Peas and Carrots: the Zebinator

     Phloosh the furiously evil Pea Chia cackled maliciously and picked up his equally evil Zebie named Zebie. The Petpet squealed in delight at the sight of his master's creation: the Zebinator. This giant mechanical Zebie-shaped robot was just the beginning of Phloosh and Zebie's horrific plan of complete power over Neopia and its inhabitants.

     "When I release this baby," Phloosh told Zebie, "we shall rule over all of Neopia, you and I. I shall be KING!"

     Zebie poked Phloosh in an annoying fashion.

     "Oh yes, and of course you rule equally as QUEEN! Wait, you're not a girl, are you? Well then, from now on, Neopia has TWO KINGS! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"

     Completely and utterly bored, the Zebie rolled his eyes at Phloosh's insanity.

     "Now, dear Zebie," Phloosh cried, picking the Petpet up and cradling him in his arms. "We must put our master plan into action. Are you ready?"

     Zebie grinned.

     **********

      "You're it!" cried a beautiful Faerie Pteri, tagging her best friend, Oscar.

      "Hey, no fair!" Oscar complained, trying to jump up and touch Rain, who was now hovering in midair. "You can't fly in tag!"

      "He's right, Rain," spoke up Char, a fire Wocky. "You're not allowed to use your wings for an advantage in this game. Nice try, though." He winked at Rain and began speeding off in the other direction.

      "Aww! Not cool. You guys know I can't run well!" Nevertheless, the Pteri landed next to Oscar, who immediately tagged her on the wing.

      "You're it!" screamed the skunk Lupe, laughing.

      Rain made a face at Oscar.

      "I'm done," she said angrily.

      Oscar patted her on the back.

      "Okay," he said, grinning. "We can see how far Char gets before noticing we're not chasing him."

      Rain giggled. She and Oscar had been best friends for a long time; they were inseparable. When Char moved into the neighborhood he was immediately welcomed into the friendship, but there was no doubt that Rain and Oscar were closer with each other than with Char.

      "Hmm," said Oscar. "He doesn't seem to have noticed… Think I should go get him?"

      Rain nodded, still smiling. Oscar sped off.

      "Squeak!" Rain jumped and looked around, confused at the sudden random squeak. She noticed a tiny Petpet that looked like a Zebie to her left, in some thick brush.

      "Oh, aren't you cute!" she said, standing up. She walked over to the Zebie and stuck out her wing. It seemed alarmed. "What's wrong?" she asked.

      "Squeak, squeak squeak. Squeak, squeak squeak!" the Zebie replied.

      "Um… Why don't you show me, then."

      The Zebie, as if it understood, began trotting off in the other direction. Rain followed, intrigued. They walked a ways into the forest until the tiny Petpet stopped. He squeaked in the direction of a dark, evil-looking cave.

      "In there?" Rain asked hesitantly.

      "Squeak!"

      "Hm… Well, okay."

      Rain walked straight into the mouth of the cave-the belly of the beast, one might say. She heard dripping coming from her left and her right, moans coming from far off tunnels, and the scritch-scratch of tiny Miamice claws. And yet she toiled forth, mustering all of her willpower simply to help one tiny, evil Zebie. She was ready for anything; she would go through thick and thin just to make this Zebie-who was planning on betraying her to a certain villain in a very evil manner-happy.

      And then she changed her mind.

      This sudden change of character was due to several things. (1) She was cold, tired, and had just realized Oscar and Char didn't know where she was. (2) She had reached the end of the cave and didn't find any way to help the Zebie, and (3) she realized the Zebie had led her straight into a trap, for standing in front of her was a certain Pea Chia with a certain evil grin and a certain evil object in his hand which was designed for trapping unsuspecting Neopets.

      And so the Pteri screamed.

      "MWAHAHA! There's no escape now, little Pteri! I shall have complete power over you when I put my evil plan into action!"

      "W-What plan?" Rain managed to stutter.

      "MWAHAHAHAHA! Now why would I tell you? All that would do is give you more reasons to escape! Let's just say that it involves a robot, your brain, and evilness, and it will all come together to… DOMINATE THE WORLD!"

      Rain was incredibly nervous, but not because of Phloosh's plan. She was nervous because she was completely convinced that she was standing before a madman!

      "Now, Rain, it is time for you to-"

      "WAIT!" Rain cried.

      "HM?"

      "How do you know my name?"

      "Zebie told me."

      "Your Zebie told you?"

      "Yes. How else would I-"

      "But Zebies can't talk. In fact, no Petpet can talk. For one thing, it's against the rules. And for another, they just aren't physically able to."

      "Don't give me your nonsense about rules and being physically able to do stuff! I won't have it. Zebies CAN talk."

      "No they can't."

      "Yes they can!"

      "No they can't."

      "YES-THEY-CAN!"

      "Well your Zebie didn't tell you my name."

      "What? Yes he did!"

      "No he didn't."

      "Yes he did!"

      "Nope."

      "But I specifically remember…" Phloosh began talking to himself, apparently trying to remember when Zebie had supposedly spoken to him. Rain waited patiently for him to figure out that she was right. "Fine, maybe Zebies can't talk. But that's beside the point! I need you for your brain, not your nonsense about Zebies that can talk! MWAHAHAHA!" And with that, Phloosh threw his certain evil trapping device at Rain, who wasn't able to escape in time.

      "Mwahahahaha!" cackled the tiny Zebie.

     **********

      By now you may be wondering what has happened to our only other two sane characters. When Oscar caught up to Char, they both trotted back to the clearing where Rain had been sitting. They were astonished to see that Rain no longer lingered there, so they split up in search of their friend.

     "RAAAAAAAAAAAAIN!" called a worried Oscar. "RAAAAAAAAAAAIN!"

     "WHERE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE YOUUUUUU?!" called Char. He wandered off into the woods, looking everywhere for the lost Pteri. He finally came to a dark, evil-looking cave, and decided he had no choice but to enter. So enter he did-he slowly walked through the shady tunnel step-by-step. He heard dripping coming from his left and his right, moans coming from far off tunnels, and the scritch-scratch of tiny Miamice claws. And yet he toiled forth.

     And he didn't change his mind.

     When he got to the end of the cave, he hid behind a boulder and watched Phloosh and Zebie tie up Rain. But what could he do? Well, he had several choices. (1) He could run back and get help, but by then something horrible could happen to Rain. (2) He could immediately confront the evil pair, despite Phloosh's evil trapping device which meant almost certain trapped-ness, and hope that he could defeat them, or he could (3) stay where he was, watching and waiting, until he had enough information to make a rational decision.

     Surprisingly enough, the Wocky chose choice number three. So he waited. And he watched. And waited some more.

     "MWAHAHAHAHA!" chuckled the evil Phloosh. "Now I have a brain-although extremely unintelligent-that will work to power my Zebinator! HM… Where did I put that thing?" he began looking around the cave, ignoring the squirming and gagged Rain. "I know I put it here somewhere…" Char couldn't stand the fear that was in Rain's eyes. He had to do something! However, before he had a chance to do some heroic action, the incredibly evil Zebie pushed a red button that seemed to randomly appear, and the boulder that Char was hiding behind stood up.

     Wait a minute, Char thought. Boulders don't stand up. They don't even have legs! But this one did-four of them. It also had a giant head-a Zebie head-attached to a proportionately small body.

      "GAAAAAAAH!" cried Char. Luckily no one heard him over the incredibly loud mechanical sounds the Zebinator was making.

      Neeer-CH! Neer-CH! The sounds the Zebinator made with each step rang in Char's ears. Although he stood in full view of Phloosh and his Zebie, gaping up at the gigantic robot, no one noticed him.

      "Now Rain, although your dull mind is probably not smart enough to comprehend this, I'm going to tell you my master plan. You see, this magnificent robot here-the Zebinator-is my key to taking over Neopia. However, right now it simply does what I tell it to. This would be ideal, if I felt like constantly commanding it to things, and if it understood anything but Crokabek."

      The robot screeched loudly ("I'm hungry" in Crokabek).

      "However, like I said, it only speaks Crokabek, and that's where you come in. We need a brain to make the Zebinator function properly. With your mind it will both listen to my commands AND destroy Neopia on its own! Isn't this wonderful? MWAHAHAHAHAHA! *ahem*

      "Anyways. The next thing Zebie and I are going to do is open this hatch on the Zebinator-" He opened the hatch. "And put you inside." He picked the struggling Rain up and shoved her into the tiny compartment. It did not look comfortable. He slammed the hatch shut and locked it by turning a wheel several times. "MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"

      The Zebinator screeched in Crokabek and turned around in a 90 degree circle, chewing with its huge jaw. It opened its mechanical mouth and stuck out its silver metal tongue… And on that tongue was a glass box with Rain inside.

      Rain had been freed from her binds; now there were wires stuck to her skull by little suckers. She was pounding the glass frantically, trying to escape. She was yelling something, but the sound of her voice was muffled by the glass.

      Char looked around anxiously, trying to find something-anything that could help him save Rain. THERE! Sitting among the dirty brown rocks was another dirty brown rock. It could do just what Char needed! He ran over to the pile of rocks and picked it up.

      Rain was beginning to feel sleepy as her brain started to slowly turn to mush.

      "MWAHAHAHAHAHA! In a few more seconds your brain will be so mushy you will not be able to think any longer! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"

      "Mwahahahahaha!" Zebie squealed.

      CRASH!

      Phloosh covered Zebie's eyes as well as his own, whimpering with fear as large shards of glass came pouring down from the Zebinator. The robot screeched in pain as Char climbed up its leg and onto the giant tongue. He pulled the limp Rain out from the box, ripping the wires off of her forehead.

      "NOOOOO!" cried Phloosh, sobbing. "MY ZEBINATOR!"

      The Zebinator was indeed damaged; its head was turned sideways, its tongue had been chopped in two (by what, no one knows), and its legs were beginning to shake. With one last groan the entire thing came crashing down in a heap of metal and glass.

      Char ran all the way out of the cave with Rain in his arms. When they got back into the woods he cried, "OSCAR! OVER HERE!" and continued to run, hoping that Oscar had heard.

      He had. Oscar came sprinting over within minutes, and gasped when he saw Rain lying unconscious on the ground.

      "What happened?!" he asked, shocked. "Where was she?"

      "I'll explain later. Her brain was starting to turn to mush."

      "Mush?!"

      "Mush."

      "Oh my gosh, mush!"

      "Mush."

      *cough*

      "Anyway, we need to get her to the hospital as soon as possible! How far away is the nearest hospital?"

      "Not far. Put her on my back; I'll run to the hospital. You can catch up once we're there. 'Kay?"

      "Okay."

      Char put Rain on Oscar's back and just like that the Lupe took off running. He certainly was fast. You could tell he was not going to let this Pteri die. Char took a deep breath and ran after the Lupe, although he could not run nearly as fast.

     **********

      "Oscar? Char?"

      "RAIN!" Oscar and Char both cried in unison.

      "Hey, what's up?" she said, rubbing her eyes and sitting up in her hospital bed. "Wow, my brain hurts."

      Oscar and Char looked at each other and laughed.

     **********

      In a certain evil headquarters of a certain evil villain, a Zebie cackled, and a Pea Chia roared in anger.

      "I'LL GET YOU NEXT TIME!"

The End

Author's Note: Hey guys, hope you liked this little story! I know it's not great, but hopefully it was entertaining for you to read. I'll try and write more Peas and Carrots stories, and maybe make some comics, too. HM… Anyway, feel free to Neomail me, and be SURE to check out my guild! I'd love for you to join, too!