebook to write your very first article, you most definitely need a pen.... Or perhaps a quill? With this official Neopian Times quill, you can feel like a professional journalist. Although your hand may hurt after the first one thousand words, this quill will inspire you to keep going until you've written the perfect piece for the Neopian Times. The marketing slogan hides the fact that you should use this quill if you would like to be published, stating:
'Why write with a boring pen when you can use a quill?'
Despite the ink stains that may litter your notebook as a result of this quill, there is no better option. I used this very quill when writing this article and here I am. It's a little more expensive than an ordinary pen, with an estimated value of 3903 NP, but for the Neopian Times no expense should be spared!
On the road for fame and glory? Yes, you are!
Neopian Times Pencil Case
Now you have a notebook and a quill, two essential parts of becoming published. Somehow you need to be able to write. But where will you keep the quill? You cannot leave it lying around since you may lose it! Luckily for you, the Neopian Times has already thought of this and introduced the Neopian Times Pencil Case! It will keep all of the stationery you need to write your first, exciting article safe from the Meepits. The marketing slogan? Well, that reveals a little secret about this pencil case.
'If you are bored in class, you can always read this pencil case.'
Reading the pencil case! When you're struggling for inspiration and ideas all you need to do is read the pencil case and I know that it will inspire you. I used this pencil case when thinking of an article to write and here I am. The estimated value of this wonderful piece of stationery is 3009 NP, which is a bargain! For your very first Neopian Times article, what expense could you spare?!
Are you one step further toward your first article? Yes, you are!
Neopian Times Mug
Now you have lots of the essentials you need to start writing a piece for the Neopian Times. An idea? Check. Stationery? Check. However, writing an article isn't an easy roller coaster ride. During those long nights you sit up writing and brainstorming, you'll need something to keep you awake, such as coffee! But an ordinary coffee cup will not do; the Neopian Times Mug is perfect! Why travel all the way to the Coffee Cave when you can have coffee in your own Neohome in the perfect mug? The slogan for this item is:
'How cool, this mug has Neopian Times articles printed on it!'
This is perfect for writers looking for ideas late at night. Just like the pencil case, you can read it and be inspired once again. Perfect! I drank coffee from this mug in my Neohome late one night whilst struggling for ideas, and here I am. The estimated value of this mug is 2698 NP, a small price to pay for ideas. For your very first night writing a Neopian Times piece, this cannot be missed.
Are you close to becoming a published writer? Affirmative.
What to Avoid
Of course, just as there are good pieces to help inspire you, there are pieces of Neopian Time merchandise you should steer clear of. They will lull you into thinking that they'll help you and then they'll quickly turn on you before you can say Dr. Sloth or, "Look, it's the Meepits!"
The very first of these items would be the Neopian Times Bean Bag. Although they are right when it says that it will not smudge on your clothes, it is not all that soft nor is it squishy. Old copies of the Neopian Times are used on the inside which makes for very uncomfortable seating, as I found out! In addition, it's so small that you can't reach your writing desk with it. This will not help your publish your first Neopian Times article; it could lead to paper cuts.
The Neopian Times Issue #3 Plushie has many of the same problems as the Neopian Times Bean Bag. Whilst you're comfortably dreaming of giant Neopian Times chasing you, the last thing you need is the paper inside of this plushie poking you and waking you up. Or perhaps you do - it depends on if you like giant Neopian Times or not.
You may wonder why the I Love Neopian Times T-Shirt isn't something that would help you have your first written piece published in the Times, but the truth is that the ink of it runs. Walking into the Neopian Times offices with ink running down your arms will not impress anyone. Even worse would be that you could smudge your article with it making it look messy and unreadable.
Whilst writing this article, this reporter found little to no use for the Neopian Times Paper Rack. If you have invested in one, perhaps you could send it over to Tyrannia as the Tyrannian Kacheeks and Usuls will be able to make it into firewood.
The Framed Neopian Times and the Neopian Times Poster? Buy them after you've been published, preferably with your article in it. It'll be crowned for the longest time... until your next article, anyway.
So there you have it. The useful, and not so useful, Neopian Times items that you need as a reporter to become inspired and published. Then, when you see your name in print, you can consider becoming the greatest writer there ever will be.