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Sticky, Sweet, Controversial: Jelly


by danceswithpampers

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Oh, yes. We’ve all pondered how they came about, where they are from, and how they maintain their gooey shape. What am I speaking of, you ask? Why, Jelly, of course! As we all know, there is much speculation on the topic of Jelly World, but this is not what I have come to write about. I propose that we redirect our attention on the curious foods that are made out of that highly controversial and completely delicious substance: Jelly!

Because I wish to completely avoid the topic of whether or not “Jelly World” does in fact exist, I shall steer away from the controversial topic and, instead, focus on the delicious little treats that appear to be direct results of this so-called phantom world. In my travels, I have come across many different flavors of this sticky substance and have, in conclusion, come up with a list of ten Jellies that are particularly delicious. So, my dear Neopians, let us prepare to feast on some of the most delectable foods in Neopia.

1. Raspberry Jelly Muffin:

What’s better than a Raspberry Muffin? A Raspberry Muffin made entirely of jelly, that’s what! The perfect combination of sweet and tart flavouring creates a nearly indescribable sensation for your taste buds. The smooth texture of the jelly, in addition to the tart, yet sweet, flavours of the raspberry extract creates a taste that is simply unforgettable. Whether you eat it on the way to school, or while smashing a few staff members, this delectable treat is one that will surely leave your taste buds begging for more.

2. Jelly Fries:

It sounds good, because it is. For all those fast-food loving Neopians out there, this jelly treat is one for the books. What makes it so special? (Besides the fact that its jelly and fries in one delicious combination!) The fact that, unlike most fast foods, (including the absolutely scrumptious Cheese and Eel Burger) this little treat won’t go straight to your thighs! Nope, this yummy little ditty is made out of 100% pure jelly. What does that mean exactly? It means it’s completely nutritious, that’s what! So all you Usuls out there, worrying about eating healthy regardless of taste, Jelly Fries are the food for you! They’re a perfect combination of taste and nutrition!

3. Jelly Cereal:

Who doesn’t love cereal? What about cereal that comes with an edible spoon and edible bowl?! Jelly Cereal is truly one of a kind. If I had to describe it in one word? I’d be in trouble, because there’s no way to describe its jelly goodness in one word. To some, it tastes like strawberries, to others it tastes like chocolate milk. This strange jelly is said to absorb the consumer’s favorite taste, while taking on the form of cereal in a bowl. How strange! This one-of-a-kind jelly has made it onto my list of top ten, due to the fact that it is, well, cereal in an edible bowl! Ingenious!

4. Black Currant Jelly Hot Dog:

Just when you thought hot dogs couldn’t get any stranger. The Black Currant Jelly Hot Dog is possibly the sourest jelly in existence. The bizarre combination of the sour taste of the black currant and the smooth, soft texture of the jelly will leave your taste buds buzzing. Literally. It has been rumored that this jelly has strange side effects, but this remains to be seen. All I can say is there is probably a reason Fyora stays clear of it.

5. Jelly Bread:

Jelly Bread is possibly the strangest bread in all of Neopia, second only to a Loaf of Pea Bread. What makes this bread so strange, you ask? Well, that would, no doubt, be the fact that Jelly Bread looks like jelly, feels like jelly, but tastes like an actual loaf of bread! Bizarre? I think YES!

6. Jelly Kabob:

Oh, the good old days. Nothing says fun like an old-fashioned kabob, right? WRONG! Nothing says fun like a Jelly Kabob! Jelly Kabobs are in particularly delicious because of their variety of tastes. Yes, Jelly Kabobs have numerous flavours. It sounds unusual, because it is. Some are sweet, some are sour, and it’s been said that some are even crunchy! Yes, crunchy jelly. (It tastes much better than it sounds.) The typical Jelly Kabob features tangy carrot jelly, sweet tomato jelly, sour pickle jelly, and spicy pepper jelly – all delicately distributed on a jelly stick. Yum!

7. Icy Jelly Steak:

“This jelly has been frozen to make it feel almost exactly like steak when you slice into it.” No kidding! And as if that weren’t neat enough, Ice Jelly Steak tastes like a genuine Blumaroo Steak! Yum! (Unless of course you’re a Blumaroo, in which case no offence was intended.) Nevertheless, this unusual jelly is certainly worth the coin!

8. Jelly Asparagus:

Multi-colored Asparagus! And you thought it wouldn’t get any stranger. (;D) Don’t let these delicious, non-nutritious jelly delicacies fool you! They may look like the scary vegetable, but they certainly taste nothing like your average asparagus! Famous for their variety of color and taste, alike, Jelly Asparagus is one treat you’re likely to never forget!

9. Jelly Onion:

Possibly one of the strangest jellies out there. The Jelly Onion has a putrid smell and a delicious, almost spicy taste. The combination of onion flavor and jelly texture is certainly an unusually complimenting one. Delicious with peaches, the Jelly Onion is a scrumptious jelly that is suitable for every time of the year!

10. Pirate Jelly:

Yarr! This elusive jelly is perhaps the most difficult to come across, but if you find some, you’ll be happy you did. It tastes like the sea and looks like something you’d find underneath your little brother’s bed. A fearsome combination, believe you me. Nevertheless, the Pirate Jelly has found itself on the top ten jellies list for a reason. There is something for everyone in this scurvy jelly. From its edible bandana to its grey texture that leaves your tongue blue for a week, this jelly is in a league of its own. While its exact flavor is unknown, the Pirate Jelly is assuredly as delicious, if not more so, than any other jelly you’ve had the pleasure of tasting.

I hope you have the pleasure of tasting every one of my favorite jellies. While we may never know whether or not Jelly World truly exists, one thing is clear and thoroughly undeniable: Jelly is delicious.

 
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