Lifestyles of the Affluent and Illustrious: Mika and Carassa

TERROR MOUNTAIN – In the clear, ringing air of the silver mountaintop, a white Wocky named Yoyote is running through the snow. At her side a little Kadoatie bounces, dutifully holding a camera in its mouth. Every now and then it stops and opens its mouth to say, “Mew.”

“Oh, come on,” sighs Yoyote, picking up the Kadoatie in exasperation. “We’ll never get to the Igloo on time at this rate.”

“Mew?”

Hundreds of eyes are watching the pair curiously. The long line of Neopets straggles up the mountainside, some Neopets carrying bags of Neopoints and others holding shopping lists. All are red-cheeked with cold and anticipation.

Yoyote hurries up toward them, clutching a notepad in one hand and a pen in the other. The Kadoatie curls up on her shoulder, looking at everybody with gleaming eyes. The camera dangles dangerously from its jaw.

“Hi,” Yoyote says to one of the customers, who is still gawping at her. “My name is Yoyote, and I am a reporter from the Neopian Times Appreciation Guild. I am here to do a feature article on Mika and Carassa, and to find out why their Igloo Garage Sale continues to be so popular. So... I take it you are here to shop for the Day of Giving?”

“Of course,” the large purple Bruce replies gruffly. “You are a reporter, huh? My granddad always used to say: Never trust reporters.”

“Ah,” says Yoyote amiably, writing this down and nodding. “Why do you enjoy shopping at the Igloo Garage Sale?”

“What a stupid question,” grumbles the Bruce. “Haven’t you ever shopped there? Their prices are so incredibly cheap! Reasonably good quality, too. Where better to find great gifts for the Day of Giving?”

“Thank you,” says Yoyote, snapping her notebook shut with a flourish. “I will go to visit the Igloo this very moment.”

The Bruce roars. “You’re out of queue!”

Yoyote flashes him a dazzling smile. “I am a reporter, dear sir.” And with that, she leaps on up the mountainside. The crowd parts before her, terrified by the pointy teeth of her little Kadoatie.

Outside the Igloo, Yoyote pauses to take a picture. Then she scoops up her Kadoatie and goes inside.

*****

“Oof!” exclaims Carassa, poking her head out from behind a big box. “Look where you’re going!”

“Sorry,” says Yoyote. “I didn’t know that you were behind the box.”

“Of course I’m behind it, I’m carrying it!”

“My point exactly,” says Yoyote.

The yellow Chia thinks about this for a moment, comes to no logical conclusion, and puts the box down. “Okay,” she says eventually, “who are you?”

“My name is Yoyote, and I am a reporter from the Neopian Times Appreciation Guild. I am here to do a feature article on you and Mika. Wouldn’t you like to be interviewed?”

“Um,” says Carassa, raising her voice as the grumbles from outside grow louder, “there are tons of customers waiting for me, you know.”

“You have excellent business, indeed,” Yoyote agrees. “I am about to make your business even better by doing an article about you.”

Carassa rubs her coat nervously. “I really can’t talk to you now... it’s a tough day today because Mika got injured. He’s resting at the back there... maybe you can go talk to him?”

“Sure,” says Yoyote. “Thank you.”

Carassa nods briskly and scurries ahead to deal with the customers.

Yoyote goes deeper into the Igloo. Here, a giant wooden shelf runs across the top, with a ladder balanced precariously against it. Icicles line the bottom of the shelf, and all sorts of items are piled upon it. Candy canes, umbrellas, baubles, Dubloons, everything. Below, packed in boxes and bags, are more items – but these appear to be more organized. They have price tags on them, for one thing, and they are classified into groups.

Against a battered grand piano, Mika the blue Chia slumps, his head in a bandage. He is drinking from a huge mug of Borovan and making price tags.

“Hello,” says Yoyote, plopping down beside him. “My name is Yoyote, and I am a reporter from the Neopian Times Appreciation Guild. I am here to do a feature article on you and Carassa. Will you mind answering a few questions?”

“You’ve already asked the first one,” Mika answers.

Yoyote laughs. “Okay, here goes. How did you get hurt?”

Mika thumps the piano roughly. “Carassa was tossing things down to me to sort, and she accidentally pushed off a piano. Next thing I knew, I was in the Neopian Hospital. Darned stupid thing to happen, with the Day of Giving coming up. Now Carassa’s got to work alone.”

“Why are you selling all this stuff?”

“We’re planning on moving to a warmer home,” says Mika immediately. “So we’re selling off all our belongings.”

“Oh, come on,” chides Yoyote. “You’ve been telling everybody that for years now. We all know your Igloo Garage Sale is here to stay. Your items never diminish! In fact, they seem to grow whenever the Day of Giving comes along.”

“That’s just because we have a lot of items.”

“Yeah, right,” says Yoyote, but she grins and writes in her notebook nonetheless. “What kind of items do you sell here, usually?”

“Just a lot of old junk, cheap things that we don’t use anymore... HEY! Don’t do that!”

The Kadoatie turns, cork in paw. “Mew?”

“That’s a valuable Transmogrification Potion you’re meddling with!” Mika screeches, struggling to get up. “Put it back this instant!”

Yoyote reaches over calmly and takes the bottle away from her Kadoatie.

“Mewww...”

“Shush, you can’t have that,” Yoyote tells her Kadoatie. “I’ll buy you a snack when we get out of here, but only if you stay still. So,” she turns to Mika, “you used to hoard valuable Potions and now you’re selling them off?”

“Yeah.”

“Interesting...” Yoyote writes this down. “Where did you get all these items from?”

Mika frowns. “I can’t tell you that! It would ruin our business!”

“So you admit that you are, in fact, doing business? Not just selling things to move to a new place?”

“Fine...” sighs Mika. “You reporters sure are tricky.”

Yoyote smiles beautifully. “And I’m sure you won’t reveal that you are collaborating with the Terror Mountain tourism industry?”

“Of course not!”

“Ah.” Yoyote’s pen skitters across the page, then pauses thoughtfully. “There’s something I don’t understand, though. If you’re making so many Neopoints from this Garage Sale business, why don’t you, in reality, move to a warm place?”

“That was our plan all along,” says Mika ruefully. “You just won’t believe me.”

“Are you saving up for a really luxurious Neohome then?” Yoyote teases.

Mika sticks out his jaw. “We’re planning on moving to a warm place soon.”

“Good to know,” says Yoyote kindly. “It seems hard to keep on working here, dealing with all these items and impatient customers.”

Mika warms to these words. “Oh, but it is a rewarding job,” he says. “And not just Neopoint-wise. These folks really are grateful to us for supplying them with good, cheap wares. We are the reason for little houses shining with coloured lights on the Day of Giving. We are the reason for groups of children running around with new scarves and toys. On the Day of Giving, when we sit back to relax and drink a cup of Borovan, we are surrounded by the blessings of the gifts that we have sold.”

“Is that the only time you relax?” asks Yoyote, looking around the item-strewn igloo.

“Pretty much,” says Mika. “It really is cold up here. If you don’t move around enough, you have to keep drinking Borovan to keep warm.”

“I see,” says Yoyote. “Well, thank you for answering my questions. Can I take a picture with you?”

“Sure.”

The Kadoatie gets up purposefully with the camera. Flash!

Yoyote scoops up her Kadoatie and waves goodbye. “Have a great Day of Giving!”

“Just don’t tell anyone about our business secrets.”

“You didn’t tell me any,” says Yoyote.

On her way out, Yoyote buys a candy cane for her Kadoatie. Carassa handles the change with skilled, delighted hands. Every little sale seems to bring her the greatest pleasure.

As she makes her way back down the crowded, wintry mountain to her guild, Yoyote reflects that it is not easy to do business at all. She holds her Kadoatie close and gives thanks for the existence of the Igloo Garage Sale. Few Neopets are willing, indeed, to work as hard as Mika and Carassa do, to make Terror Mountain a lovelier place.

There is quite possibly no place warmer than Terror Mountain.

Well, except for her guild.