 Neopets Offline
by stoicjohn
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It's 2:30 pm on a Friday at Viral Chia Incorporated, but there is only one office light shining on the production floor. Chiaynne sent his last employee home almost an hour ago, but someone has to stay behind to monitor the servers and check the neomail in case one of his customers sends a frantic last minute request. Of course, there’s a strict “no playing on the Internet” policy, so Chiaynne is allowed to spin around in his chair, build small crossbows out of paperclips, and steal his co-workers’ office supplies, but he’s not allowed to play Neopets. He thinks he could sneak around and play on one of the shared computers in the lobby, but he doesn’t want to make the boss mad and is doubly worried about that crazy Skeith from the computer repair department. Their only conversation went like this:
*RING RING*
“Thank you for calling the IT department, have you tried turning your computer off and on again?”
“YES WHY ELSE WOULD I BE CALLING YOU IF THAT ACTUALLY FIXED THE PROBLEM!”
“OK, call back when it boots up.”*CLICK*
But he just might be an evil mastermind biding his time and waiting for a chance to steal Chiaynne’s Faerie Slingshot while he least expects it, so he refuses to log in to Neopets at work. Is there new News? Could there be a new weapon for sale in the Hidden Tower? What about the Neopian Times, could the TNT editorial have finally explained why Cloud Paint Brushes were the top Altador Cup Prize last year? Chiaynne won’t know until he gets home and can log in; in the meantime he must find a way to play Neopets... without a computer!
Failing to plan is planning to fail.
Chiaynne likes making lists, so he sits down and makes a list of Neopets things he can do without being logged in, then he makes a list of lists that he can make. First up is a list of the Booktastic Books that he hasn’t read yet; he’s really been trying to get himself one of those fancy trophies. Taking a few minutes to plan ahead and then having a check list will make it a lot easier for him to find the best deals on the books he needs. The same thing applies to stamps. A quick check list and Chiaynne realized he’s missing all of the cheap Neoquest 2 stamps; he must have just forgot to buy them. But now he has an easy to read checklist of all the stamps he’s planning to buy, he’ll do price checks when he gets home so he’ll know how much he needs to save to update his stamp collection.
Tired of making lists, Chiaynne decides it’s time to make a training schedule. He has a lot of work to do before he’s ready for the next big guild war; he wants to reach the next strength boost so his attacks will be more effective but doesn’t want to waste money on negg training or risk the Lab Ray when he knows he can put the time in at the training school and get stronger. Chiaynne makes a chart with days across the bottom and the number of classes he’ll need up the side. Now he can stay on top of his training on Mystery Island and won’t forget to finish a course. Some quick math and Chiaynne knows how many codestones it will take to reach his goal, and as long as he sticks to his schedule, he’ll have no problem winning his League in the next event.
Art Gallery/Beauty Contest
Borrowing some markers from his co-worker’s desk and some paper from the mailroom, Chiaynne decides that it’s art time at Viral Chia Headquarters. Scorchio Day is coming up soon, so he’s going to make a self-portrait; he can enter it in the Beauty Contest and if he thinks it's good enough he might submit it to the Art Gallery too when he gets home and scans it into his computer. First the portrait for the Beauty Contest and then a quick drawing of the IT Skeith being zapped by Dr. Sloth’s ray gun; this is going to be a fun night.
Poetry Contest
It's 3 o’clock with hours to go, Chiaynne writes a poem to make the day flow. He can write about dreams, or Altador teams; he knows she’ll succeed if he just finds a theme. Would a poem about socks make him a star? Bad idea. He moves on because that’s just bizarre.
But it's 3:30 now and soon he must go. Chiaynne’s worked a half hour with nothing to show. A poem with no end, what’s this mess he has penned? If he takes a bow, and sends it in now, the poetry judge will say “NOOOOOOOOO!”
3:45 now. As time seems to slow, Chiaynne sees the end of his poetry show. His poem he’ll refine, he can make it divine, and still make it home for the Snow... ager? 0_o
*CRUMPLING PAPER*
Random Contest
Anyway, Chiaynne has gotten his poetry fill for the year and moves on to raid the office kitchen. Nothing here but some dried noodles and leftover omelettes. PERFECT! Macaroni Art is the theme for the latest Random Contest. You never know when a good Random Contest will pop up, so Chiaynne keeps an eye out for one that he can do. Borrowing a little glue and paper from another office he settles down to make a nice portrait of his petpet out of somebody else’s lunch. He can take his portrait home after work and submit when he’s back at his home computer. The Random Contest is good for a trophy and an avatar, plus someone at the office will be missing their lunch tomorrow so maybe Chiaynne can have them pick something up for him too.
The Neopian Times
It’s finally 5 o’clock, so Chiaynne gets to go home. It was just another boring night at work; maybe he should have spent that time writing a Neopian Times article. It would have gotten him a cool trophy and eventually an avatar if he writes enough of them. It’s really not that hard, you just have to write about something you know about. If only Chiaynne could think about something to write about while he spins in his chair at Viral Chia Incorporated.
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