Triss and the Psychiatrist
There Triss stood, directly in front of her tall purple-framed
mirror with her elegant snout sticking straight up into the air. Her auburn mane
fell beautifully to the right side of her neck, and she pursed her lips, showing
a gloss of red lipstick. Along with showing herself her lips, she fluttered her
eyelids, revealing green eyes and purple eye shadow. She winked at her own image
in the mirror, pretty much admitting to herself that she was the most beautiful
thing she had ever seen.
"Triss, what the heck are you doing?" I asked,
carrying a bag of food I had just gotten from the shops. I stopped in the center
of her room's doorway and stared at her. "And do I really want to know…?"
She smiled, "Well, today in school, this one
girl came up to me and told me I was stuck up." She paused. "So, to show her
I didn't care what she thought, I stuck my nose up in the air, and realized
what a great comeback that was! I'm now perfecting it so I can use it more often."
"Did you do anything to this girl to make her
tell you that you were stuck up?" I asked while trying unsuccessfully to cock
my left eyebrow.
Triss bit her lip. "Uh… of course not! You know
how rude and unpolite pets are these days!" With that, she turned her attention
back to perfecting her newfound comeback in the mirror and I walked away, shaking
my head, without even trying to correct her for using "unpolite" instead of
"impolite" or asking her to help me with the groceries.
"You might be wondering why I called you down
here, Triss," I said to my blue Peophin as I sat across the table from her.
She rolled her eyes. "You see, I haven't actually seen you get along with anyone
outside of our family, so I took it upon myself to make sure that you learn
correct social skills."
Triss's jaw dropped. "You think I have bad social
skills?! I am one of the most popular girls in school! I get along with anyone
that is willing to suck up to me!"
"Triss," I said, trying to calm her down. "I
just want you to be able to get along with everyone." I paused, thinking. "I
want every person you run into to like you," I added cheekily.
The Peophin paused, thinking about what I just
said. Close call, I thought to myself.
"Well," explained Triss, "since you put it that
way, I guess I'll put up with whatever you are going to do to me." I opened
my mouth to say something, but I was cut off by my Peophin. "Just what are you
planning to do?"
Doctor Ralph Earnest Seymour stood glancing at
his daily schedule. "Let's see… young Miss Angela's session just ended, and
I seem to have a new client…" His list read: O_Trissta_O.
"Says she has problems fitting in." He glanced
back at his own days in school, how he never quite got along with anyone else,
how the old Blumaroo stuck his nose in the books all the time. He never regretted
it. Doctor Seymour was hitting it big time; being a psychiatrist had its downsides,
but the income was great, and the patients usually weren't that bad. At least,
they weren't yet.
Either way, he felt like he would really be able
to connect with this client. He'd had troubles fitting in as well. He'd tell
her a few success stories, how it didn't matter what other pets thought of her--
a piece of cake.
There was a knock on the door to his room. Doctor
Seymour took off his thick, round glasses, straightened his green plaid tie,
and hopped off to the door. He opened it to see a slightly tall boy standing
there. He had dark brown hair and eyes, and was wearing a Hikalakas shirt.
"Hey!" I said, "I'm Apollo, Triss's owner. She
stopped to get a drink. Triss should be back soo--"
"Yeah, yeah," said Triss as she pushed me aside
and entered the room. She found a cushioned chair and sat down in it.
"She's a little pushy," I said to Doctor Seymour.
"Don't worry about her," replied the psychiatrist.
"That is typical of someone not accepted by other peer groups. She should be
out of that attitude in no time."
"Well…." I stopped. He's a professional; he
can handle her. "Hey Triss," I shouted to her from the doorway. The Peophin
snapped her head around. "I'll be with Trobee this afternoon, so you will have
to walk home yourself." She rolled her eyes.
"Mr. Apollo, Triss will have a wonderful session
today, and the time will pass quickly for her. It was a pleasure to meet you,
"Likewise," I said as I shook his hand and walked
out the door and down the hallway.
"Miss Trissta--" started the Blumaroo as he walked
toward her, but Triss cut him off.
"Mister, Sir, Dude, whatever you are, my friends
call me Triss so I guess you can call me Trissta, and don't say 'Miss Trissta;'
there are too many 's' sounds in it. By the way, did anyone tell you that plaid
was out? Not to mention that a green tie doesn't go well with someone painted
yellow like you."
"Well, aren't you talkative," said Ralph as he
smiled through his teeth. "You can call me Doctor or Ralph if you would like."
"Can I call you Ralphie?"
"Uh, sure, but we really must get started with
the session. Wouldn't you be more comfortable lying on the patient's sofa over
Triss glanced at what her psychiatrist was referring
to. It sure was a sofa-- a weird looking one at that-- resembling a sleigh.
It was lavender, padded in diamond shapes with stitches and buttons attaching
the leather material. Triss's keen eyes even picked up what seemed like a wet
spot. She didn't want to know what caused it.
"I'd rather just sit here," added the Peophin,
The doctor sat down on the patient's sofa. "Very
well then," answered Ralphie, slightly annoyed. "So, your owner wrote that you
have trouble getting along in school. Is this true?"
"Not really," said Triss, "I get along with tons
of people. Mainly rich pets who give me stuff, pets who look up to me because
I can influence them, and smart pets so they do my work for me! Oh, did I mention
the hunky athletic pets? They are so dreamy!"
This wasn't what Doctor Ralph Earnest Seymour
expected. She got along with everyone that he disliked in his school days? No,
this wasn't right at all. The only thing that came out of his mouth was, "Seriously?"
Triss stared at him. "Duh! Do you think someone
that looks like me would get along with anyone else? It's just that some people
think I'm shallow." Triss stopped and looked into the mirror across the room.
"Does this make-up look okay?"
He couldn't believe it. He'd thought he could
relate to this patient. He was wrong.
The Blumaroo remembered everything that he went
through in school. He didn't regret anything, but school was miserable for him.
Triss represented everyone who picked on him, everything he was against. All
of the anger that he had held in for years and years suddenly came to the surface.
His face boiled red with anger and he couldn't control himself. The psychiatrist
lifted up his hand, and….
"Oh… my… Fyora!" shouted Triss as she looked
at herself in the mirror across the room. "When you slapped me, you smeared
my make-up!" She smiled wickedly. "I'm going to tell the secretary downstairs!"
And with that, she bolted out the door, leaving the old Blumaroo trying to catch
up and stop her. His job would be on the line if anyone found out he hit a patient.
His anger quickly turned into concern as he bolted after her. His old and tired
bones didn't help him, though.
As Triss jumped the last step on the stair case
leading up into the hallway where Doctor Ralph Earnest Seymour's office was,
the secretary at the reception desk heard her and said, "Is something wrong,
"Yeah!" she answered the aging Pteri. "Doctor
Ralphie upstairs smeared my make-up!" As if on cue, the Blumaroo appeared at
the top of the staircase. Out of breath, he began to descend the steps.
"And how did he do that, sweetie?"
"Oh yeah," said Triss, pausing. "He slapped me!"
The secretary gasped, and the doctor almost fainted.
He knew he would lose his job now. A sloppy-looking Chia that was guarding the
door took the Blumaroo by his arms and began to lead him to the exit door.
"You haven't heard the last of me, Miss Trissta!"
shouted the now unemployed doctor, as he was pushed out the door, with the Chia
taking him in the direction of the Defenders of Neopia Headquarters.
"Dear," said the secretary as Triss turned her
head to face the desk, "I suggest you head to Room 43; he will be your replacement
psychiatrist. Your file says you should have fifteen minutes left in your session.
You are O_Trissta_O, right?"
"Yep, thank you!" replied Triss as she trotted
toward her designated room.
"Hello, is anyone here?" asked Triss as she entered
the room. Across the room, a muscular yellow Tuskaninny turned around from looking
in a mirror at himself. He had straight, white teeth and the patch of hair on
the top of his head was slicked back.
"Yes, 'ello," he said in an exotic accent. Triss
could feel herself melting. "You a patent oi mine?"
She nodded and slowly began to tell him about
when she met Doctor Ralph Earnest Seymour and ended her story with what the
secretary had told her. He smiled and nodded. "I vill not be loike that, I think
we vill have a productive zession."
Triss knew she was coming back next week.