White Weewoos don't exist. *shifty eyes* Circulation: 144,656,803 Issue: 304 | 10th day of Hiding, Y9
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P.B.P.C. - The Silent Epidemic


by gracie827

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Most Neopians will agree that a painted pet is a happier and generally better looking pet. (Although, I am sure many Unis would argue that they are better looking no matter what color they are painted.) However, there is a hidden and widely spreading topic being kept from users who wish to paint their pets. It is known as the "Paint Brush Personality Complex". Now you may be asking yourself, "Why have I never heard of Paint Brush Personality Complex?", also known as P.B.P.C. to the physicians at the Neopian Hospital. And the answer is quite simple. It is unpredictable, and most pets are in denial that they even suffer from it.

The basic summary of this disease is that it brings out the more annoying and generally frustrating qualities of the color that the pet is painted. For example, a large number of P.B.P.C. cases have come from Royal Paint Brush recipients. Reported symptoms of this paint color are as follows: diva-like behavior from the females, the quest for power from the males, and general temper tantrums from both genders. These pets have begun to take advantage of the fact that they are royal and demand to be treated as such in every way. I was able to talk to a user who wishes to remain anonymous to protect the reputation of his royal pet.

However, he did tell me, "My royal Lupe has become more and more demanding each day. He truly is becoming a tyrant as a result of the Royal Paint Brush. Yesterday, his Warf lost in the Petpet Battledome and my Lupe demanded the opponent be thrown in his room which he refers to as the "dungeon". (Luckily I was able to persuade him that doing such a thing would not sit well with his subjects.) Yes, I have been reduced to playing along with his King-like antics. I am afraid he may have me thrown in a dungeon if I fail to buy him new toys or feed him gourmet food."

As disturbing as this is, there are far worse cases out there that further prove how rampant P.B.P.C. has become. A user who owns a pirate Poogle said, "I am constantly having to fill in holes that are dug in my backyard. My Poogle is determined that the Buried Treasure jackpot is hidden in our backyard. I can no longer have guests over either. Just last week she made one of our guests swab the kitchen floor, and then she tried to make the guest walk the plank due to a poor swabbing job. I can't deal with much more of this. I think it is time for professional help."

Users who think their pet may be suffering from this horrible disease will be glad to know that indeed there are great strides being made to find a cure. Dr. Lania Lenny is the leading scientist working in the Painted Patient wing at the Neopian Hospital. She feels very optimistic about new techniques and medicines that are being tested.

"We have noticed a significant change in pets who are suffering from P.B.P.C. that have been taking medicine such as the Realityn Checka pill or the Egorius Minimus syrup. For instance, a Tyrannian Quiggle that was diagnosed with P.B.P.C. had extreme symptoms. His owner reported cave drawings covering furniture, walls, and even his petpet. The Quiggle also liked to bring rocks indoors to smash and cook giant omelettes in the kitchen at odd hours. After a few days of medicine under close observation, this pet is now excited to explore the Lost Desert, play with his toys, and make new friends. We are very excited about our progress."

As exciting as these results are, medicine and other possible treatments are still in the experimental stages and therefore are not readily available to the general Neopian populace. However, Dr. Lania has suggestions and tips for owners who fear their pet may be suffering from the painting sickness.

"Owners should try and remind the pet that he or she is loved no matter what color they happen to be painted. Some of the happiest pets are those that are a simple yellow or green. Also, sometimes it helps lessen the P.B.P.C. behavior if positive distractions and activities are provided. For example, enrolling pets in the Swashbuckling Academy can help channel a pets energy into focusing on growing stronger, faster, or better overall. Petpets or other pets are also good, positive distractions. Sometimes, the suffering pet will be able to see a good example of a well-behaved pet with an addition to the family. The suffering pet will also have someone to play, talk, and laugh with. (It should be noted, that a small percentage of pets will see the introduction of another pet or petpet as a threat. This is seen most frequently in the mutant and royal painted pets. The mutant pets might think of the newly introduced pet as a chew toy, while the royal pets may begin to boss the new family member around as a butler, maid, or lady in waiting)."

Dr. Lania and the other scientists working on the research of this disease assure everyone that there are very few extreme cases of P.B.P.C. known. Most pets will only suffer from the disease for the first few weeks after visiting the Rainbow Pool, Lab Ray, or drinking morphing potion. Some good news, as well, is that none of the cases are uncurable.

"Every pet can be cured of P.B.P.C. It is only a matter of how serious the case to determine how long the pet may be sick," Dr. Lania says. "Whether they are taken to our ward of the hospital for treatment or are just given some home remedies, there is always a 100% recovery rate."

Owners should continue to keep loving their pets in spite of the P.B.P.C. Sometimes all it takes is a little extra tender loving care for a pet to realize he or she does not need to act out to be loved and given attention.

 
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