Ghosts of the Money Tree?
NEOPIA CENTRAL - It all started one typical day: I checked my purse to see if
I had enough money to buy some Hot Soup from the food store for my trip to Terror
Mountain (I was going there on a business trip to interview the Snow Faerie on
what she needs all of that stuff for, and if she has any knowledge on the Snowager.)
Of course, instead of finding a bundle of Neopoints inside my sequinned purse,
a little bug flies comically out.
Too lazy to return to the bank and go through the whole procedure for the withdrawal
of a couple NP, I decided to drop by the Money Tree instead. As usual, there
was an enormous line and I was suddenly very thankful of the fact that I had
decided to send my pets to the Neolodge for a couple of days. I needed to work,
after all, and I felt bad just leaving them at our Neohome.
The line moved slowly yet surely and I entertained myself by watching the owners
and pets at the Rainbow Pool. Allow me to recommend that. It's very fun to watch
a plain Yellow Poogle be painted Snot. Then again, it's also kind of repulsive.
But I digress.
Eventually the line pushed me to the mob surrounding the tree. It didn't get
much better from there. Only when everything was gone did the mob move even
a little, but then more donations appeared and people scrabbled to grab the
20 NP or broken plushie. It was total and utter chaos! You were lucky to get
a pile of dung!
It was here, in the midst of all of this, that I saw something totally and
utterly unsensible. It was a Quiggle Ghost! Clear as daylight! And it wasn't
just a Quiggle PAINTED Ghost either! Oh, this was the real thing! It floated,
it groaned, it had a weird smell, and it's eyes were as blank as a chalkboard
in the summer!
But it wasn't the fact that there was an actual Quiggle Ghost floating around
the Money Tree, it was the oddity of the creature taking a couple hundred NP
and a Brightvale Berry!
I could nothing but stare, mouth agape, at where the creature had been just
moments before, and that isn't the best thing to do in a crazed mob out for
free stuff, as I soon learned. Some seconds later, I was out on the street,
missing a sleeve to my Yes Boy Ice Cream shirt, and still wondering if what
I had seen had actually occurred.
Obviously, I deduced it must have been so, otherwise I wouldn't be writing
this article on the very incident now would I?
Apparently, Ghosts are seen at the Money Tree all of the time, but they aren't
always taking. Sometimes, they are donating! But why? What is their motivation?
I believe we should first tackle where the Ghosts come from. Obviously they
are the restless spirits of Neopets who have fallen victim to such creatures
as the Spider Grundo or the notorious Shadow Usul. That or they just had an
unfortunate experience in the Haunted Woods at one point or another. So why
do they haunt the Money Tree? Or rather, why do they bother in gathering there?
You see, it doesn't seem to make sense because they are ghosts. As such, what
use do they have of money? Or food? Or toys? Why do they take it? And where
do they take it to?
After a little bit of research on Neopia's Ghosts, I have put together this
scenario explaining the whole phenomena:
LUPE GHOST: Hey Guys! I've snagged a couple Half-Eaten Berries!
POOGLE GHOST: Awesome! That makes it fifty Half-Eaten Berries for us and only
thirty-five for Quiggle and Chia Ghost!
QUIGGLE GHOST: That's a lie! We have forty-three! Chia Ghost just snagged some!
POOGLE GHOST: No no, he just DONATED some.
QUIGGLE GHOST: The fool! Now we're behind!
LUPE GHOST: Ah, don't feel bad, Quiggle Ghost! You are ahead of us in the NP!
QUIGGLE GHOST: No we aren't! Chia Ghost donated the whole lot this morning.
LUPE GHOST: Oh. Tough cookies then, eh?
You see, they take because they are in a contest against one another on who
can reach a certain number of items before donating the whole lot of it! Actually,
I just thought of that because of its absurdity, somewhat like the entire notion
of ghosts taking and giving to the Money Tree altogether!
Perhaps the Ghosts are actually the minions to some bigger fiend. Like Hubrid
Nox! Ah, yes, the ever notorious Hubrid Nox. After studying this hypothesis,
I have compiled yet another scenario to make it easy for readers like you to
understand the complexity of Hubrid's insidious plot:
HUBRID NOX: Bwahaha! I am pure genius! I have concocted yet another brilliant
scheme to take over Neopia!
MINION #1: Yay!
MINION #2: Do tell, oh great and wonderful Hubrid of malicious Noxiousness!
HUBRID NOX: Heh, don't mind if I do! You see, I summon all of the Ghosts of
Neopia (or else create a couple, bwaha!) and make them STEAL from the Money
Tree! You see? No donations means poorer Neopia, and poorer Neopia means more
sadness and weakness! That is when I will make my move!
MINION #1: What about the stores?
MINION #2: Yeah, there are plenty of other ways to get NP and items, Master
of All Things Vile.
HUBRID NOX:.....SILENCE! *destroys Minions #1 and 2*
MINION #3: Uh...if you ask me, sire, I think your plan is brilliant!
HUBRID NOX: Why thank you, Minion #3. You deserve a cookie.
MINION #3: Yay!
You see? The only probable problem in the hypothesis is the fact that the Ghosts
don't only TAKE, they give back too. So, after looking at all of the other possible
reasons, I have created a theory that I feel might just be right. I can feel
it in my bones!
My theory is that the Ghosts, in all of their malice, TAKE items that they
have no use for and bring it back to their evil Ghost Lair. There, they put
all of the "booty" in a big pile. Then I guess they Ghosts go haunt stuff and
play cards or something. Then, when they get enough of their booty, they donate
some back to the Money Tree, thus keeping a steady economy. Why do they donate
it back? Well, you don't want stuff you don't need cluttering up your evil lair,
do you? No, you should only want just enough to be evil, but not enough for
it to be a nuisance.
Ghosts are essential! They are the missing link! Whenever the Money Tree is
low on donations, the Ghosts take it upon themselves to donate until it isn't
necessary anymore! Ah, yes, this is the key.
So the Ghosts are like nice packrats. But why do they do it? What do they gain?
Perhaps they are just NICE restless, revenge-seeking spirits. Or maybe there
is another, more sinister reason behind their relationship to Neopia Central's
biggest attraction. Perhaps my Hubrid Nox theory is correct in more ways than
Well, I've laid down the playing field and shown my cards so if anyone has
any better plays, don't afraid to share it! But until I see something better,
I'm sticking with what I've got.
This has been Eripsa, the Eternal Detective, with yet another article questioning
the conspiracies and abnormalities of Neopia.