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The Key to a Slorg-Free Home


by mo0moo

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Do the words “eww”, “gross”, or “disgusting” come across your mind every time you enter your Neogarden? Do you notice a revolting slime trail all around your Neohome? Chances are, your lovely garden or cozy home may be infested by Slorgs! These little guys feast on your favorite plants, chew holes in your floors, and leave annoying slime trails that can produce mold. Don’t panic; you’re not the only one with this common problem. Read on to find out how you can protect you garden – and yourself- from these slimy pests.

PROTECT YOURSELF

Protecting yourself from Slorgs is very important. You don’t want any of that disgusting green slime getting on you, do you? Fortunately, you can take a few simple steps to keep yourself safe from Slorgs.

Clothing

What you wear in the garden is very important. Whenever you work in your garden, or decide to simply take a stroll in it, equip yourself with a wide-brimmed sun hat. This will come in handy in case Slorgs fall from trees, or possibly even the sky, onto your head. Next, wear a long-sleeved shirt, heavy-duty long pants, and strong boots. Tuck your pants into your boots so no Slorgs can crawl into your shoes and fester on your feet.

In the Home

Slorgs can occasionally get into your Neohome. This presents a big problem, for they can quickly infest your whole house. To prevent this, simply check yourself and your Neopets every time you or they enter your home from the garden (or anywhere outdoors). Make sure there are no pests on you or your pets. Be careful, Slorgs are known to be sneaky and can attach to you in hard-to-see places, like between your toes, behind your ear, etc. Check yourself and your pets carefully and thoroughly before entering your home.

Try spraying diluted Slorg-B-Gone on your furniture, rugs, and on the walls. It’s odorless and stainless, so it won’t leave a mark on your things. It will keep Slorgs away from your belongings.

Also, keep doors closed. Open doors are an invitation for Slorgs to crawl in and invade your home. Yech!

YOUR GARDEN

Wondering how you can protect your garden from infestation? The solution is simple, but it may take a while until you see results. Here’s what to do:

1. Slorg-B-Gone

Slorg-B-Gone is an effective way to rid your garden of slorgs. Simply shoot the stuff out at them and they will wither away! Hurrah!

2. Clean Up

Don’t leave piles of leaves or other debris on your lawn – or anywhere else, for that matter. Slorgs love damp places and will curl up in a pile of rotting leaves, trash, or anything moist and make themselves right at home. The simple solution is to throw all trash, leaves, dung, etc. in the proper receptacles. Don’t procrastinate this task at all; Slorgs can be attracted to such a pile from all directions in a matter of minutes.

3. Protect your Plants

Your plants are the most important things in your Neogarden, no? Because of this, you must be extra-careful when it comes to Slorgs. These critters just love chewing up your prize rose bush or your favorite Fire Bush. Luckily, there are plants Slorgs will stay away from, and you can use them to your advantage. For example, under no circumstances will a Slorg come within a 10 inch diameter of an Atrabud (the reason is much too complicated to explain here). By encircling your best plants with Atrabuds, you can keep the Slorgs away. There are other plants that Slorgs tend to stay away from, and if you do your research, you can come up with a wide variety of plants to surround your garden with. Such plants can often work to your advantage and look nice while doing their job. What else could you ask for?

Though this may not always be the most attractive way to set up your garden, it is certainly one of the easiest, cheapest, and most effective ways to keep the Slorgs away.

If this idea does not appeal to you, never fear! There are plenty of other ways you can keep those slimy buggers away from your prized plants. You can always do a weekly Slorg-B-Gone round in your garden. Shoot the repellent around the plants you wish to protect, and it will keep them away for up to a full week.

Tips on Removing Slorg Populations

If you have tried every method listed above, and yet you still see little Slorgs oozing amuck, you most likely have a very serious infestation, and it’s time you resort to desperate measures. Such measures include physically picking up and disposing of the icky beasties – eww! Here, I will try my best to explain several ways you can come about doing so without quite so much of the unnecessary “ick-ness” factor.

1. Trace the Source

Before you begin, you must locate the Slorg nest you wish to be rid of. The average Neohome can be host to 3 – 8 Slorg nests! Not fun. Locating the nest will take some substantial work on your part. Nests are usually found under leaf piles or in the dirt – generally moist, shady areas. Because Slorgs are most active at night, equip yourself with a good flashlight or possibly even night-vision goggles. When night falls, look for tell-tale Slorg trails. Fresh trails usually last for about 15 minutes before they disappear. Follow the trail until you find the source – often the nest. Jackpot! However, this may take several tries – Slorgs are slow movers, and half the trail may have already disappeared before you even get there. Act quickly, and persevere! You’ll find one by dawn, hopefully.

2. Invest in a heavy-duty shovel and dig!

Hop on down to your closest gardening center store and pick up the best shovel you can possibly find – when I say heavy-duty, I MEAN heavy duty. Yeah, you might end up spending a large chunk of neopoints, but Slorg ooze has been known to disintegrate normal metal shovels. You wouldn’t want that to happen, do you? Once you have purchased a satisfactory shovel, wait until night-time before beginning your job. Once it’s completely dark, hurry along to the Slorg nest you have previously located. Be sure to bring a large bin with you. Take your shovel and clear the area of leaves, dirt, or other debris. You will find a large dirt mound that looks like a giant wart. Carefully begin digging from the top until you reach the nest! You know you have found the nest when you reach a large, hollow, underground chamber. You will probably be digging for a few hours before you reach the chamber – it’s several feet underground. Pour a little bit of water into the hole, wait a few minutes, and soon enough, you’ll see hundreds of Slorgs swarming out of their hiding places. Scoop them out with care and place them in the bin. Continue working until the flood of Slorgs stops and you have cleared the chamber of these creatures. Close the bin tightly, and put the dirt you dug up back into the hole. Call the nearest Petpet Protection League (PPL) branch in the morning, and they will come collect your beauties. Let’s just hope the Slorgs haven’t chewed their way out by then.

In conclusion, Slorgs can be a problem around your house and garden, and the best ways to prevent them from attacking have all been described. If you have tried everything above, and still to no avail, then, too bad for you, I guess. You’re probably destined to deal with Slorgs for the rest of your life. But hey, that can’t be too much of a bad thing! People actually keep those things as petpets! But that’s a different story. I wish you all the best of luck in eliminating your slime-covered woes!

 
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