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How Not To Get Tangled In Your Own Webs


by chia625_2001

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HAUNTED WOODS - Hi, this is jaye01553 the Buzz, but just call me Jaye. Anyway, when I last when to the games, I got onto the high scores for Web of Vernax. Not to the trophies, mind. But I did get in the top 100. Probably other people have overtaken it already. Still, I was rather surprised. Maybe it was the fact that it was the 1st of the month. Or maybe that my own Spyder had given me some secr.... scratch that. Or maybe I'm just good at it.

Anyway, I decided to just sit down and write an article... wait, that's what I'm doing right now. Well, I guess you were expecting a guide of some sort, so I'll guess I'll jump right to it. I'll also have Webber, my Snow Spyder to help me with this. He's really knowledgeable, plus he can get me some Neocola as I'm typing. Webber, you want to type something?

Webber: ...slavedriver....

Ahem, nevermind. Well, let's start.

WHAT'S WHAT

The Spyder: Well, that's you. Not really you, but you in the game. You get to spin webs anywhere, plus you seem to have this amazing ability to teleport from place to place, since every time you spin a new web, you can choose another location and instantly jump there and spin another one.

The Vernax: That's your prey, and frankly, with all the Spyders gobbling them up, I can see why they're so hard to get in real life. Why can't they have more variety in their diet, like Breeblys, Cootys, Moaches...

Webber: Ahem....

Sorry. Anyway, your job is to trap them in your handy dandy webs, and have them for dinner. Though, if it were me, I would prefer a nice cartoonish mallet to flatten them as revenge for stealing my Chocolate Chip Cookie. But that's just my opinion.

Webs: You spin this, and trap the Vernax. They have to have no gaps, and have a nice squarish- or cuboid-like figure to trap them, but old Webber can just trap them in a circle, a diamond, a star, a pentagon, a justokoicancananny...

Webber: Is that even a shape?

Be quiet. I'm on a roll here.

Webber: And I think you should get off it and go exercise.

Be quiet. Anyway, they have to be four-sided. The smaller the web, the better your score. Trapping 2 or more Vernax gets you a nifty bonus, and trapping 4 or more gives you this really cool music.

Mutant Red Spyders: I didn't even know there were Mutant or Red Spyders. Well, you won't like these guys, since they will eat your webs. Thankfully, they won't free your trapped Vernax, but it's still pretty annoying. If you want to kill them off, if they finish eating one of your webs and it stops there in the middle of nowhere, they die. They don't show up too often, on levels 6, 7, 13, 14, you know the rest.

Spyderbits:

Webber: You left out a 'e' there.

Spyderbites: Thank you. Now fetch me a Neocola. Apple preferably.

Webber: *Grumble grumble*

Anyway, these will appear as little Spyders. They won't move, but will disappear if you don't pick them up after some time. The score they give is dependant on the length of thread you spun from where you were to get to it. If it sounds confusing, if the length of the thread on which you spun to get the Spyderbites is 17 tiny squares long, you get 17 nifty points. Picking up 10 of these will give you an extra life.

Clock: This represents the time you have left before you lose a life. Doesn't usually have a big impact, but it will if you keep looking at it. It will reset if you lose a life through the clock or you move on to the next level.

Tiny Spyders below the screen: Number of Spyderbites you've collected.

Tiny Spyders below the Clock: Number of Spyderlives you have left. You start with 3. You lose 1 each time the time runs out or a Vernax touches your web before it reaches its destination. You get 1 for every 10 Spyderbites.

Restart Game, Start, Instructions and Send Score Button: Are you stupid?

EXTRA TIPS:

Don't look at the clock.

Judge when and where the Vernax is going to move.

Decide if the Spyderbite is worth a life.

Dislike Mutant, Red Spyders.

Try to get the nifty music when you trap 4+ Spyders in a web or trap it in a really small space. Outrageous might be small, but not small enough.

Dislike Neggs.

Spyderbites are your friends.

Finishing 1 level in 4 or less webs gives you bonus points.

Dislike Neggs.

All the above will be helpful in your game. Uh... except for the Dislike Neggs. But I do. And so should you.

LEVELS

Level 1: 1 Vernax. Yawn.

Level 2: 2 Vernax. Double Yawn.

Level 3: What do you think?

Level 4: 4 Vernax.

Level 5: 4 Vernax. Yes, again.

Level 6: 5 Vernax. Oh, and 1 Red Spyder.

Level 7: 5 Vernax. 2 Red Spyders.

Level 8: Level 1. Except the Vernax is faster.

Level 9, 10, 11, 12, 1... : Zzzzz...

CONCLUSION

Huh? Wha? You woke me up. Where's Webber? He might have gotten lost. Or attacked by Meepits. Or worse.... he might have forgotten my Neocola!

Hey, Webber! Webber?

Webber: I've got you now Vernax! Say your prayers!

Vernax: Your prayers!

Webber: Roll over!

Vernax: *rolls over*

Webber: Now...

WEBBER! WHERE'S MY NEOCO-- Oooh! It seems Webber has a Vernax in its mouth. Have you been feeding it lately? Anyway, a funny thing happened when I was searching for you. This Jelly Meepit came screaming while riding on a runaway Snowball Machine while screaming "Runaway Snowball Machine! Runaway Snowbal-- Oooh! Cookie Crumbs!" It was hilarious. And you know what else?

*A Jelly Meepit came screaming while riding on a runaway Snowball Machine while screaming "Runaway Snowball Machine! Runaway Snowbal- Oooh! Cookie Crumbs!" and crashed into jaye, knocking both conveniently unconscious.

Vernax: Idiots of yours?

Webber: Never seen them before.

CHOMP!

Disclaimer: No Vernax, Tonus, Snowball Machines or Jelly Meepits were hurt during the making of this article.

 
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