 Fire Pets: Care and Myths
by kittyfjeld
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Maybe you've seen them before. You walk down the street shopping for whatever
you need, and there's one right in front of you. Maybe he's eating a Fiery Flames
Ice Lolly, or maybe he's just minding his own business. You are struck with a
number of emotions and empathy, his pride and your own fear. We all know that
feeling, and more often than not you feel tempted to call the fire department.
But these cuddly little balls of ash and fire aren't anything to be afraid of!
If you know the right way to care for a Fire Pet, you'll be rewarded with love
and luxury, not to mention a free source of heat in the winter. These pets are
Fire Pets, and I'm here with my pet, Critter_baby, to talk a little about Care
of Fire Pets, Finding Fire Pets, and some popular Myths about them.
Critter_baby: Howdy. I'm a Fire Wocky. My owner, Kitty, had me painted a few
months ago.
Kitty: Let's get started! First of all, how do you get a hold of these little
bundles of fire-hazards?
Critter_baby: It's easy. You can either adopt from the pound, or more realistically,
you could buy a Fire, Fire, Your Pants on Fire paintbrush from the trading post
or auction. You can't really buy that well from the shop wizard due to the item's
rarity. You also get a better deal from the auctions and trades. I got painted
Fire when Kitty lucked out at the Fruit Machine.
Kitty: It's true. You can win all sorts of paintbrushes from the Fruit Machine
if you always play every day. I first won a Starry Paintbrush and painted my
Kougra, SweetieBaby593.
SweetieBaby593: Hiya! *waves*
Kitty: Moving right along. How does one care for a Fire Pet?
Critter_Baby: Water is a definite no. It damages our fur like acid, and we
all know what happens when your skin falls off. Well, you at least know it isn't
good, right?
Kitty: It's also healthy to maintain those lovely coats. If your pet looks
bad, it'll feel bad. Buy flammable liquids and every now and then put some on
your pet. Your house won't catch on fire if you do so in small amounts, and
your Fire pet will love you forever. It's the best way to groom them, seeing
as how shampoos and combs melt on contact. But be sure to keep them away from
flammable household objects otherwise, though. I've lost two sofas and a table
to him, and now he's restricted to flameproof jelly furniture.
Critter_Baby: At least it's comfy.
Kitty: Your Fire Pet's diet should consist of warm to hot foods, and you should
never give them anything too cold. Be sure that they're kept in a warm place
with plenty of air available. Too little air and heat makes your fire pet a
lifeless critter. No pun intended, Critter_baby.
Critter_baby: There was a joke in there?
Kitty: Should your pet ever get sick, call the hospital right away. Even if
they drop a few degrees it could be serious. Other danger signs could be a low
flame, more shedding of ashes, and occasional fiery hiccups (The less of these,
the better). In the meantime, crank up the heat and find some wood. Fire pets
sleep best and recuperate better when sleeping on a bed of logs. You can also
give them a normal bed, but be sure to fireproof it first. Otherwise you'll
have a big pile of ashes that the Fine Furniture place won't refund.
Critter_baby: The worst thing your fire pet can get is the Itchy-Scratchies.
Believe me, when you have embers flying everywhere you're bound to have something
on fire other than your Fire Pet.
Kitty: Remember, DON'T EVER BATHE YOUR FIRE PET! Even if they rolled in mud,
swam in sewage, and then sat in a dung sofa, baths are a death sentence. Besides,
a little mud never hurt anyone!
Critter_baby: Next, the popular myths about Fire Pets. Myth number one- Fire
pets shed flames onto everything around them. This isn't true. While it is possible
for Fire Pets to launch fire, or spread it at will, we don't carelessly go about
burning things. Besides, projecting fire is like shedding your skin. It leaves
you feeling weak and tired. I wouldn't do that carelessly.
Kitty: Myth number two- Fire Pets cause house fires. Well, actually, yes. I
can't tell you how many times Critter_baby's set my house on fire.
Critter_baby: 679 times. *Sneeze*. Uh oh... Make that 680.
Kitty: Myth number three- Fire Pets are made completely out of fire. Not true!
Fire pets are just like every other Neopet on the inside, just much, much hotter.
On the outside, their fur is made out of fire, ash, and embers. But they are
definitely not made of fire!
Critter_baby: Myth number four- Fire Pets are not good with other pets. That's
a lie! I have a ton of friends.
Kitty: No, you don't. You live at home with two sisters and a brother. You
don't even go outside anymore.
Critter_baby: Well, I'm just too busy to make friends. I could if I wanted
to.
Kitty: Whatever. Our last myth, Myth number five, is that Fire Pets are evil.
Well, yes and no. Fire pets are born specially in volcanoes, and live extremely
long lives. They aren't fond of being woken up during their youth, which is
spent in their volcanoes, so they can be destructive at times. But as far as
Dr. Sloth vs. Fire Pets goes, he's got them beat hands down. So, while you may
find lava running through your backyard one day, Fire Pets are not all that
bad, considering that it could be a lot worse.
Critter_baby: The only reason fire pets even expose ourselves to the lives
of you is for entertainment. One day we will dominate the planet and you will
all be our slaves, lest we burn you all to ashes! Bwahahaha!
Kitty: That's enough out of you, mister! *throws bucket of water onto Critter_baby*
Critter_baby: Aah! It burns so!
Kitty: I told you they were harmless. Well, that's our report. Join us next
time for Caring for Starry Pets! And remember: Fire Pets are a handful, so keep
a close eye on them.
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