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Celebrity Showdowns of Neopia


by cyniska

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There’s nothing more entertaining than watching a good rivalry unfold. The NeoFamous (or rather, Infamous) have more than their share of the squabbles. And to say squabbles is definitely understating some of these epic feuds. We’ve already seen some of these rivals battle it out, but what about the others? Or the next time? As they would say, they’ve lost the battle but not the war! Well, I’ve got your guide to smart betting in the next star-studded fight.

1. Illusen vs. Jhudora

Quoth the Neopedia: “No rivalry, it seems, is as great as the blind hatred that [Illusen] and Jhudora share.” Ever wonder why Illusen doesn’t live in Faerieland like the other Faeries? Rumour has it that she left because of Jhudora – or worse, was forced out by Jhudora. The origin of this feud is reportedly due to Illusen being the only one who witnessed Jhudora in an act of supreme evil. These two even compete for the services of ambitious Neopets by demanding certain items and giving rewards of unimaginable power to the best performers.

Illusen

Illusen is well-loved by everyone else. She is a gentle spirit (except when Jhudora is mentioned) who loves tending to her plants. She offers help to Neopians in distress and even offered sanctuary to peasants during the Battle for Meridell. Consequently, she has managed to create a network of spies and devotees willing to help her cause.

Jhudora

Jhudora is what happens to Dark Faeries if their desire to do evil and lust for power becomes unnaturally strong. Usually trouble-makers are easily weeded out, but Jhudora is much too clever to be so conspicuous. She also has an army behind her, though many may not be acting out of free will.

Analysis

Illusen has the upper hand in terms of support. Jhudora’s army of minions may crumble at any time, whether by breaking a spell or luring away the willing followers with promises of greater rewards. In addition, Illusen has most of the other Faeries on her side, including Queen Fyora, who keeps an eye on Jhudora in Faerieland.

On the other hand, I have to award smarts to Jhudora. She has gotten away with everything so far by employing others to do her dirty work. As the Neopedia puts it so fabulously, “this keeps her own hands clean and helps corrupt those who assist her. Two evils with one stone, as it were.” And according to Jhudora herself, Illusen suffers from a severe lack of imagination.

Bottom line: toss-up. Well what do you expect for such a long-running rivalry? Illusen and her allies keep Jhudora’s never-ending list of schemes in check. Neolife goes on.

2. Balthazar vs. various parties

I guess when your job is to be a bounty hunter, you tend to make a lot of enemies. Let’s review the participants in this brawl.

Balthazar

This oversized Lupe has all the characteristics of a hunter: a dark coat for camouflage, a powerful build, sharp teeth and claws, and greed to drive the whole business. He sells his catches back in Neopia for hefty profits.

Faeries

Balthazar is mainly known for hunting Faeries and selling them in jars. Neopets may recall being blessed with abilities in exchange for releasing them from their bottles. I wonder if Balthazar could make Jhudora and Illusen put aside their differences for the common good of Faeriekind?

Samrin the Kacheek

Samrin is a self-proclaimed Petpet lover and the star of the Extreme Herder avatar. Balthazar decided he could also make a large profit by capturing and selling Petpets. They also have the unfortunate bonus of being quite tasty. Though Samrin tells us he’s been bitten many a time, through devotion and nimbleness he continues to protect his flock from Balthazar’s snapping jaws. Additionally, kind Neopians will also stop by and give him a hand.

Analysis

There will always be an excess of Faeries for Balthazar to prey upon, especially since they like to fly all over Neopia. Sometimes, Neopets can even catch one out of the air! Furthermore, there is a demand for bottled Faeries by the public that allows Balthazar to keep hunting for profit. If the number of plushies, action figures, and other paraphernalia sold in Balthazar’s image is any indication, the Neopian public is captivated by this bad boy.

As for Samrin, one Kacheek can’t do it alone, but his courageous actions are inspiring other Neopians to help keep Balthazar at bay, though one or two Babaas are still likely to go missing.

Bottom line: The bounty hunter will continue to do what he does best. Frankly, I couldn’t picture him at a desk job anyway.

3. Dr. Frank Sloth vs. the Space Faerie

The Space Faerie earned the condemnation of the evil scientist back in Year Two when her intervention destroyed his mutation ray, released his army of enslaved Grundos, and forced him to abandon the Space Station. In fact, Sloth is rumoured to play darts with an image of the Space Faerie as his target. How very mature, Frank.

Dr. Frank Sloth

The origins of Sloth are shrouded in mystery, but he is thought to have been active on Neopia when the planet was still barren. For unknown reasons, he left for space and did not return to Neopia until some time later with the intention of conquering the planet. Though he failed to turn all Neopets into mutants by means of his ray, he is still known to distribute transmogrification potions to Neopians, some of whom are willing to undergo the nasty change. Later on, Sloth carried out a brilliant plan that culminated in the seizure of a magical staff which he used to wage war on Sakhmet... a war which ultimately failed. In Year Ten, he launched another campaign which also failed, even without the Space Faerie’s presence.

The Space Faerie

Living amongst the stars, the Space Faerie is well-poised to intercept any threats on Neopia from galactic powers. She is widely revered by Neopians as a hero and protector, titles which she fully earned during Sloth’s first invasion. During that war, she bravely confronted Sloth on his Space Station. Though she was captured and weakened, she still managed to rally Neopians and eventually destroy Sloth’s mutation ray. Her ability to sense Neopets in harm always allows her to come to their aid.

Analysis

Though Sloth is a brilliant scientist, his repeated failures undermine his desired image as an overlord. It is true that in the Return of Sloth, he was wise enough to distract the Space Faerie first, though that says more about the Space Faerie than him. It is to her detriment that she is so willing to help those in distress that she is so easily fooled. Whereas his egomania is a flaw, she finds strength in being cautious and not underestimating the situation. As evidenced by her diary entries, the Space Faerie was not confident in success when fighting Sloth but vowed to try her hardest anyway.

Sloth possesses vast technological resources including robots, spaceships, and artifacts, but the Space Faerie has artifacts of her own, as well as a coalition of Neopets who would rise to the challenge of defending Neopia. Youngsters like Gorix and Cylara exemplify such “ordinary” heroes.

Of note, polls indicate that Sloth has a considerable following on Neopia. In addition to willing transmogrification subjects, there are three avatars and numerous items in his image, from lunch boxes to dental floss. In fact, these items outnumber those devoted to the Space Faerie.

Bottom line: If these two go head to head, I’d score another for the Space Faerie. Despite having everything he needs to succeed, Sloth has yet to record any significant victories. Instead of being a feared ruler, he has become the object of affection of fangirls all over Neopia.

That concludes this episode of Celebrity Showdowns of Neopia! I hope you’ve enjoyed watching these rivals duke it out. As the Space Faerie would say, until next time, keep watching the stars.

 
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