Parting is Grief: a Neopian Packrat's Guide
YOUR SAFETY DEPOSIT BOX – Picture this: You’re standing in front of a towering,
gray vault. As the lock twists open, you take a step back. The door swings and
a mountain of old junk and new junk starts to fall, toppling from the peak of
the vault until you’re able to swim in it. Surrounding you are old books, toys,
food that has probably rotted, petpets, codestones, trading cards and magic items.
Hmm… what’s wrong with this scenario?
Ooh, I know! Pick me! You’ve got too much junk. You’re a regular Neopian packrat.
Well, let’s find out for sure. If I were to say, “Okay, I’m going to put all
the stuff cluttering up your Safety Deposit Box in your shop to be sold.” What
would be your response?
A) Sure! Get rid of it all! More neopoints for me.
B) Err… maybe get rid of some of it. But not all of it, okay?
C) …What? Aaagh! No! Not all my stuff… -desperation continues to climb- NOOOOOOOOOO!
If you chose A, then no, you’re not a packrat. If you chose B, then you’re
most likely the average Neopian collector of junk. However if you chose C, then
yes, you are definitely a packrat. This article is for you! But if you chose
A or B, feel free to read on, hopefully it will be entertaining. ^^
The Basics of Being a Packrat
Okay, let’s get a proper definition of a packrat: “packrat: noun, a collector
of useless random objects”. If your Safety Deposit Box has more than five hundred
items in it that hold no purpose whatsoever, it’s time to get rid of them. Did
you try for the Packrat avatar and fail? Are you even an avatar collector? Or
are you just lazy and not in the mood to sell anything? My question is: why
do you feel the need to keep all of your Neopet items that are continuing to
pile in your SDB?
Why not sell most of your stuff? Now, I understand that there are some things
that are good to keep hold of, maybe like gifts, expensive things and items
that hold sentimental value, but everything else is just junk. If you need me
to, I will gladly pry every useless item from your hands until you are happy
enough with the profit you’ve made from them.
Getting Rid of it
Great! So you’ve decided to clear out some of the junky stuff in your SDB to
use it exclusively for the good stuff. A wise decision! There are lots of different
ways to part with items, such as:
-Sell them. This is the obvious answer. Once I bought a book, Popular Neopian
Stories for seven thousand neopoints from the Shop Wizard. I never read
it to my pets. Instead, I crammed it in my trusty SDB and re-discovered it a
year later. You know how much it’s worth now? 75k. I made a nice profit off
that, let me tell you. Anything from 50+ neopoints you should put in your shop.
It adds up, and depending on your stuff, you could have nearly one hundred thousand
neopoints decaying in your SDB. Think about it!
-Give them away. Well, I don’t suggest you bombard people with your old junk,
but if it’s something you think someone might enjoy, give it to a Neofriend.
Another option is to donate it to the Money Tree. The Money Tree provides items
to the less fortunate in Neopia and entertainment to those with fast computers.
Either way, it’s someone else’s responsibility now!
-Use them. If it’s a book, read it to your pet. If (s)he’s already read it,
then you can sell it or just read it to another pet. If it’s a food item, feed
it to your pet. This will not only make your pets happy and healthy, but also
get rid of your items quicker.
Like I said before: some items are worth having and you should keep them! That’s
what a Safety Deposit Box is for. To safely deposit stuff in a box. See?
Determining What to Give Up
This process may take some time, depending on how many items you have stashed
away. Heck, I have some stuff from the Advent Calendar in year 4. Anyway, let’s
do another little quiz. I’ll give you a list of items, and you determine whether
or not it is necessary to get rid of them (using an item is considered getting
rid of it and so is selling). Okay? Get a piece of paper and pencil ready and
write either ‘give up’ or ‘keep’ for each of the items listed below. Here we
Give up or keep:
-A 2/3 Carrot and Pea Omelette.
-A gift from a good Neofriend
-Broken Green Mynci Puppet
-Lime Chia Pop
-A prize from a game/contest
All done? Good! Here’s your answer key.
-2/3 Carrot and Pea Omelette – Give it up. Feed it to your pet or sell it.
Either way, you don’t need it!
-Kacheek Book - Give it up. You can read it to your pet or sell it.
-A gift from a Neofriend – I’d keep it, but that’s just me. You could sell
it or use it for your pet if that was what it was intended for, but remember
that someone took the time to send it to you. That decision is yours.
-Vo Codestone – Give it up. You know, there’s a nifty Training School on Mystery
Island that you can take your Codestones to. Not into fighting? Sell it. They
are worth around 4k each.
-Broken Green Mynci Plushie – (and you have this in your SDB because…?) Give
it up. Donate it maybe, or just discard it unless you want to take it to Donny
up on Terror Mountain. But do you really think it’s necessary to walk all that
way just to pay neopoints to get it fixed? Nah.
-Lime Chia Pop – Give it up. It will be a wonderful treat for your Neopet or
just something unique to put in your shop.
-A prize from a game/contest – You might want to keep it. I’ve won a few things
that I couldn’t dream of giving up and they are nice to keep in your SDB. You
could sell an item like this, though; the answer could go either way.
-Attack Fork – Give it up. This is a Battledome item. You could equip it to
your Neopet or sell it. If you have a friend who likes fighting, perhaps you
could give it to them! This answer could also go either way.
The Benefits of Giving Up
There are many positive things that will happen as you start to slowly get
rid of some of your junk. For instance, your Safety Deposit Box will look a
little more organized and you can save it for the special stuff that you want
You’ll have a nice amount of neopoints growing every day in your bank account
from the profit you made when you sold all of your old stuff.
You won’t spend so much time searching through pages of items or finding everything
by using the Quick Search. Everything you need will be right there and easy
I hope this article helped you kiss your old junk good-bye and watch your Shop
Till grow as more Neopian Packrats buy all of your stuff. It’s like a chain,
you know? You sell a bunch of junk, someone else comes along and buys it and
hopefully after reading this article, they decide to sell it again. I know I
don’t want my old junk anymore, so into my shop it goes! Perhaps you can take
a few minutes every day to organize your Safety Deposit Box and make some decisions.
This is Playmobil saying: it’s time for some changes! Get off your lazy behind
and get rid of your useless junk! Oh, and feel free to neomail me, I like feedback.
I keep it all…oops. I’m not a packrat, I swear! O_o
Disclaimer: I am not responsible for any regrets you have if you decide to
give up your items. This article was only meant for fun and not necessarily to
be taken seriously. ^^
Thanks, beewitched2, for editing.