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Lem-o-Squeezy Countdown


by advance469

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From the shores of Mystery Island to the farmers' town of Meridell, plunging through underwater Maraqua, all these extraordinary places have something in common - lemon! The Meepits of Haunted Woods use them in their diabolical squeeze-your-eyes plots, Krawk Island even has its pirate lemonade-a-day games; why, Bonju too makes a specialty in this art of lemon squeeze and kidnap (bet you didn't know that, eh?)!

Wait a minute... lemon?! How can lemon be so popular? Oh, come on, everyone knows that lemons are a compulsion of who wants to maintain a diet! You can't go without a Lemon a day! The flavor, the sourness, the acidity: they all combine to result in an epic experience. Lemon! Just its name awakens and revitalizes you! And as the old saying says: "A Lemon a day keeps the Meepits away!" *evil cackle*

So I now will, for you - the non-lemon reader, and your sourness - present the countdown of the top ten LEMON! delicatessens in Neopia. Because how else would you ever get a good night sleep without Lemon dreams?

NUMBER TEN: Lemon Bubble Pizza

The first lemon wonder comes from Faerieland. And... it's a pizza! Packed with the most tasty flavor ever, this pizza promises with a hint of sweetness. And look - it provides bubbles too! Now what better could you wish for on a nice Saturday evening? Fab-u-lous.

NUMBER NINE: Lemon Meringue Baby Food

Now here's a great dessert for your newborn pets! It's lemon. But... it's in a jar. How strange. And meringue! Yummy. You can eat it. Or you could decide to eat the label, too... the paper would be kinda soft. But hey - it would taste like lemon! You could even eat the jar, but then I wouldn't be responsible for any kind of lemon anomalies in your body. I'm not a lemon doctor... but it's still tastes like lemon, though.

NUMBER EIGHT: Lemon Slushie

From baby-pampering food we move up (or down) into Happy Valley, where we encounter another lemon item! Lemon slushies could not be better on a hot summer day... or a cold day, a chilly fall day, a spring day, a winter day, a windy day, a calm day, a boring day, an exciting day, a lemon day, a school day, a lemon day, a holi-day, a sour day... as you see, every day is great for lemon! Lemon slushies make you taste the bitter cold with a speck of lemon smoothness. And they are freezing cold! Lem-o-chilly! They just beg to be drunk (or eaten?) in one whole gulp, so go ahead and try it today! It's so chilly... brrr!

NUMBER SEVEN: Lemon Jelly

A total feast. After refreshing yourself with Lemon Slushie, it's time to soothe your throat with some jelly. It looks like simple jelly, but... it's lemon jelly! And whatever contains lemon, is COOL! You name it. Anything. It also can duplicate as a really cool hair gel. And makes a really awesome peanut-butter and lemon jelly sandwich with a jelly drink. Just make sure it's lemon. And the good stuff, do not make the Meepits sell you bad lemons!

NUMBER SIX: Lemon Gummy Sword

Great weapon for the Battledome! Yep, what better to frighten your opponent loaded with Super Attack Peas than with a Lemon Sword? It would totally pwn them. Emerging victorious with this weapon means brightening the name of lemon. It would go down in lemon history forever. If you lose... well, instead of blaming yourself, just eat it. Yummy. What do you mean, it's only a toy?! Pah...

NUMBER FIVE: Lemon Neodrops

The combining of certain lemonized ingredients to form these Neodrops have been so extendedly studied over the centuries that the result forms simply the best candy in Neopia. Ever. The Chocolate Factory should be proud as it is one of its best-sellers. The one of a kind flavor contained in each of these lemon drops are beyond imagination. Nearly like magic. Plus, it sticks to the top of your mouth, providing an excellent refresher all day long.

NUMBER FOUR: Lemon Coral Chair

Heaven for your body and mind. This chair combines royal seating with lemon aroma to keep your Neohome always freshened with lovely lemon perfumes while you read the latest issue of the Neopian Times. Tell me, is there anything better than this? Also, licking it occasionally never hurt anyone... in fact, the lemon taste comes right through. Kinda.

NUMBER THREE: Lemon Faerie Bubble

It's a bubble... but lemon-flavored! Cool. And it's also blessed by the Lemon Faerie, so that is really awesome! When you cannot pass the last level of Meepit vs. Feepit or just on a normal Neopian day, eat this and it will give you good luck all day long. Wonderful. It may burst before the charm works, but they do not give any refunds, sorry.

NUMBER TWO: Lemon Chia Pop

This is magical, thus it carries an extremely high price tag. This item is super rare and dedicated to the exquisite lemon Neocollectors only; however, it has the ability to transform your pet into a Lemon Chia! Sweet lemons, right?

And I will now present the best, the most alluring item in the whole of Neopia, the lemon king....

NUMBER ONE: Lemon

Yeah, you did not expect that, did you? The reality is that Lemon is present in every single item in our countdown, and consequently without it, this article could not exist! The Lemon is the epitome of sourness, making it a pure wonder and the base ingredient of all that is lemon in Neopia.

So, I hope I have educated you on the best lemon items out there. Ready to spend some Neopoints on your gourmet foods? Great, but um... what are you still doing here?! You should be already spending your money on lemon! Now go, spread the wisdom throughout the lands - and I bet you this is something that even King Hagan doesn't know, and if you are lucky, he might even give you the so coveted avatar.

Remember: LEMON is the greatest, don't you forget!

 
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