Voice of the Neopian Pound Circulation: 106,486,787 Issue: 212 | 14th day of Collecting, Y7
Home | Archives Articles | Editorial | Short Stories | Comics | New Series | Continued Series
 

How to Have Fun With the Lab Map


by for_making_layouts

--------

This story is in dedication to all those poor lab pets everywhere!

My name is Layoutacara, Lay for short. I recently had a very…shall we say interesting experience with the lab ray…but it turned out to be quite fun! So this is a story telling just how a poor lab pet can really have fun with the lab ray. : )

     "Ohhh, Lay! Come see what I've got for you! " My owner's singsong voice came from the door.

     I poked my head out from under the bed (which is no mean feat, seeing as I'm a baby Acara, and my horns are always getting stuck everywhere). But anyway, I was hiding under the bed because of an unfortunate incident involving a now melted ice desk and a fire jug that I had opened (accidentally, of course). Batting my eyelashes heavily, I ran across the room and exclaimed, "Oh, joy! My favorite owner in the entire world has arrived home!"

      My owner looked at me suspiciously as I stood right in front of a large puddle. Apparently she didn't notice that her desk was missing, because she smiled and brought her bag over to the table.

      "I got your favorite today… a rasmelon smoothie and Chili hotdog! Oh, and guess what else I got… a petpet!"

     A Hopso hopped awkwardly onto the table. I picked it up and started petting it and cuddling it and everything until it hit me. I frowned. "Okay, what's up? For my BIRTHDAY, all you got me was a balloon. Now, it's just a regular day, and you give me my favorite meals AND a petpet! What gives?"

     My owner sighed. Then she took out her bag again. "Well…. I was kind of hoping… maybe you'd like to? I don't know…"

     She reached into the bag and pulled out a piece of paper. Then another. And another. She pulled out six more. Wait…. they had stuff written on them… it looked like a drawing… or… a map….

     **********

     I woke up. For the first time, I realized I was quite comfortable in my bed. Then I realized that this was a real bed, not my itchy straw one. While I looked around this unfamiliar place, a Lupe doctor came over to me.

     "Oh, good to see you're awake! Well, your owner is in the waiting room, I think she'd like to see you now, of course." He crossed the room and a kind Cybunny who appeared to be a nurse came up to me.

     "Oh, hello dear. We've been so worried about you, you know. You've been asleep for quite a few days now. Oh, but I bet you're wondering why you're here!"

     I tried to nod vigorously, but found that it hurt, so all I managed was a weird diagonal half-nod. The nurse seemed to understand though.

     "Yes, well you took quite a nasty fall, you know! Your owner" --here she threw a dirty look at the door which my owner was probably behind-- "told us that she was about to show you the lab map that she had bought to use on you. Apparently you took one look at the map, and went into a kind of shock. You fell on the floor and hit your head, and you've been asleep for a few days. Honestly, the nerve of some owners, trying to force their pets to go to the lab ray!"

     She glanced across the room to see the doctor Lupe returning with my owner.

     "Well, you take care now. I expect the doctor won't want me crowding you with information. Buh-bye!" She walked over to another patient's bed, just as my owner came up to mine.

      "Oh, Lay! I'm so sorry!" She reached over to hug me but I withdrew quickly; her sleeves were soaking.

     "I'm sorry, but I don't want to get all wet. Why are you wet, anyway?" I asked.

     "Oh, I only came back to the hospital a few minutes ago, before I was in our neohome. It was really weird, there was this huge puddle of water. And our beautiful Ice desk is gone. It's so weird!" She said again, staring thoughtfully into space.

     I giggled, but managed to conceal it as a cough, though the nurse who was straightening my sheets chuckled. Grinning, I said, "Yeah. Really weird. But anyway, when are they saying I can get out of here?"

     The same nurse looked up and smiled. "If you feel okay, you could leave now, if you'd like. Just make sure you drop by the healing springs later, okay?" She leaned into me while my owner wandered off. "And if I were you, I'd look into replacing that desk."

     **********

     A few hours later, after I had been checked out of the hospital, my owner and I were at our neohome again, about to eat dinner.

      "You know, Lay," she said, pulling out from her backpack a disgusting looking omelette covered in barbecue sauce. "You could give the lab ray a chance. I mean, it could turn you into a royal Acara, or a faerie Acara, or make you level 15 million bajillion! Or you could turn into a beautiful Ccybunny, or Kyrii, or Uni, or…"

     I scooped the omelette off of the floor where my owner had dropped it while she was daydreaming.

      I rolled my eyes and interrupted her. "-- Or I could be turned into a level negative one hundred, or turn me into Techo, or paint me skunk, or sponge or…" -I shuddered at the very thought - "Asparagus!" My owner frowned, and I continued. "The only way I would ever, ever, EVER set FOOT in that lab would be if you got me-"

     But before I could finish, my owner grabbed me by the shoulders and plopped me down on a chair. She sat down on the opposite side. "Listen," she said flatly. "I am your owner. I don't HAVE to buy you anything to make you use the lab. You WILL, and that's the end of it!" I narrowed my eyes.

     **********

     "Great!" I exclaimed. We were walking by the shops in Neopia Central. I looked down at a list that was longer than I was. "Okay…. we're nearly done, now… We've got the angelpuss, the baabaa, the warf, the kadoatie, and the frowny…we also have all thirty different kinds of balloons…complete sets of both bottled faeries and codestones…now we need to do is go to the Neolodge and book my reservation for the day after the lab day." I grinned up at my owner.

     "I really do NOT know how I get myself into these things," she muttered. I ignored her as usual.

     "Now, remember, it's the AstroVilla, and if you even TRY to book the Cockroach Towers, I swear, I will never even consider the lab ray AGAIN!" I laughed. "And, make sure that I have all the extras, you know, the restaurant, the burger bar, the fitness center, the NT delivery--to my DOOR, mind you-- the maid service, the en-suite bathroom," I paused to take a deep breath. "The Jacuzzi/spa, grooming, the swimming pool, tennis courts, sauna, AND laundry facilities. ALL for…. I don't know, say…. two weeks?"

     My owner looked at me incredulously. "TWO WEEKS?"

     I smiled at her, mildly surprised. "Yeah, isn't that okay?"

      She started to freak out. "Um, no, that is NOT okay. First off, do you know how much that would cost? The AstroVilla, with all the extras, for fourteen days? I don't think so! And secondly, the lab ray is only for ONE DAY. I mean, come on!"

     Not even glancing up from my list, I nodded, "Yeah, whatever. Okay, after we book the hotel, we still need to visit Kayla's potion shop, you know, to get a baby Acara morphing potion, just in case I get turned into a tomato Chia or something. But, first I think you need to stop off at the bank, so let's hop to it!" And so we walked to the National Neopian, with my owner grumbling something about being practically on a junior saver account.

     **********

     The next day, after my owner had ordered a room in our neohome to be made completely of gold my owner began to talk to me again. "Okay, I have bought you EVERYTHING you have EVER wanted. Now you HAVE to go to the lab ray with me!"

     I rolled my eyes. "Oh, all right. Well, let's go now, and get it over with," I replied grumpily.

     My owner looked surprised I had given in so easily. She pulled out her backpack. "Oh-well, okay. First we have to put the map pieces together-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" She screamed as a pile of ashes fell out of her backpack. I grinned. It looked like I had 'accidentally' opened another fire bottle. : )

The End

 
Search the Neopian Times




Great stories!


---------

NeoComp
Stuff 'em all in...

by chibikatza

---------

Lupe Crackers
Sometimes you just need to think outside the square...

by jbear113

---------

Prince Jazan's Effect on Tourism
Stop Prince Jazan now for the sake of Neopia's economy!!!

by k_aren_z

---------

Getting Back to Basics
I wondered how these pets survived with just enough to eat when my pets could barely go on for a day without their Red Long Hair Brushes. I thought it over and came to a conclusion: Why couldn’t we survive like wild pets do? It couldn’t be that hard...

by horserider12302



Submit your stories, articles, and comics using the new submission form.