Where there's a Weewoo, there's a way Circulation: 127,792,023 Issue: 260 | 6th day of Collecting, Y8
Home | Archives Articles | Editorial | Short Stories | Comics | New Series | Continued Series
 

What Happened to the Grarrls, Eh?


by triss_ze_swordmaid

--------

Hello, I am Argentinios the soon-to-be-painted Maraquan Grarrl,

I have come to write this article because I am "concerned" about my species. I mean, have you seen the pound boards lately? Most of them are Grarrls! For example:

There are many boards with something like "Darigan Grarrl needs a home, no appz!!!"

Only to find out they called him "it", (yes the owner) and they were only pounding him just so they could get another pet, when he was the ONLY pet! No apps, no neomail, no rules no nothing! Just,

"i willz powd it if I find some1 gud! Mayb on p4 or p5 I dunno"

Oh! The pain! These people should be ashamed of themselves. Sorry if I sound rude, or unfair, but is it not the truth?

Let's face it; Grarrls have been going downhill ever since they were made. Ok, so we're not as cute as our fellow Lupes, (which have suddenly been on the increase, might I add) or even as cuddly as the Kougras.

HOWEVER, we are a great species and deserve to be treated with love and care like the rest of them. Don't get me wrong, I think Lupes are... "adaptable" shall we say. Kougras are very... um... "colourful". Yes.

So, why us? I have been gathering evidence and this is my conclusion:

BAD IMAGE.

Look at a Grarrl at first glance and what do you see? A great, big dinosaur with scary teeth. Am I right? We are always the ugly Neopet, the big scary Neopet, the one that will always eat those... tasty... delicious... neop- er... erm... skip the last part.

But personally, I love the look! It makes us... unique. Strong. Er... Grarrlish. I mean who wouldn't want a pet that could eat ANYTHING?

There have been stories, poems, comics, even pictures of Grarrls being mean or evil to helpless Neopians. Bah. I am a writer! Not a bully, for Sloth's sake.

What I'm getting at is that we have basically been the "villains" of Neopia. Neopets would scream and run away at the first mention of a Grarrl!

So in hope of writing this, I shall lead Grarrls into glory! Muhah, MUHAHAH! Ahem, getting myself a bit carried away. Next topic then, shall we?

WHAT YOU CAN DO

Help me get my fellow Grarrls the love and attention they deserve.

"How can I help?!!" I hear you ask! Just follow these simple steps:

1) NAME HIM/HER WELL

I swear, if I see another Grarrl whose name is something like: BiGupdinoMaN, OMG_THE_BIGKILLERZ or zer_Giant_1z I am going to scream. Please, please, PLEASE! If you are going to create a Grarrl name him/her something good. It doesn't have to be fantastic, just something original at least. Phew, got that off my chest.

2) POUND THEM WELL

If you are really desperate and going to pound your Grarrl, (which I certainly hope not) then the least you can do is pound him/her well fed and without illness. Can you guess where I was found? Yep. In the pound. I was starving, cold and had a bad case of the Sneezles. Sigh...

3) ADOPT SOME

If you don't want to create one, simply adopt one! Obviously... There are some really good stat Grarrls in there. Some even painted. You might be lucky...

4) DO SOMETHING

Ok, so you got your Grarrl; now what? The answer is... DO SOMETHING WITH HIM/HER! I have seen many accounts where all their pets have been either: roleplayed, drawn by Neopet artists, drawn by their owners, have got amazing pet pages, won contests, have really good stats or even all six. Except of course... the Grarrl. Nothing. Zero. Nought. Not even a tiny picture or 2 levels. It didn't even say: "pet page coming soon!" I mean, if your Grarrl might be new to your family... (Like me) then I might let you off, but even then it doesn't take even three minutes to write: "Petpage coming soon!" now does it? I mean, look what my owner is doing now! Letting me write this very article that you are reading right now.

5) PAINT JOB

Show me that you care! Paint him/her up nice! Do a little roleplay with him/her! (I'm getting very little response from my owner's roleplay Grarrl board.) Maybe even come chat with me?

6) TRAINING

Do we not make great training pets? I mean, doesn't it look weird that a Grarrl got beaten by a Kacheek!?!? Nonsense! That's what I say, that Grarrl was obviously going easy, or even... the match was a lie! Yes! That could be it... the Grarrl obviously won, but the Kacheek bribed them to put him as the winner! Oh! The insanity!

7) GIRLS NEEDED

Ok, have you noticed that there seems to be an endless supply of BOY Grarrls? I have never seen a female Grarrl in my life! Of course I wish to meet both boy and girl Grarrls, but preferably females. I have never met one, so it might be interesting. I mean the only females I have met so far are my owner, Triss, and Martha, my Cybunny friend who lives with me. So yeah, females definitely.

8) Ok, I am sort of running out of ideas now... guess it's time for me to stop ranting and onto the conclusion...

CONCLUSION

Fight for better named Grarrls! Fight for the roleplaying Grarrls! And last but not least, fight for me!!!

-cough- Argh... it's going to be a very long time before I do that again. Although you should know what you have to do now. I'll just recap again, though, just in case:

Name the Grarrls well, roleplay them, draw pictures of them, train them, more girl Grarrls, and whatever else I missed.

It's time I stopped writing now, my claws are getting tired, how on earth can you write with these fiddly things that you call, "pencils"? -rant rant- -moan moan-...

Ahem, well, that's it. Finish. End. Fin. Blah. Go home!

Signed,

Argentinios the ranting soon-to-be-painted-Maraquan Grarrl

P.S. This will not be the last time you will hear from me... Oh yes, there will be many more rants to come. Enjoy.

 
Search the Neopian Times




Great stories!


---------

Storm Center: Cyodrake's Gaze
Eye of the Storm is an extremely easy puzzle game, needing a bit of luck for some parts of it. You see, the Gaze is under one of the two hundred and forty tiles on the game board, along with its crew and a few special tiles thrown in just for fun. This guide will show you just how easy the game is, the different ways that you can play it, how you can win it and what does what.

by visorak_commander

---------

Lesser Faerie
'It wasn't me,' thought the air faerie. She stopped and hovered inside a bush, giving her heart time to stop pounding. 'It wasn't me...'

by tashni

---------

Cry for a Queen
What right had the rest of the world to be sunny, happy, or bright? How could the birds sing so freely when it was all she could do not to scream?

Also by laurelinden

by precious_katuch14


---------

And You're Covered in Paint Because?
The pant devil strikes again!!

by zhou_ying



Submit your stories, articles, and comics using the new submission form.