Now with 50% more useless text Circulation: 141,362,208 Issue: 295 | 8th day of Relaxing, Y9
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A Series of Suspicious Events: The Meepit-Domination


by concertogreat_8

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My suspicions started the day my annoying Meepit, Graciella, started acting strangely. Now, I know Meepits always act strangely. From the day my well-meaning mother, Lorraine, brought her home (“Chloe, you’ll never believe what I found all alone in the petpet shop!”), Graciella has been totally strange. Especially the way she stares at everyone with those creepy black eyes. And besides, Meepits are evil: they’re planning to take over the world. Who wants a petpet that is planning to re-populate Neopia with hundreds of tiny pink things?

     Anyway, today, Grace was even odder than usual. I was sitting at my desk, doing homework, when I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I snuck a glance at Graciella, who was sitting by the window. Sure enough, she was staring straight at me, most likely planning the owner-eradication stage in the Meepit-Domination Plan, which, as everyone knows, is the Meepits’ plan to take over Neopia. I watched her suspiciously. Suddenly, she sprang up onto the window sill. “Hey!” I yelled, because the window was open, and I didn’t trust the creepy little thing not to run off. Sure enough, with a quick glance at me, Graciella leaped through the window and was off. I stared. What would Lorraine say?

     Fortunately, Graciella showed back up right before dinner time, grinning smugly. Meepits, grinning? You ask. Yes, absolutely. I glared suspiciously at her, and she looked innocently back. My older rainbow Uni sister Sorrel’s mind-numbingly boring puppyblew stared straight ahead, not appearing to notice anything as Lorraine set the bowls of petpet food down. Well, I for one was onto that Meepit.

     The next day, I watched Graciella closely. She also seemed to have that plan, as she kept a large, black eye on me herself.

     “Stop looking at me,” she squeaked, after I had won one such staring contest. I stared (again) in surprise. Talking Meepits? Perhaps I had found the key to the Meepit-Domination plan. As far as I knew, other petpets didn’t talk.

     By noon, I had discovered that Said Suspicious Subject spent a great deal of time watching the finches outside, definitely weird behavior, and that she kept a large supply of burnt-out light bulbs under the kitchen sink. Probably for weaponry, I guessed.

     “What in Neopia are you doing?” Sorrel asked when she found me in the airing cupboard, peering through the slates at Graciella, who was staring intently at a patch of wall. Maybe a secret cache, used to store weapons and battle plans.

     “I’m watching Graciella,” I said. “She is plotting to take over the world.”

     Sorrel rolled her eyes, took her towel in her hooves (am I ever glad I’m a Kougra), and left. Silly Sorrel, she has no idea of my ingenious way to stop the Meepit-Domination Plan.

     Since the site had become too crowded for proper observance, I went up to my room to fetch my binoculars and from there out the window into the cherry tree, whose branches leaned over to provide easy transportation from one place to the next. I also took my notebook, to record suspicious behavior.

     I settled myself comfortably in a fork, and sat down to watch. I wrote in my notebook while I waited.

     3:20 pm.

     Suspect not showing up, room deserted. Birds are in this tree.

     3:22 pm.

     Suspect still not here, I’m hungry. Birds are becoming annoying.

     3:30

     Boring. Not even birds are in this tree anymore.

     3:39

     Same as above.

     3:47

     The neighbors are talking. Perhaps they are in on the Meepit-Domination Plan.

     3:49

     No, they have nothing to do with MDP; it’s just about the broken lawnmower.

     3:52

     Bored. No sign of anyone.

     3:53

     Where is everyone?

     A noise startled me so that I almost dropped my notebook and pencil. I grabbed my binoculars just as my bedroom door creaked open. Aha! Now I would catch the culprit red-handed. Unfortunately, it turned out to be only Lorraine, coming in with fresh socks. Blast it. I wasn’t sure if this counted as suspicious behavior, but I recorded it in my notebook anyway.

     3:25 pm.

     Lorraine comes in. With socks.

     I was getting quite stiff and cramped by the time the door slid open again. I froze immediately, however, because a good spy never moves. Sure enough, Graciella slipped into the room. She glanced around, sniffing the air and looking carefully for any sign of population. She even checked the closet and under the bedclothes. That Meepit was good. However, not good enough for me. I watched through my binoculars as Graciella took a flying leap onto my desk. She then began to rifle through my papers. My papers! This had to be stopped.

     I dropped my binoculars so that they swung from the cord around my neck, and then scrambled onto the branch that leaned out to my window. I slid the window open and jumped in, yelling my famous Caught-the-Culprit yell. Graciella squeaked and ran for the door, but I was quicker. “Not so fast, Plotter!” I cried. I leaped to the door and slammed it shut.

     Graciella blinked. I had foiled her plan, ha-ha!

     “Let me out,” she said, sounding annoyed.

     “Not until you satisfy my interrogation,” I told her. I had to handle this professionally.

     “Okay. I looked through your schoolwork, to see how bright you are, and if you’re qualified to take care of me. You’re not; so what else is new?”

     I gaped at her. Me, not qualified?! “Now listen here, you World-Dominator!” I began. But Lorraine yelled at the same time: “Chloe, get down here this instant!” in her I-mean-it tone.

     I had no choice. I gave The Subject one last threatening look, and left.

     I had no choice but to abandon further inspection over the next few days, as the weekend was over. However, the first chance I got, I was back to watching that Meepit. On Tuesday afternoon, around three o’clock, Grace left through the petpet door. I, equipped with food, compass, water, binoculars, and notebook, followed. I stayed some distance behind my pet as I followed her through the neighborhood. Graciella dodged under bushes and behind trees, and generally zigzagged all over, so that I had a hard time keeping up. I knew that she was doing the smart thing to avoid spies. But not me.

     Finally, Graciella stopped abruptly. We were in a tiny alley-way, a couple blocks from my house. I ducked behind a crumbling wall as the Meepit looked all around. After a minute, she decided that no one was there (shows what she knew) and immediately scampered into a drain pipe. Drat. I wasn’t small enough to fit into any sort of pipe, except maybe a sewer pipe. This one looked more like one of those tiny metal ones that drain rain water.

     With a sigh, I slowly crawled up to the pipe and sat down on the left side of it. I guessed that the safe part of the pipe, where Graciella undoubtedly was, was fairly short, a couple feet at the most. Therefore, I would be able to hear most of whatever was going on if I put my ear to it. I did this, although it was very muddy and quite disgusting. Inside, I could hear murmuring. I gasped. Graciella was attending a secret meeting! Probably the last one, to make sure everything was in place before they took over the world.

     “Hello,” I heard a squeaky voice say. It sounded decidedly Meepit-ish.

     Hello? Was that how they started their meetings? I expected something far more official. ‘Welcome to the last Meepit-Domination Plan meeting, is everyone present?’ seemed fitting.

     “How’re you today?” I heard. I blinked. This meeting sounded totally relaxed. I’d imagined a far more up-tight atmosphere.

     “Great, except my nosy owner keeps stalking me. She is such a pain.”

     I opened my mouth in indignation when I heard Graciella’s unmistakable voice. How dare she call me ‘such a pain’?!

     “We’re misunderstood,” chimed in another voice. Aha, so the meeting was really starting! Clever of them, to be so informal about it. Probably so that anyone who accidentally overheard wouldn’t think anything of it; I knew better.

     “Yeah, we have to hide when all we want to do is have a little talk,” the second voice complained. It was my turn to be confused. All they wanted to do was talk? I must have stumbled in on the wrong meeting.

     I stayed another ten or so minutes, until it started to rain. In that time, I learned that one of the Meepits was going to be painted tomorrow, one of them had an achy back and an owner who did nothing about it, and that they would meet again next week. What a bore and a waste of time! Not to mention that my lovely red fur was soaking wet.

     I trudged home through the rain, to find a very puzzled Lorraine waiting for me, as well as Graciella, who was drying off by the fire. I gave her an evil glare as Lorraine handed me a towel and went to make hot chocolate. Next time, I was going to find the real headquarters of the Meepit-Domination Plan, and then I would have them. Oh, yes, I would.

The End

 
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