Day of the Meepit - How Their Plan Was Almost Foiled

     Assembled in crowds in Platform Nine, the cadets exchanged excited whispers. What could be happening? Could someone have been captured? Had the plot been found out? Impossible! the Meepits said. Impossible for the plot to have been discovered, not when every last caution had been deployed to keep it a secret! No, something must have happened, others argued. To only call on the cadets for inspection meant that someone had squealed! The painted Meepits had been sworn to secrecy; they could not have told! The whispers hushed into silence as the commander appeared on the thickest root and glared over the assembled Meepits. Behind him, the five most respected trainers of the army sat, waiting to hear the news. The commander cleared his throat and began.

     “The revolution has been postponed,” said the commander, his voice a deep icy calm. Chaos broke out among the cadets and shock was slapped across the faces of the trainers. Apparently they hadn’t known either. The commander continued without pausing. “There’s been a leak.”

     Every last Meepit in the crowd froze, and after a single second of absolute quiet, one Meepit turned to his companion and said, “Told you.”

     Those words seemed to set of a spark that would ignite a bomb, and the crowd erupted into questions and gossip.

     “A leak? You mean someone told?”

     “No way!”

     “Where is he? Find him and strip his sorry hide!”

     “Why now?! The date is two days away!”

     “Well, what do you think? If the Neopian reporters find out, it’ll be all over Neopia by tomorrow!”

     “Silence!” bellowed the commander. The room hushed instantly. “Now, we do not know who the traitor among us is, but only that he is one of you. That is why this inspection has been called. Any Meepit absent in his duties or missing will be found and questioned, and possibly tortured. So I hope for your sake that you’ve all been here for the past few days.” He grinned evilly. One of the council members, a spotted Meepit, slowly raised his hand. The commander whirled to face him. “Yes?”

     The Meepit cleared his throat nervously. “Are there any indications as to which department the traitor belongs to?”

     The commander sneered. “It’s most likely in the information department. But just because we’re not sure, the inspection goes to all cadets.” He said as if it were obvious. The spotted Meepit lowered his paw in an embarrassed way. The information department cadets looked around at each other and glared at staring companions.

     A red Meepit with small glasses perched on the edge of her nose raised her paw and stood up. “But if one of the cadets has told the Neopians, why haven’t they tried to re-capture us yet?” Several cadets echoed her question. The commander looked as if he were about to throw a very sharp object at the red Meepit, as his face kept flicking between masked rage to uncontrolled fury.

     “Why haven’t they tried to recapture us yet?” he repeated quietly. The red Meepit quickly sat down and the cadets stopped mumbling. Things were about to get good.

     “Why haven’t they tried to recapture us yet?!” he screamed, his voice hoarse with unsuppressed rage. “Because they can’t find us, that’s why! Whoever told is back here with us, and they have been communicating with other petpets that can talk to the Neopians to give them the information! If they had just waltzed up to the civilization and said, ‘Hi, you don’t know this, but the Meepits are preparing to attack and take over the world’, then every last camp would have been uprooted and its troops put back in petpet shops long ago! That’s why! What kind of no-good doodoo-headed Meepit are you, not to know something like that?! How in the emo-Usuki did you become a trainer?! Why I outta demote back to cadet, strip you of your color, and put you in the worst department imaginable--the Dung department!!!”

     Laughter broke out among the cadets and the other trainers giggled. The commander was still yelling at the unfortunate red Meepit when suddenly the intercom system flared to life. The alarm blared out a warning as a Meepit's voice, squeaky and fast, gave out the message:

     “Traitor identified, traitor identified!!!!! Section 132, code number of A63-ADD. Information department!”

     Immediately, the commander Meepit released his strangle hold on the red trainer and snatched up the intercom, shouting into it so that the Meepit on the other end was heard to fall over.

     “Boy or Girl?!” he roared. The red trainer’s glasses cracked. The intercom Meepit winced on the other end and quickly answered him.

     “Boy! He’s a boy!”

     Whirling around, the Meepit commander dropped the intercom and charged into the ranks of cadet Meepits, who cried out in alarm as they were pitilessly tossed aside as the commander Meepit tore through them. Pink Meepits flew through the air, falling in a heap on top of other cadets and creating absolute chaos. Over the still active intercom, the reporting Meepit sighed.

     “Sir, did you take your medicine today?” he asked. The commander didn’t hear him. He was too busy throwing cadets everywhere.

     “Where are you?!” he roared, flashing his sharpened teeth and flinging a hapless technology cadet aside. “Where are you, you blasted back-stabbing coward?!”

     Amid the confusion, wailing Meepits, crackling intercom, and insane commander, no one noticed one small Meepit, branded as a boy in the information center, with the bold black numbering of A63-ADD, slip through the crowd and go scurrying up to the emergency elevator shaft. The commander, however, heard that annoying (and potentially plot-ruining), insignificant little ping sound that elevators make when they open. Bowling through another rank of cadet Meepits, he charged at the elevator door. A63-ADD’s eyes stretched wide and he hurriedly pressed at the ‘close door’ button on the machine. The doors dinged closed at the last second, leaving the commander to run into them at full speed and tumble backwards.

     “Get him!!!” he shouted to the trainers, although the way he was holding his sore nose made it sound like he was saying something along the lines of, “Kis ‘im!!!”. The trainers hesitated for a second, wondering if their commander had finally snapped.

     “Now!” he bellowed, pointing to the stairway leading up from the Platform. “Cow!”

     The trainers decided that he must have meant for them to chase him, which was a good move on their part. Leaping down from the root where they had been seated, they crowded the entrance to the stairway, all trying to be the first one through at once.

     Getting to his feet, the commander let go of his throbbing shnozz and barreled through the mass of trainers and started up the stairway.

     “Get outta my way, you idiot!” he snapped at them. “If you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself! Now come on!” he said, scampering up the stairs as fast as his little legs could carry him, the trainers hot on his heels.

     Meep! *** Meep!

     Bursting out of the elevator shaft, the little Meepit ran pell-mell through the corridors, pushing any Meepit who got in his way aside. His ascent was followed by several shouts of, “Hey!” and “Watch it!” and “You get back down here and apologize fer knocking me over like that, you little start-up!”

     “It’s upstart!” He threw over his shoulder to the rainbow Meepit. “Not start-up!”

     The Meepit paused and blinked. “Oh,” he said. And then it was, “Hey! Owch! What is with all you people today, huh?! I just filed that paperwork! Ug!” as the commander and trainers sent him spinning again as they rushed past.

     “There he is!” bellowed the commander. “After him!”

     “We are, sir! Ow!”

     The trainer fell back down the long flight of stairs as the commander shoved him aside, finally coming to a rest at the entrance to Platform Nine, where the cadets wondered why he was babbling about someplace called ‘The Haunted Haven’.

     Meep! *** Meep!

     A63-ADD came to an abrupt halt and gasped at the dizzying height at the top of the tree.

     He didn’t like heights. He didn’t like heights at all.

     A63-ADD backed up a pace slowly, almost falling back over the wobbly railing again as the commander and trainers crashed through the double-wide swinging doors behind him, panting and sweaty.

     “There’s nowhere to run, cadet!” shouted the commander triumphantly. “Not unless you wanna take that jump! And even if ya do, you’ll just end up like you would with us anyway: Dead!”

     “Oh yeah?” A63-ADD (whose real name that he had decided upon was Charles) spun back around and jumped up on top of the railing, balancing on his paws. Sucking in a deep breath, he tried not to look down as he looked at the commander once more and hollered, “Just try and stop me!”

     And (surprise surprise) he jumped.

     “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” he screamed as he fell, down, down, down, down, down... until, finally—

     CRASH!!!! SNAP!!!! FWOOM!!!

     The trainers let out a group “Oooh!!!” and covered their eyes as the bush the diving Charles had crashed into groaned. The commander searched the foliage, now broken and somewhat smushed, for any sign that the cadet had survived.

     “Feepits!” he shouted, making the trainers jump, as he saw the pink, twig-covered form of Charles crawl out of the bushes.

     Grinning, the cadet turned and mockingly saluted the enraged red-faced commander Meepit and set off jauntily through the trees, heading towards the Haunted Woods. He had contact with a few petpets there, who had informed their pets who had informed their creator of the Meepits plot. He was feeling really good about himself; that was, until behind him he heard the secret entrance to the tree open and the commander say, “Get him!!!”

     With a startled squeak, Charles took off running, ducking and dodging the sharp pointy things that were thrown at him.

     Meep! *** Meep!

     And so, here I am, sitting in a dungeon, waiting to be atomatized, writing this down on a scrap of paper. Well, Charles made it to my house, all right, and he had just finished telling me everything (I speak Meepit, ya know) when they blew the door to my house open and arrested us all. My pets are in separate dungeons, each taking turns shouting about injustice and Feepits and how they refuse to act as battleships when the Meepits launch their attack on Neopia tomorrow morning. Charles the Meepit was never found; don’t know where he ran off to. Probably went to go bother somebody else about the invasion, though by the time he can convince anybody about it it’ll probably be too late. The little commander dude says they might not atomatize me; instead they’ll use my slick tongue and Neopian Writer influence to convince the other members of the guild I’m in to join their cause. I haven’t told them yet, but there’s already a certain member who would love to join them. I’m not certain if she already has or not, actually. But even though my pets are going to be used as battleships, the petpets and the Meepits pack mules, and I’ll probably be atomatized anyway, to my friends at the Haunted Haven, if you ever get a chance to read this, I have only one thing to say-

     IF YOU CAN’T FIGHT BACK, THEN RUN AWAY!!! RUN FAR AWAY (and make sure a certain Meepit-loving someone doesn’t do anything drastic) AND WARN EVERYONE!!!! THE MEEPITS ARE COMING, THE MEEPITS ARE COM-

     Zap!

     ...

     Dear Members of the Haunted Haven Guild,

     This was just about the last thing your former member, now one of us, lindortruffle had to say. We added that last ‘zap’ part, if you can’t guess, for how could she write it if she had just been turned into a Meepit? But wait... then how am I writing this??? Oh, well, who knows, who cares! And anyway, I do hope you will come to see the wisest choice and join us, or else face the consequences. Your guild has been left untouched by our forces so far, but refuse and you shall all very swiftly be dealt with. It would be a shame to lose such interesting members of our army: Part Zomutt, a Werelupe, Child of the Reaper, a cyodrake-vampire, and so on (we probed her brain before we were done)! If you would like to enjoy staying like that, then meet me at the Brain Tree at the end of the world in about three hours. I hope we can come to some agreement, for your sakes.

     ~Sincerely yours,

     Florence, The Meepit Commander

((No meepits were harmed in the making of this letter. Not including Truffle, who is now a meepit. o_0 ))

The End