White Weewoos don't exist. *shifty eyes* Circulation: 174,865,621 Issue: 378 | 6th day of Awakening, Y11
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A Candychan Drama

by twocents


A light. A foot on my face. A muffled voice.

     “Go away, Androcles.”

     I peered open an eye. His white, snowy leg was immediately in my vision, and I could sort of see his condescending charcoal eyes looking down at me. He fluttered his wings a bit, and let out a huff.

     “Wake up,” he said, in a bored tone. “We’re going to go to Faerieland.”

     “What’s in Faerieland?” I mumbled, as I tried to roll over to curl back up.

     The pesky Snow Candychan standing above me wasn’t having it.

     “In about ten minutes, we will be,” he grinned. “Or is my little old Chocolate sidekick a ‘fraidy Candychan?” he added mockingly.

     With that, he flitted out of our space in the Ice Caves. Sitting up, I rubbed my eyes and sighed. We had spent enough time together, saving Happy Valley from Neopet-eating zombies and accidentally causing trouble on Mystery Island, I knew I’d follow. He caused trouble, and needed someone to save him from the people that likely wanted to scream, “Off with your head!” every time they saw him. It’s a tad strange how he brings out that feeling in people, but as his best friend, it’s my job to avoid getting any blood on me.

     Or something like that.

     I stood up wearily and looked in the mirror-like ice-covered walls. I ran a hand across my stripes that alternated between rich, dark chocolate and a lighter, milk chocolate. I fluttered my whipped cream wings a bit, and they fluffed right up. I was satisfied that I looked at least okay. If I was Androcles, I would have spent more time staring, but he’s always convinced he’s the greatest thing ever, so I don’t even know why he needs the mirror to validate that.

     Flitting outside, I scanned the ground until I found a couple of black specks staring up at me. Sometimes, it’s hard to find Androcles, but I knew he’d wait for me because he knew I’d follow.

     He shook himself up out of the snow and joined me in the air silently. As we headed toward Faerieland, it occurred to me: he was sulking.

     “Are you feeling alright?” I asked in a small voice. I felt bad about my negative thoughts toward him earlier, even though he should know better than to wake me up all the time.

     “Hmm?” he murmured.

     “Are you feeling alright?” I repeated in a louder voice.

     Androcles let out a laugh. “I’m fine. I just wanted to make you feel guilty for making me wait.”

     With that, he floated forward, and landed on a cloud just outside Faerieland. I put my head in my hand for a moment, but really, I should have expected him to do something ridiculous like that.

     I floated to land beside where he was crouched, and let out an audible sigh. “Where are we going to go now?” I asked, in the most bored voice I could muster.

     Hey, if he was going to play games by pretending to be upset, I could do the same too.

     Instead of playing along or flat-out ignoring me, as I expected, he stood up, put his hands on his hips and glared at me.

     “If you want to be a jerk, then just take your nasty attitude somewhere else. I spend all this time being nice to you, letting you be my sidekick, and you treat me like I might as well be made out of dung.” With that he turned around, crossed his arms, and let out a loud “HMPH!” sound.

     I blinked.

     “You have to be joking,” I stated in a surprised tone.

     “Not in the least, you inconsiderate meanie face,” he said without turning around.

     I blinked again.

     “You have to be joking,” I continued, “because if any of us is the jerk, it’s clearly you. You ‘let’ me be your ‘sidekick?’ More like you actively prevented anyone from ever getting to even know something as simple as my real name. And as far as your little hero act goes, I distinctly recall you stealing all of my ideas, setting me up as food bait for zombies and the Snowager, and then running away and hiding!

     “Maybe you should find yourself a new sidekick.” I glared at his back. “If anyone can stand you long enough to let you get out more than ‘side-’”

     He turned around, and spat, “I hate you, you wannabe Candychan!” He stuck his surprisingly pink tongue out at me for good measure, then kicked off and flew away from the cloud.

      “I HATE YOU MORE, YOU DEFORMED SNOWBALL!” I shouted after him.

     Fuming, I jumped from this cloud to a nearby one. I didn’t want to stand on the same cloud he had stood on. I laid back on it and closed my eyes. It felt so nice, I felt myself nod off.

     Falling asleep quickly, my dreams were vivid. I pictured our adventures on Mystery Island, and seeing him covered with snow. My dream changed to our space up in Terror Mountain, where my Christmas gift to him, a shiny necklace, hung, hiding away from thieves. And there also sat his gift to me, a creamy red cooking pot, symbolic of his affection for me.

     I blinked open my eyes. That had just been a couple months ago. I sat up, and I spotted the cloud we had been sitting on together. A pang of guilt hit me. Maybe he was just in a bad mood. I really shouldn’t have been so nasty to him over something so small. And then I let him wander off in a big city and who knows what could happen to him?

     My guilt grew a little bit more. I really need to find him. To make sure he’s okay and stuff.

     And maybe to apologize. I had started being nasty to him, really, and besides, I was the adult between the two of us. It’s okay to let things slide.

     Feeling guiltier and guiltier, I kicked up off of the cloud and headed toward the city. I spotted some clouds with water in them and some beautiful Water Faeries hanging around.

     I angled downward and stopped in midair to call out to them. She approached me, and I blushed a bit. She looked like a mermaid, with a glowing blue, scaled body, and like a goddess, with red shells tucking back long flowing locks to reveal the face of the one of the most beautiful women I’d ever seen. I gulped a bit.

     “What can I do for you, sweetie?” She leaned forward and smiled, as a voice that sounded like a melody floated around me.

     “Um,” I coughed. “Have you seen a guy that looks like me, except made of snow and with green leaf wings?”

     Her smile dropped and she asked lightly, “Is that man your friend?”

     I nodded. She didn’t need to know we were in the middle of some melodrama.

     The Water Faerie pointed toward a purple cloud looming close by. “He went in there,” she said. “I hope Jhudora doesn’t harm your buddy. Don’t do anything for her and don’t accept anything from her,” she continued in a warning tone, her voice losing the magical music-like effect. “Bad things happen to those who do.”

     When her voice darkened, my head cleared and I mentally reprimanded myself. Moon the Negg Faerie is prettier. And she puts up with me, I mean us. Androcles and me.

     I waved lightly in a silent sign of thanks and headed toward the cloud.

     The cloud oozed toxins and smelled a bit like a heap of old shoes, but it was Jhudora’s lair. She’s not exactly well known for championing smog reduction efforts here.

     I heard her sharp voice, like a glass that had just broken, call out, “How dare you insult me, you pest?!”

     Flying into the room, I saw Androcles hovering in the air – who would want to stand on Jhudora’s floors? – and Jhudora jabbing one of her long green fingernails toward him.

     A foot in my face. A muffled voice.

     “Hmm?” I asked, as I picked myself up.

     “Why did you just attack me?” Androcles said more clearly, now that we weren’t all tangled up.

     “I thought she,” I pointed toward Jhudora, whose purple and green hair was oddly frayed, “was attacking you.”

     I turned around to glare at her. “Androcles may be a loud, annoying and somewhat presumptuous Snow Candychan, but he is my loud, annoying, presumptuous Snow Candychan. Get your own, you hag-faced witch.” I glared at her some more.

     She coughed. Loudly.

     “Um, do you need a tissue?” I asked, surprised.

     She found one on a nearby table and waved at me. “This is what I get for getting out of bed today. I should have just stayed in and slept off my cold.

     “Instead,” she turned to face me and Androcles, who was now hiding behind me with a death grip on my left arm, “I get attacked by two lost petpets.”

     “Ha!” Androcles said from behind me. “Like anyone could possibly own us. We’re too good for them.”

     He flew off, still holding my arm so I was forced to follow him. I waved at Jhudora as we left, slightly surprised that she hadn’t zapped us, and called out, “Hope you feel better soon.”

     We left the cloud and started our way out of Faerieland and back to Terror Mountain. Once safely away from Jhudora’s grip, Androcles pushed me a friendly way.

     “I can’t believe you attacked Jhudora, who’s pretty much the evilest faerie in all of Neopia!” he laughed.

     “Well, I-” I started in.

     “I can’t wait to tell Moon. And she’s going to yell at you for doing something so reckless. And I will die laughing.”

     “I’m going to tell her you started it.” I dove faster. “Race you there!”

     As he gave me a thumbs up and went into a competitive crouch, I knew things were back to normal.

The End

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