100 Stinkin, Cheesy, Rejected Neopian Times Titles
Also by sirussblack
DEEP CATACOMBS - Titles can make a big difference when writing an article or a series or a comic
or a short story! It can also eliminate harmful run-on sentences as shown in the
prior sentence (and blow up boogers)! Soooooooo, Sirius and I just luuuve being
big helps to this fat, little world of ours! We’re here to tell you all the titles
that you never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever…
[5 years pass]
…ever, ever, ever put into an article or a series or a comic or a short story!
So let’s get this musical started!
Sirius: Uh, Blub, this isn’t a musical…
Blub: …heh, good one!
1. And One, Two, Four, Six, Fifty, One, Ten, Nine, Be
2. This Is A Story of a Neopet Who Lost His Hair and Got It Back in the End
3. Cheese is Just Another Word for Turdle
5. Too Day
6. Hannah – The Little Usul who Tried to Eat a Tomato but Failed Miserably
7. Fact or Fiction – Smelly Asparagus is Smelly
8. Dis Arcle Iz Kool
9. Chicken and Liver
10. People and Things
12. CHICKENS PWN ALL OF US!!!
13. OMG – the SCARY WORLD OF chatspeak
14. I Ate My Petpet
15. How to Eat Your Petpet
16. Sixty Ways to Pick Your Nose
17. Keep Laughing – The Myncis Will Attack
18. The 10 Step Guide to Admitting You’re a N00b
19. I Am a Scammer and Hacker – This is Not a Scam
20. Kass is a Big Loser Who Likes Neocola and Can’t Stop Drinking it Thus Gets
Fat and Eats Me
21. THE TOTALLY AWESOME ARTICLE THAT SHOUTS A LOT!!!
22. How 2 Go 2 the Mony Tree
24. How to Make the Longest Article Name in the History of Neopia and Get Away
with It (Also a Guide to get the Longest Article Name in the History of Neopia
Published into the excellent newspaper called the Neopian Times) (Also Your
One Way Guide to Famedom as you have the Longest Article Name in the History
of Neopia) (Also a Guide to Earn Neopoints as the Person with the Longest Article
Name in the History of Neopia and Make Lots of Money Because you are cool for
being the Person with the Longest Article Name in the History of Neopia (And
Like Cheese because you are the person with the Longest Article Title in the
History of Neopia and the only one to have Gotten Away with it Because you are
the person with the Longest Article Title in the Neopian Times in the History
25. Dubloons are the Next Asparagus
26. Borovan is Asparagus and Asparagus is Money and Money is Cheese
27. Kow Ki!
28. Talking on the Phone That I Bought From the Space Station
29. The Story That Breaks all the Rules
30. The !!! Tale
31. People Made Fun of my Pimple and I Cried
32. I Hate Snowflake! She Keeps Rejecting My Junk!
33. I Lyke Blu
34. A Pound and Adoption and Abandoning Story
35. How to Write a Pound and Adoption and Abandoning Story
36. Na-na-boo-boo, stick your head in doo-doo!
37. The Truth about Marriag—AHHH! =is thrown down on the ground by two mysterious
36. Manual to Getting Yourself A Bruise
37. 10 Simple Steps to Getting a Life
38. I HAVE A LIFE! BELIEVE ME!
39. I’m Stoneman3x. I Swear I Am!
40. I Can Count To Three! HA!
41. Crouching Kougra, Hidden Draik
42. Dude, Where’s My Carthatdoesn’tactuallyexistinneopia?
43. Meepits Will Take Over: Written By Anonymous (Ridergirl333)
44. NO, WEEWOOS WILL: Written By Anonymous (Laurensama)
45. How to Make Homeade Weewoo Dumplings
46. Martha Lennert: It’s A Terrible Thing
47. Nonsencical Verbiage (In Other Words: Just a Bunch of Weird Adjectives)
48. Really Confused: I’m Really Confused
49: OMG, BEING FAT IS THE BEST!
50. FAT FAT FAT, I LOVE FAT!
51: Sirius and Rider, Sitting In a Tree…
53: Trust Me, I’ll Think of a Title Later
54: Adam: He’s Really Number 5!
55: Asparagus Chias Suck!
56. [is frozen]
57. Getting Away With Everything on the Neoboards
59. Hmmmm, Asparagus Makes You Smell Bad
60. DING DONG I'M...Alive?
61. We're Not in Neopia Anymore!
62. Thiz zdorri Rilz!
63. Blood and Gore and Death and Marriage
64. The Never-ending SERIES: Part 676421100364
65. I am Cheese - Behold my Neopoints
66. Catnip - The Poor Person’s Petpet
67. The Seventh Sense (No copyright infringement here...nope...*shifty eyes*)
68. Blubby and Char, Sitting In a Tree...
69. I Know What You Did Last Month of Running (Once again, there's no copyright
70. Blaming It
71. Henry Spooner and the Wizard's Ball (HAH! No plagerism...)
72. The Story of
73. [insert good title here]
75. The Sarcastic Book of Wisecracks and Sarcastic Stuff...
76. Blubby is Fat!
77. Neocola Is Made with Dung
78. Kaus are Funny - The True Story
79. My Life as a Pro-Kau Killer
80. Merridel Pitchfork Massacre (Hmm...)
81. Free Tilly (*blinks*)
82. Eyelashes are People Too!
83. –BLOCKED- IS REAL! DON’T BELIEVE
84: HEHE, RICE RYHMES WITH LICE!
85: Learnin;g How To; Use Semicolons;
86. Sirius; Is; Jealous; Of; Blubbeh’s; Dashing; Good; Looks
87. Sirius and His Humanized Eyelashes, Sitting In a Tree…
88. A Series of Incredibly Fortunate and Happy, Wonderful, Fantastic, Splendid
89: Lord of the...Rings?
90: Tips and Tricks for Putting Make-Up on Your Dung
91: The Losers
92: This Little Light of Miiine…
93…I’m Gonna’ Let It Shine…: A Sequel to This Little Light of Miiine…
94: ….Let It Shine, Let It Shine…: The Annoying 3rd Part of the This Little
Light of Mine Series
95: …LET IT SHIIIIINE!: Can I Strangle This Book?
96: I luuuuuve dung!
99: …are not allowed
100: 100 Stinkin, Cheesy, Rejected NT Titles (HAHA! IT’S NOT OUR TITLE! OUR
TITLE HAS NEOPIAN TIMES, NOT NT!)
If you’re still reading this, you're a very brave person. I'd give you a million
Neopoints if I wasn't as poor as a mop. Blubby would have been doing this but
he went off to eat donuts. A lot of donuts. So, if you really are not asleep
right now congrats! You've survived the worst article in the world. Anyways,
that's it from...erm...the Neopian Donut shop. Feed your artichokes lots of
meat! And be sure to get your Gelerts neutered! And...and...and...erm...Weewoos
are evil! See you on the moon!