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The Neolodge Files


by nonobow

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There are a lot of Neopians who are mistaken about the Neolodge. But it isn't what it looks like. The clean, corporate building with the fountain out front looks innocent enough. You just can't dump your pet there with a sandwich, a suitcase, and burger stand privileges. There are a lot of reasons why and why not, what to do and what not to do. So, it is my mission to inform you about the Neolodge, from top to bottom. Read on to experience and expose on everything Neolodge!

Economy Hotel-

A little tacky, but clean. Why not? There is a place to sleep, carpet, and a window. Not very luxurious, but adequate and comfortable for a Neolodge novice or a pet on a budget. Most pets despise these, and if you want your pet to come home flea-free and content, choose the Cheap Hotel or a higher priced room.

Hotels: Cockroach Towers NP), Fleapit Motel (10 NP), Cheap Hotel (20 NP). *

Luxury Hotel-

Plenty of room, nice drapes, and nice color. Not as cheap as the Economy Hotel, but more comfortable and cushy. The decor is nice too; so, if your pocket is a little more lined than the average Neopian, spend more on your pet to give them the semi-ultimate Neolodge stay. Pets are more likely to beg you for a long stay, and don't come home with fleas, dandruff, or other nasty parasites.

Hotels: Mountain Lodge (30 NP), Ye Olde Ship Inn (40 NP), Hotel Opera (50 NP), The Royal Neopian (80 NP).

Deluxe Hotel-

My favorite! The perfect place to stay for a luxury vacation. The color and decor is perfect, and it features a fireplace, candles, and expensive looking pillows. There is even a nice loft if your neopet wants to lounge comfortably, or throw a party during his or her stay. The best place to send your neopet if you have more neopoints to boast. They love these and always make a scene in the lobby about staying. The Presidential Suites come with a jacuzzi, sauna, and fitness center.

Faerie Castle (100 NP), Presidential Palace (200 NP), Astrovilla (500 NP).

Note: The cheaper, the worse. The more expensive are nicer, and have more luxuries. The cheaper are less decorated, less clean, and more flea-infested (who names a hotel Cockroach Towers??).

I certainly hope that helped you get an idea of which room to buy, and what the Neolodge is like on all levels. Be sure to keep checking back at the Neolodge if you can't afford it, because they offer discounts from time to time. About some more basic features:

Food:

The food isn't as good at the Economy Hotel (Scary Food is often a staple). Luxury Hotels serve flame-grilled meat and veggies (things like grog and hamburgers, sausage and eggs), and always leave a little box of mints on the tray. Deluxe Hotels serve bigger, longer meals with more courses and better food (gourmet soups, salads, fresh fruit, ice cream, and baguettes). It is basically wholesome and tasty overall.

Bathrooms:

The bathrooms always feature the basics: a shower, toilet paper, a brush, soap, and shampoo. Towels can be ordered from the staff in the Economy and Luxury hotels, while the Deluxe Bathrooms come with towels and a bathrobe. The better the room, the better the decor in the bathroom.

Maid Service:

Always good. They clean the toilets, make the beds, bring fresh linens, and refresh the fruit basket. The maids are always hard, good workers, and make the room look nice, no matter what hotel.

Bedrooms:

The Economy isn't heated or air conditioned, and the linens aren't as nice. But, the luxury hotels and deluxe hotels feature room service, nice sheets, fluffy pillows, and televisions.

I also believe that should help you decide on the basic necessities. Here is something Neopians always question: Extras.

Restaurant:

Nice food and service. Better than funding your pet with ham sandwiches, which cockroaches consume at insane rates at the Economy Hotels.

Burger Bar:

Fun music, good food and drink, witty servers, and an awesome dance floor. A must for the fast-food savvy.

Fitness Center:

If your pet likes treadmills or bench pressing, this is the place for you. Comes with a shower and a water vending machine.

Neopian Times Delivery:

You may be in the Neolodge right now, reading this article because you just received the subject of this paragraph: Neopian Times! This up-to-date, Neopian fueled paper is fun to read and entertaining.

Maid Service:

Always a nice bonus. Easier than cleaning the toilets yourself, huh?

En-Suite Bathroom:

Comfortable and functional. The bathtub has jets, the shower has a massage feature, and it is bigger and better than the typical bathroom. Also comes with a bonus: magazines, bath beads, a bath pillow, and candles so you can relax.

Jacuzzi/Spa:

Perfect for pampering and spoiling a very deserving pet. They can get their claws/beaks/fur done, facials, and massages. You pets will love this treat!

Note: Eyebrow waxing optional.

Grooming:

Getting brushed, washed, getting spritzed with body spray, and your teeth brushed is actually nice, although some pets may actually dislike this extra. Try it out and your pet will come home dirt-free.

Swimming Pool:

Great for water-loving pets like the Acara and the Kacheek. You can get your pet swimming lessons, or just let them tan poolside whenever they want. Bathing suits can be purchased at the hotel.

Tennis Courts:

A fun and athletic feature for the peppier pets. They can play a friend, get tennis lessons, or just chew on the tennis balls.

Sauna:

A steaming way to open your pet's pores, moisturize their skin, and feel clean overall. Pets with little or no fur enjoy this feature most.

Laundry Facilities:

If your pet is messy, or just packed a lot of luggage, this is a nice option. Laundry comes back smelling good, stainless, and crisp.

Well, that was the last of my comments on the Neolodge. I hope you get something out of this, and think twice before you order a room with a suspicious 5 neopoint price.

 
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