White Weewoos don't exist. *shifty eyes* Circulation: 171,606,722 Issue: 178 | 18th day of Awakening, Y7
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The Case of the Invisible Incident: Part Five


by tambourine_chimp

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From the Case-Files of Kojak_Hommes, Private Eye Lupe…

Slightly annoyed at the way I'd just be turned-out on my ear, I stomped up the path to my own Neohome, opened and walked through the door, slamming it heavily behind me with a growl.

     "You're back then, Kojak?" my owner, the one Tambourine_Chimp I tell you so much about, as almost immediately from the living room, the faint tap-tap-tapping indicating that he was typing yet again.

     "Nothing escapes you, does it?" I muttered grimly as I stalked into the room, jumping into a Rolling Chair, which - believe it or not - rolled with the momentum closer to the blazing fireplace.

     "You're home late," TC announced from above a ream of paper, "been on another case?"

     "Not anymore!"

     "Solved it?"

     "Fired is more like it," I snarled softly.

     "Oh…"

     "Oh? Is that all you can say, oh?" I exclaimed in disbelief, spinning around in my chair to face the typewriter my owner was hiding behind. "I've had an awful day, a rubbish case, got fired because my client - sorry, ex-client - thought I was rubbish at my job, and I just had to walk all the way home in the freezing snow, and all you can say is oh? Are you even human?"

     "What's in a name?" TC asked sarcastically, still not looking up from his precious work.

     "Oh, right, of course your not…anyway, you could still act more like one and have some consideration! Hmph…oh."

     There was a long, painful silence between us, interrupted only by the never-ending monotony of the keys of the typewriter tap-tapping away.

     "So," TC began cautiously, the top of his furry brown head rising from above his machine, "had a good day?"

     "You," I snapped wryly, a smirk appearing reluctantly on my faces, "are a regular comedian, you know that?"

     "Well, it cheered you up, didn't it?" TC smiled broadly, returning to his work. "And besides, don't sweat it, Kojak. If this guy just fires you for no apparent reason, then obviously he's a nut case. There's not a single mystery you can't solve, and I should know."

     By this he meant the activity he and I sometimes held before going to bed. During the day he would type up a little mystery, adding everything I would need to solve whilst at the same time making it as difficult as possible. I always got it right, of course, but most of the fun came from trying and seeing what wonders my owner could devise. Plus it gave me more insight and intelligence into the world of crime.

     "Yeah, maybe he was nuts…"I sighed as I spun full circle, paws dragging slowly in the thick rug. Then a sight caught my eyes and I stopped myself, eyebrow raised, glowing chin dropping, "No," I corrected myself as I stared out the window in disbelief, "I know for a fact that he is nuts."

     "Oh?" my owner asked curiously, "And how is that?"

     "Because he's running up the path, waving his arms like a madman, that's how!"

     ~**~

     Would you believe it, no sooner does the little runt kick me out of his house, then another theft is committed and he realizes the error of his ways, begging me to come back and "put an end to it all" rather melodramatically.

     So what could I say? It was winter, and besides being as cold as having the Snowager give you a hug, it was still the Season of Giving and Forgiving, so thanks to tradition I had little choice but to say that I'd still help.

     As we walked back to his house, my luminous fur lighting up the way before us like a novelty version of those torches on sticks all those carolers use, Cal filled-me in on the current happenings.

     "It's a book this time," he shouted against the howling winds of the winter, a battle he might have lost had it not been for my acute sense of hearing. "I was reading it in the living room when I went out for a while to get more wood for the fire. When I got back my book was hovering in mid-air, floating towards the stairs. When whoever it was noticed I had seen them, they shot up the stairs and slammed the door. When I got up on the landing, all the door were shut, and I don't want to accuse the wrong one!"

     "Got it, " I sighed reluctantly, "so you want me to do it instead…find out who did it, I mean, no accuse the wrong person."

     When we finally reached the house winds died down (oh yes, nature has a amazing sense of humor…King Skarl would have a great time if he just went outside), and I had time to notice that the windows to the living room were locked from the inside. Bang went my "winches and rope" idea back in part three…

     Taking a deep breath, I composed myself before stepping back into the house I had not long before been banished from. I can tell you, it felt strange being back so quickly.

     "You said the thief took a book this time," I muttered softly as I began to examine the living room. "I thought humans couldn't read Neopian books?"

     "Well, I've never had any trouble," Cal told me with a shrug, "though they never disappear when I've finished with them."

     "Hmm, and I bet you don't get anymore intelligent, either," I murmured.

     "What was that?" the boy snapped suddenly.

     "Nothing…"

     I would've quickly tried to have changed the subject, but thankfully I didn't need to…the sound of breaking glass right outside the window distracted the boy and myself all by itself.

     As he began to make his way to the window, crept past him back onto the front landing, opened the door and went over to the living room window. There was Cal, nose pressed against the glass pane, eyes pushing themselves down as they tried to see what had broken.

     If he saw anything then he had better eyesight then me, surprisingly, because there was nothing there whatsoever. No glass, no contents, no nothing.

     "Maybe it broke somewhere else?" Cal called, his voice muffled through the glass.

     "Maybe you should just let me do my job for once, you little brat," I hissed back.

     "What was that?!"

     "Nothing…"

     But back to the matter at hand (or should that be paw?). Namely, the breaking-glass-that-wasn't-breaking-glass. There was the slightest possibility that both me and the boy had mistaken the sound, that either it had been something else or that it had happened somewhere else. But, then again, breaking glass had a very familiar noise, and it was unlikely that what we both heard was anything other then a jar, bottle or vase smashing.

     But if this was the case, where was it now? Sitting down on my haunches, I sat and stared at the patch of grass directly below the window from a variety of different angles, hoping to spot the elusive shards of glass glinting in the dim winter sunlight. No luck there, I just looked like an expectant Horus searching for a single grain of corn.

     And then a thought hit me, and I marveled at the mere simplicity of the idea. If my hunch was correct, I'd have nailed this case closed with six-inch nails of smugness. Lowering a paw slowly onto the grass, I began to pat and rub the grass slowly and carefully, searching blindly for what I hoped desperately would be there.

     A few seconds and a yelp of pain later, and I shot my paw back up. It was stinging, and something warm and wet was stuck to it. Using my other paw, I half clenched it over the area of pain, grab the cause of it, and yanked it out quickly.

     I'd had cut myself on the glass…glass I couldn't see.

     "Gotcha now, sunshine," I muttered grimly as, sucking my aching paw I walked back into the house.

     "What happened?" Cal asked as he saw me enter the living room again, holding my poor paw. "Have you figured out who it is yet?"

     "Yes, I have, so you can stop bugging me," I grumbled sharply as I slumped into one of his Red Bean Bag Chairs.

     "So it was Tony," the boy whispered sadly as he walked to the landing, ready to call the invisible Shoyru and give him the old heave-ho.

     "Hold your Unis for a second, pal," I snapped, causing him to stop in his tracks and step back into the room. "It wasn't Tony, it never has been, not unless he felt he had to use the…never mind, at least I know he was right all along, someone's been trying to frame him."

     "But…but who?" Cal asked in disbelief, staring at me wide-eyed.

     "Before I tell you that, would you mind calling your pets down?" I asked in reply, looking smugly to the window that had helped me crack the case. "I think they should all hear this…"

To Be Continued…

 
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Other Episodes


» The Case of the Invisible Incident: Part One
» The Case of the Invisible Incident: Part Two
» The Case of the Invisible Incident: Part Three
» The Case of the Invisible Incident: Part Four
» The Case of the Invisible Incident: Part Six



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