The Many Dialects of the Neopian World
“What?!? Dialects? Did you just say many dialects? Ha! Ha! Ha! You must be off
your rocker, buddy!” Yes, yes, I know that on the inside that is exactly what
you were saying, or something similar to that, or, well, I know you were thinking
something but that’s not the point! The point is that I have only one time to
teach you all the many, many dialects of the Neopian world, so listen closely,
and heed my words. Many times you can use these select dialects and get yourself
out of trouble by promoting a well known tribal friendliness.
The dialects of the Neopian languages are like the dialects of the big round
thing they call the “real world.” You will find many different ways to talk
and act in just one same language speaking region. There are many different
regions in Neopia and not only will I be teaching you those but the proper way
to act to.
Speaking: Just stay silent, for goodness sake! If you must speak, say something
that doesn’t give anything away. “Good Afternoon,” for example, is a good way
to say it if a greeting at all is necessary. But when you say it keep your voice
thick, cold and misty; don’t let your face show any emotion. If someone asks
you what you are doing, you either stare them down coldly, looking as if you're
giving no consideration to the thought, and walk away, or you can say, “I have
business in these woods,” and then walk away. This should get you out of a scrape
as they will respect you for your evilness. Bwa Ha Ha!
Acting: You must be filled with mystery and stay in the shadows; you are not
in a happy place, so don’t go around laughing and talking. The natives won’t
like that. Not at all…
Underwater Fishing Cavern
Ahh yes, a tiny little place with its own dialect!
Speaking: When you walk in, a proper greeting to all the fishermen would be
something along the lines of this: “Hey y’all, just passing through.” Except
you must pronounce it like this: “Heeey (say it real slow) y’all, jus piessin’
(pie-sin) thu-rew.” If you would like to ask, “Isn’t it a nice day,” you would
say, “Reckon it’s a nice day,” and if you want to know if the weather for fishing
is good you might say, “Reckon the fish is bitin’ taday.” The proper answers
to these questions are, “Yep, reckon it is,” and “Reckon they are.” It’s up
to you to add “Yep” or not. In keeping with the Reckon rule, state all questions
as a statement, just add reckon to it, same with the answers.
Manner: DO NOT BE FANCY AND UPTIGHT! Just keep it casual; if you come in with
such fancy clothing and deluxe fishing equipment and dignified language you
will make the natives do one of two things: laugh at you, talk about you, and
make fun of you all together, OR they will just be very uncomfortable around
you and try to make their habits more presentable. It is not good to change
them in such a way; their brains will not be able to handle it and then they
will get health problems; then they will be very, very sad 'cause they won’t
be able to fish. *silence* Yep, it’s true. *Silence* Oh no, it is, I promise.
*silence* I’m leaving!
Pirate Language is needed on this island. And I won't make this long because
come on? Who doesn’t know pirate? I’ll just say some uncommon ones.
Speaking: “Avast matey!” is the proper way to say “hello.” Or if you’re feeling
in a hurry or you’re feeling particularly mean you can just say “Yarr!” for
If you see someone you haven’t seen in a long while, or if you’re going to
a high school reunion on Krawk Island you would say, “Aye! Did ye not go to
the gallows?” meaning “I haven’t seen you in a long time.” For a goodbye you
simply say, “We sail together soon, mate.”
Manner: Be… loose. Act swanky and piratey. Like perhaps you’ve spent an hour
too long in a tavern… Be tough though and real “ooo… I’m so much richer and
stronger than you, HA HA, in your face.” That kind of act.
Virtupets Space Station
This language shouldn’t be hard; who doesn’t love Sloth?
Speaking: Now on the space station, they have pretty much the same dialect
as Neopia Central… Just one difference. You MUST always add “Sloth is my leader”
before EVERY sentence! This is where learning dialects comes in handy; many
a foreign neopet to Space Station was mutated for not adding that extra little
bit on Sloth. An example on how to say it would be like, “Sloth is my leader,
hello,” “Sloth is my leader, goodbye.” This means Hello and Goodbye (for all
the under-average pets out there). Now of course no one truly means this, but
you still must say it.
Manner: Act uptight; you never know when Sloth could appear. Also BEWARE THE
PICKPOCKETS! Pickpocketing crimes have increased an appalling 98% ever since
they released the “Lever of Doom” avatar. Pets and owners alike are stealing
NP so they may try their hand at getting that avatar. So you might want to carry
around a robot petpet to protect you.
Ahhh… This is a hard one here, though very fun. It is my favorite dialect as
a matter of fact. Still, you will have to look to your friends in Tyrannia with
help on this one, but I will tell you a few basic words.
Speaking: Uggh = Hello Pronounced ug-juh
Gal-aka-aka-bo! = How are you doing?
Nah-de! = Goodbye Pronounced: naw-d
Ahh-aka-aka-gal! = I’m doing great!
Gal-aka-fyaaaar! = I’m feeling miserable (or angry)
Plesio = Happy (or swim)
Grrarg = Angry (or fighter)
Myncha = Wise (or musician)
Tekel = Mischievous (or sly)
Sabre-X = Powerful (or leader)
Kyruggi = Old (or loyal)
But of course these prehistoric neopets do not form whole sentences; the sentence
would be: Uggh gal-aka-aka-bo! Plesio, which means “Hello! How are you? Would
you like to swim?” They basically just don’t do whole sentences.
Manner: Go back into the stone ages, literally! A wooden or stone club is a
must have to go along with that animal skin dress you made! Swing your arms
back and forth and walk hunched over; you’ll have a friend in no time!
This is a short easy one to learn; it is, though, a wee bit hard to get just
Speaking: Breathable air is roughly 89% of normal quality on this planet and
the way they talk reflects it. They talk slowly and evenly spaced out, drawing
breath after each word. Practice makes perfect with this dialect!
Manner: Gravity is currently 29% that of Neopia. Boing! Well, that pretty much
sums it up! Be… boingy.
Now this, of course, is just a little dialect I made up just for fun because
of course there is absolutely NO Jelly World. Nope. Not at all. Yep, that’s
it just a made up world and a made up dialogue.
Speaking: Now this is a bit difficult to get right; it takes a lot of practice!
You see Jelly Worldians are used to bouncing up and down all the time because
since they live in Jelly they’re always going up and down, up and down, up and
down… So naturally their voices are always shaking in that up and down way kind
of like “H-e-l-l-o,” except their voices go up and down in time with the jelly.
Even when they’re not in their made up world of jelly their voices still go
that way because that’s what they’re used to.
Manner: Just be normal but move up and down all the time like you're on jelly
and it's moving back and forth.
Now, I know this is not all of the dialects of the Neopian world, just a few
out of many, many more. Still, I have informed you on the ones I thought to
be the most important and useful. So next time you visit one of these 7 places
(well really 6, since you’ll never visit Jelly World), remember this guide to
dialects and manner, and I’m most certain that you really will have a friend
in no time at all! Good luck, or as they say in Tyrannia, Gedd lakka!
Mail Appreciated. And is Boingy a word?