Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 177,074,008 Issue: 329 | 8th day of Awakening, Y10
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5 Reasons Why Not to Do Jhudora's Quest


by jockylocky

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JHUDORA'S CLOUD - You're standing before the mighty Jhudora; your head is in shame because your fifteen minutes are up and you couldn't get Jhudora's magical ingredient. I mean, really; fifteen minutes to hop on an Eyrie Taxi to get to Neopia Central for some ham and come back? Have you seen the lineups for the Taxis? It's just horrible. Jhudora is screaming because now her potion is ruined, and you hop away; a Mortog.

That's awful. I mean, what right does Jhudora have to zap you? And a Mortog no less? How gauche. You need to say "No!" to Jhudora once and for all, to help yourself the pain and stop spending your hard earned NP for Morphing Potions to turn yourself back into a Neopet. That's what this article is here for! It's time to stand up for what you believe in, and say "No!" to temptation!

This article will give you five good reasons to stop yourself from becoming Jhudora's next victim, and to do Illusen's Quest, because we all know that Illusen is much better, right? Of course I'm right! Now, bring on the five best reasons to say "No!"

Reason Number One: Jhudora is Evil

This is a given, naturally. She's a Dark Faerie, for Fyora's sake! And what's the one thing that Dark Faeries have on their minds? Rebellion. All the Dark Faeries want to rebel against innocent and sweet Fyora and put Jhudora as the Queen of the Faeries! By doing those quests, you are helping Jhudora succeed! Do you really want to partake in this rebellion? I imagine not.

Jhudora is using her feminine wiles to charm you into bringing her ingredients. See? I mean, see what she says when you first see her:

"I see you have been helping my sisters out... and for what? A pathetic handful of Neopoints, or maybe a level or two. It's not worth your time...

So how about it, help me find a couple of things that I am looking for and I will reward you most handsomely. Ill start you off with a couple of easy quests, and after that they will become harder, and your rewards will be greater...

However, should you fail to bring me what I need, you shall start from the beginning again... at the first quest... How about it? Do we have a deal?"

See? It may seem like she's offering riches of the ultimatum level of power, but what? After fifty quests of pure torture and thousands of zaps of turning you into a Mortog... is it really worth all of that? And never mind what I said earlier, Jhudora wants to rebel! So you're going through all that torture to help an evil Faerie succeed. If you think that's good, get some therapy. And I mean it!

Reason Number Two: Jhudora Wants to Take Over Neopia

As I said many times in Reason One, Jhudora doesn't only want to take over Faerieland. I mean, really, if an evil villain such as Jhudora can imprison Fyora and take over Faerieland... how hard can the rest of Neopia be? And villains tend to get power-hungry unfortunately.

Now you may be thinking "ZOMG! If Jhudora tries to take over Faerieland then there will be a Faerieland plot finally and we can defeat Jhudora and then we can imprison Jhudora forever and and and.... I'm gonna help Jhudora out right now! =DDDDDDDD"

Uhh... No. You're getting the wrong idea here, buddy. Neopia has been very lucky, what with the Dr. Sloth plot getting canceled and all. I mean, really, each plot ended up with a certain hero saving Neopia and getting his or her fifteen minutes of fame. Now, this extreme fortune won't last forever! One of these days a certain villain will succeed! And could you imagine if this was Jhudora? Oh man, even the most torturous things in Neopia won't be predicted as for what Jhudora has in store! We won't want to risk the fate of Neopia for some silly trophy and sidebar, do you? ...Don't answer that.

Reason Number Three: Jhudora is Just Plain Mean

Come on. She turned you into a blinking Mortog, and you want to do a quest for her? Who raised you, for Fyora's sake?! I mean, just the other day I asked her politely for another quest (I was doing research for this article, not for the sake of helping her!), and what did she say to me?

"I am not ready to give you another quest yet!"

Now that's rude! All I wanted to see if I was allowed to do her another quest, and I get this hideously rude response. I was appalled by her response. Never mind those long green fingernails just shimmering in the purple light, threatening to give me a good and painful scratch which would take days to heal. I'm really not interested in seeing my doctor at the Neopian Hospital anytime soon, to let you know.

She's mean, rude, and I'm bet she's happy that I'm saying these things, it's making her happy. See what I mean? She's happy about this! Any good Neopian that had any common sense in him/her would know that's not how Faeries are supposed to act! (Light or Dark!) Not nice at all.

Reason Number Three: She Hates Valentine's Day

She hates Valentine's Day. A day where you can send secret valentines and touch the hearts of people you care deeply about! And... she HATES it? Oh dear. I mean, Valentine's Day is supposed to be filled with happiness and love and flowers and chocolate. Who doesn't like that? Okay okay, you can stop pointing to Jhudora, I get it.

But basically you're saying you want to help someone who absolutely loathes this day and will be a grouch all day? (Yet, what's the difference?) ...I already said it, but get therapy. You need it. Badly.

Don't you just love it when you're at the back of the classroom, and Amanda the Aisha walks in and sees the Secret Valentine Card on top of her desk, and suddenly her heart is filled with love and her face shows it perfectly? Ah, so sweet. Jhudora thinks opposite, unfortunately. Do you really want to follow a Faerie that hates the most romantic day of the year? All she will give you is despair, disappointment, hurt and frustration and more. Jhudora is a big no-no.

Reason Number Four: She Hates Illusen

Ah, Illusen! Isn't Illusen so beautiful, what with her green dress and green streaks in her hair.. and that lovely braid that goes down on her shoulders... sorry! The talk about Valentines Day is getting me a bit woozy. What's this? Jhudora despises her? How can that be?

Well, many of you may or may not know... but Jhudora and Illusen were sisters! Amazing huh? So a Dark Faerie and an Earth Faerie growing up together... yeah, you can imagine the outcome. Actually, the outcome has already come out. Did that make any sense? I sure hope so! Illusen did try to make an effort to become sister-like friends with Jhudora, though. So you can't blame Illusen for Jhudora's atrocious behavior.

Jhudora.. thought Illusen was a "goody-goody-two-shoes" as some put it. She felt intimidated by Illusen, but she just tried to hide it and became worse every day. Thyora, their mother, couldn't believe it and was saddened because she hoped that Jhudora would be nice.

Unfortunately, it wasn't so. And there is our history lesson on the Faerie family tree. But really, would you want to go for some Faerie who hates kind old Illusen? Will you? I sure hope not! I won't!

Reason Number Five: Why Do Jhudora's When You Can See Illusen?

The title, as long as it is, is pretty self explanatory. I mean, really, Illusen is nice, sweet and so much better than Jhudora. She wants to HELP Neopia rather than destroy it; after all, she did help with the latest Meridell war, did she not? (On Meridell's side, of course!) She also helped Tormund and Roberta when the Darkest Faerie had control of Meridell!

Illusen is so nice and sweet, when I went to see her, she greeted me welcomingly!

"Anyway, I have a couple of jobs that you may be interested in. If you can fetch me some items from around Neopia, I can reward you with some of these cool things I have made over the years... aren't they pretty!

How about we start off with a few easy errands, and go from there. I don't want to waste TOO much of your time but I really do have to get these items you know...

Unfortunately, if you don't find my item within the time limit, then I'm going to put you right back on the easy quests! Interested??"

Isn't Illusen sweet? She didn't want to waste much of our time! Definitely shows who is much nicer, hmm?

Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end. I hope this article has repeatedly pounded the idea in your head that Jhudora cannot be trusted and should be watched at all times. After all, why would she be in the Gallery of Evil if she was a hero? Now that you know what Jhudora is up to, please support Illusen to help stop her! Now go, and be a hero!

Author's Note: Happy Jhudora Day! Thanks for reading and feedback is appreciated. -Jockylocky

 
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