Past the Layers of Lies - the True Jelly Chia
Ever since I was little, I was obsessed with finding out the truth. The truth
about good and evil, to find out what was beyond those layers of lies. Now I have
dedicated my life to find answers about those who lurk among Neopia. You think
you may know, but you have no idea.
A few days ago I found myself lurking in a very old building. Even in the daytime,
no light went through the windows of this factory. I was there to search for
the mysterious Jelly Chia. You think I’m crazy, don’t you? Well, I’m not, if
you’re wondering. Of course I’ve seen the warnings. “Don't go inside however...
whatever you do....” Those warnings, however, just bounced off of me. I was
determined (and just a little bit desperate) to find the truth and reveal it
to all the good people of Neopia.
After checking the kitchen several times for food, I walked carefully into
a very dusty hallway; I realized that my shoe had been caught in a small pile
of red goo. After releasing my shoe, I kneeled down to examine the strange concoction.
I dipped my finger into it and brought it up to my nose. Jelly. I knew I was
getting close. What I didn’t realize was that I was much closer than I thought.
I walked into what looked like a large ballroom, which was quite strange to
have in an old abandoned factory. I sniffed the stale air, only to find a delightful
smell of jelly. I began to follow the smell, determined to find the source.
I followed all the way to a large library. I walked among the aisles of shelves,
amazed at all the books. I found a particularly heavy one, and dusted it off.
Inventing Edible Friends, it was titled. Who was the author? Why, it was the
Wizzle, the creator of the Jelly Chia himself. I opened it and flipped through
the pages, only to find pictures of horrific creatures. Caramel Mynci, Pretzel
Kacheek, Cotton Candy Shoyru, and much more. Finally, on the last page, it was
titled in scraggly letters, Jelly Chia. A small corner had been folded, marking
I closed the book and with much difficulty, shoved it back into the shelf.
Suddenly, I saw a very small piece of paper flutter from the pages and onto
the ground. It was a photograph. Not just any photograph. A photograph of a
deranged Jubjub, with its arm around a mutated Chia. Both carried happy expressions
on their faces. (Although it was hard to tell with the Chia.) Suddenly, by instinct,
I dropped the photo and knew that I was not alone.
A heavy breathing filled the room and I slowly turned around to see a horribly
mutated Chia. It looked more like a big blob of red jelly, turned into a figure
of a Chia, which lacked an entire face.
“WHAT YOU WANT?” it bellowed.
I jumped back in surprise. “I-I’m here to interview you,” I stammered. Although,
it had no face, I could tell what its expression was.
“Interview? What is interview?” it asked with a hint of curiosity. I took a
small sigh of relief and I sat the Chia down in the kitchen. I did make it out
alive, you know. I have just one thing to say to all those who didn’t believe
in me, and were already planning my funeral: HA!
Interview with the Jelly Chia
Chibi (that’s me!): So Mr., uh, Jelly. We’ve all seen the Gallery of Evil and
your creator Wizzle; many Neopians are curious of what happened to him. Can
you tell us?
Jelly: Wizzle very bad man. Me no like him at all. Me, how you say, finished
Chibi: *scoots a little farther away* Okay then. Now, we are all curious of
what you do here in this old abandoned factory.
Jelly: Me do lots of things. First, me bounce around in kitchen. Second, me
bounce around in bedroom. Third, me bounce around in-
Chibi: Okay, I think we all get it.
Jelly: WHAT? ME NOT DONE YET!
Chibi: SORRY! C-continue p-please.
Jelly: Third, me bounce around in lobby. Fourth me bounce-
(We’re just going to skip the rest of that)
Chibi: Since you’re made of jelly, you probably don’t eat regular food. What
have you developed a taste for?
Jelly: Me like plushies.
Chibi: Plushies! That’s a relief.
Jelly: Me like Number Six Plushies. Those very yummy.
Chibi: Now, you caught me in the library looking at an old book, filled with
horrible recipes for other edible pets. Have you ever looked at that?
Jelly: Of course me have! Me even try to make one. But, me kept getting jelly
Chibi: All right. Just a few more questions. Do you stay in touch with anyone?
Any close friends?
Jelly: Me have no friends. Me thought Wizzle was friend, but he try to eat
Jelly Chia. Me also thought Kasey was friend, but she also try to eat Jelly.
Nobody like Jelly Chia. Everyone try to eat me.
Chibi: Who’s Kasey?
Jelly: Reporter like you. Come do interview. Pretend to be Jelly’s friend.
Instead, try to eat Jelly.
Chibi: W-what happened to h-her?
Jelly: Same thing that happened to Wizzle. Heh.
Chibi: *scoots a little farther away* Uh, Mr. Jelly. We are all very curious.
The question is why. Why do you like to scare others? Why?
Jelly: Why you want to know this? Why you come here?
Chibi: I told you. This is for the Neopian Times.
Jelly: NEOPIAN TIMES! I HATE NEOPIAN TIMES! THAT’S WHERE WIZZLE GET HIS IDEA!
THAT’S WHY KASEY COME. YOU NOT TRY TO BE FRIEND. YOU TRY TO EAT ME!
Chibi: N-no honestly. I w-would never try to eat you.
Jelly: Suddenly me very hungry. Me would love to eat something. You look yummy.
Chibi: It was great talking with you, really. I, uh have to go. I’ll show
myself out. THANKS!
Now, you the reader now know the cold hard truth about the misunderstood blob.
I hope that this report has helped you see through all the lies you’ve been
told. You will not hear from me for a while after this is published. It’s for,
er, let’s just say safety reasons. This is Chibichix, logging out.