Enter the Snowflake's lair... Circulation: 181,285,215 Issue: 442 | 7th day of Hunting, Y12
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The Hunt for Hunting Equipment


by creative008

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The Month of Hunting is just around the corner, so why not buy some hunting gears to celebrate its arrival? And Tyrannian Victory Day is coming, so those of you who saved the Tyrannia from the Monoceraptor’s wrath, make sure to throw a party for your hard work!

What should I begin with? Here’s a clue— Finneus’ best friend! Yes, books! I mean, how are you going to hunt without any knowledge? Okay fine, the Cave Chia is a rather dim-witted hunter, but he is still successful and somewhat famous. However, you need knowledge to hunt, or else your prey will probably escape. I will recommend you two helpful books— Hunting The Meerca Way and The Ogrin Hunter. However, they will only teach you the fundamental methods of hunting; you will need to try out the real thing to discover your true talents of hunting. What are you waiting for? Go ahead! Test out your reflexes!

No! Stop! I’m just kidding! You can’t catch anything with just your bare hands or paws! You need weapons! A hunter’s best friend is the spear because it is durable and very useful, but you have to be accurate or else your victim will evade the attack with ease. Use the Double Pointed Spear, if you are an amateur, or the Fire Tipped Spear when you want a quick meal because it will barbeque your prey until it is a blackened kebab! Also, strike your prey with the Lightweight Maractite Spear as it is light (obviously!) and deadly accurate, so you don’t have to worry about missing your victim.

Next, you will need something to catch your prey with. Of course, a net! You can buy one if you like or make one yourself. It’s easy to make one! All you need are just skills! However, in my opinion, I will stick with the ‘purchasing a net’ idea, as it doesn’t waste as much time as making your own net. I would buy a Maractite Throwing Net or Tangle Net Gun if I were you because it’s user-friendly and the Tangle Net Gun conserves a lot of space rather than a bulky and heavy net. Or if your prey is a hyperactive one, then catch it with a Sturdy Petpet Cage. Dig a hole with a Basic Shovel to trap your prey or simply purchase a Dirt Hole. If your prey tries to escape, then trap it with a Super Sticky Balthazar Trap.

Okay, we have books, spears, nets and traps; what else do we need? Arrows, of course! Buy the Jungle, Forest or even Plains Arrow, they’re very cheap! But, what’s an arrow without a bow? I would suggest buying an Earth Faerie Bow. It’s a bow made out of entirely twigs and branches and it is a perfect camouflaged weapon especially when you hunt in a forest or jungle. Last but not least, you need an Ultimate Bullseye II Quiver to put your arrows in. Also, you can customize your pets with it. You can also equip yourself with darts like the Poison Dart, Super Poison Dart, Super Hemlock Dart or the Mysterious Hemlock Dart, but just make sure not to poke yourself with these venomous weapons or you will be in for a treat. If you are really poor in accuracy, then grab some Accurate Flotsam Darts from the shelves and sit back and relax while seeing your opponent shriek in pain! Ouch! If not, practice your aiming skills with a dartboard, maybe a Sloth Dartboard (if you’re a Grundo), or a Darigan Dartboard (if you hate Lord Kass).

Great! Now you are armed, but what about your costume? Purchase a Leafy Superpack from the NC Mall as it blends well with your surroundings or a Ready for Adventure Style Pack. Also, try wearing a mask when you hunt because you wouldn’t want your victims to spread rumors about you if they escape. Sabotage Esophagor by wearing the Esophagor Mask or maybe a Lenny Paper Mask or even a Scary Witch Mask (Send a shiver down your prey’s spine!). You wouldn’t want to trudge around barefooted when you’re hunting, right? So put on a pair of Boots of Leaping and pounce onto your prey if they try to escape, or maybe a pair of Wellington Boots to keep your feet dry from the filthy mud or puddles of water.

Drip! Drip! Did you hear something? Arrgh! My head is wet and dirty! Never fear! Pick a hat from the shelves of the Grooming Parlour or the NC Mall. Maybe you might like the Bird Nest Hat (Let’s hope no Mutant Lennies would perch on the hat!), and also try wearing the Daring Adventurer Hat too. Gloves are also important especially when handling your dead prey, so put on a pair of Ultra Rubber Gloves.

I think that’s all, but wait! I have a feeling I’m forgetting something. Oh, I know! Camouflage! You need to have camouflage when you hunt to avoid being spotted by your prey. So, purchase a Camouflage Paint Brush. Quick, while stocks last! Or, you can buy an Invisible Paint Brush instead, provided you can find it. But still, camouflage is optional, if you are swift and agile, that is.

Finally, go outdoors and hunt. Here’s a word of advice: play some games to practice your hunting skills first such as The Haunted Shootery and Evil Fuzzles from Beyond the Stars, and test your swiftness with Ice Cream Machine or your alertness with Igloo Garage Sale - The Game. Don’t fret if your prey escapes or if you get injured or even if your ‘prey’ tries to eat you up (Aah! Panic!!!). Just have fun!

Hunting is an awfully dangerous thing to do, so think twice before you hunt and if you are not up for the challenge, then forget whatever information you have just read. By the way, if anything happen to you, remember not to mention my name, okay? Have a great Month of Hunting and be especially good to your rowdy Lupe, Hissi, Moehog, Koi or Yurble as you may never know what might happen to you if you treat them badly. You might even be their next target!

 
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