Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 137,350,242 Issue: 277 | 2nd day of Awakening, Y9
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The Woos and Woes of a Winged Neopet


by rainbow2skittle

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Come on, admit it - we’ve all thought about it. At least once or twice in our lives we have dreamt about flying. And why not? The breathtaking feeling of soaring over layers of fluffy white clouds is bound to capture some of our imaginations. But it’s not all as admirable as it may look! In this article, I will give you a complete rundown on the woos and woes of being a winged neopet (or the pros and cons, but woos and woes sound much more fancy). Because there are oh-so many good and bad things about being a winged neopet, I have narrowed them down to the top four.

First of all, who are these winged neopets we’re talking about? Well, luckily for you I have spared a few hours (unfortunately I was never good at Math) of my time and made a list of all the winged neopets of Neopia! I’ve even made listed them alphabetically for your convenience. ;)

They are the Buzz, Draik, Eyrie, Hissi, Korbat, Lenny, Pteri, Scorchio, Shoyru, Skeith and Uni.

In total there are currently 11 (arguably 10) out of 54 pets that have wings. (It is ‘arguably 10’ since the Skeith’s wings are approximately one-tenth of its total body weight instead of the recommended healthy one-third and some would not count them as proper wings). That is roughly 20%, or one-fifth, of all the species of neopets that have wings, to be precise. Too many? Not enough? Only you can be the judge. Now, enough prattling and let’s get to business! The top four woos and woes of a winged neopet are...

#1 WOO: The most obvious upside of having wings is that you look great and you know it! Say goodbye to those old, tacky accessories such as the scarf, jeweled collar or the hat... those versatile, pampered wings of yours are your new ultimate accessory that are bound to make your friends green with envy. Go and show them off!

#1 WOE: Every woo must have their woe – and, can you believe that this one does too. Despite the beauty that a pair of wings may portray on a pet, they are difficult to keep up with. Okay, enough with the fancy talk – wings are HIGH MAINTENANCE! All the time-consuming grooming, preening, brushing and bathing are bound to make anyone crazy! Not to mention, they are rather heavy on the wallet, too.

#2 WOO: Walking, riding, bouncing, running or skating to school? Pfft ...that is so old! Ditch that bike, skateboard, pogo stick or pair of old smelly runners because it is now officially hip to fly to school! Now you will never have to worry about being late to school again or having painfully sore, blister-covered feet. Is it too good to be true?

#2 WOE: Yes, unfortunately it is. :( It is too good to be true! Whatever happened to chatting to your close-knit group of friends while trekking to school together, hmm? Come on – chances are that you have friends who don’t have wings and would prefer to travel to school the old-fashioned way. So what are you going to do? Unless you’re a selfish, egotistical pet who actually has no friends when you think you have more than enough of them – go ahead and fly to school on your own – that should give you enough time to think about how silly you really are! *Ahem* Sorry, I just had to get that off my chest. (:

#3 WOO: This is an arguable fact that most already know – with wings comes popularity! Investigate for yourself... for example, isn’t it a fact that the Shoyru is the most popular pet in Neopia? Sure, there’s the infectious little grin, the cute horn bit on the head, but the wings – I mean, just look at the wings! Need I say more?

#3 WOE: Now, whoever said popularity was a good thing? Ask any winged celebrity today and most likely they will answer “I’m tired of the fame” or “sure, they like my wings but they don’t know me.” And speaking of celebrities, take a closer look at them! I think you might find quite a surprise. Most of them don’t have wings at all! Examples are Jeran, Hannah, Kauvara, Brucey B, Isca and Caylis, Edna, Nightsteed, Tomos, Sophie the swamp witch, Nabile, Prince Jazan, Eliv Thade just to name a few. Virtually all of them are famous for what they have done or achieved, not whether they have a nice pair of wings or not.

#4 WOO: Want to get out of something? A trip to the shops, a family outing or even Neo-school? If the old ‘tummy ache’ trick doesn’t work, have I got the solution for you! Next time you don’t feel like going out, try telling your owner that your wings are aching. A bit of sulking and glassy eyes won’t hurt either. ;) Also, remember to say no when your owner asks if you want to see the doctor (you can only go so far). Trust me; it should work like a charm.

#4 WOE: Okay, this woe has to be my favourite. :P When you actually do want to play games with your friends or family... ever heard of the game Kacheek Seek? (If you haven’t, you must be some alien neopet from outer space). Honestly, those huge flapping wings are an instant giveaway! So in reality, it is a woo for pets without wings which doesn’t really make it a woe after all. Heh, confusing, I know.

Finally, in conclusion, although winged neopets may look spiffy, they’re not all as great as you thought! They are just like you and me – mere mortals (Kyrii and Lennies included). Be happy with what you have and who you are! Everyone is different and unique, so you might as well embrace it! ^^ (And if that doesn’t work out, there’s always something called the Darigan or Faerie paint brush if you have a few million neopoints to spare – an instant means of flight... just kidding)! xD Thanks for reading this article - till next time, my friends! :)

 
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