Grarrls, Kougra, and Even a Techo Weigh In On the Lupe vs. Chia Debate

by Cadmus

Hello, I am Sojobo, and I've stood silent in the face of this whole Chia debate for weeks now, I cannot do that anymore. I feel I'll be able to bring you a unique perspective on this topic, seeing as I live with 2 other accomplished hunting NeoPets (one of which has been a Gelert up until a few days ago). From what I can tell Chia owners think that Lupes should have no problem restraining themselves from hunting Chias because there's a chocolate supplement available, and while I agree with the reasons for hunting Chias that most Lupes provide, I feel they have not been provided eloquently enough to truly support the cause. That is why, here and now, I will provide you a list of reasons why Lupes have decided specifically to hunt Chia:

• Chias have no knees, they only have a stub going from their body to their feet, and since they're bottom heavy creatures this means that Chia's can literally only waddle! A creature that waddles is much easier to stalk than a creature capable of galloping.
• Almost every possible colour of Chia is too bright and flashy to ever blend into an unsuspecting background, which is ideal for us.
• Chia are everywhere! There's evidence that these little things even exist in Maraqua, can we be blamed for taking advantage of their convenience?
• Chia have positively no natural defense mechanism and they are primarily land creatures. Some people wonder why we just don't hunt Poogle, Kacheek, Aisha, or Kiko. Well Poogle have incredibly strong and sharp teeth, Kacheek only live in Meadows so only nearby Lupes can take advantage of them, tempting an Aisha by hunting it is practically praying for bad luck (not even Lupes will cross a NeoPet with a love for magic, besides, their ears are too sensitive, we can't even get close!), and Kiko live in water.
• Even the smartest Chia is smiling too big to open it's eyes. That's a major plus, and since Chia seem to have no external ear, it makes stalking them easy as pie!
• They come in a variety of flavours! I happen to like pineapples, and luckily enough there is a Pineapple Chia there to accommodate my tastes with a delicate balance of meaty and fruity flavour! It's almost like being at a luau whenever I sink my teeth into a sweet little Chia.
• Chia have a scraggly topknot of hair that they never bother to trim or fashion, often times it hangs down in their faces. So even if they could open their eyes they still couldn't see us coming!

Those are just some of the reasons Lupes hunt the pudgy Chia, and granted a lot of us do hunt Chias because we are a populous pack animal, but what about the other species? Do they eat Chia too? I asked a few of my roommates.

Hoderi (currently a Kougra, used to be a Gelert) - "I've gone from being a predator dog to being a predator cat, and I can honestly say my feelings about them haven't changed. What are Chia if not food for the carnivorous NeoPets? They're built to be hunted, and can be flavoured in a variety of ways."

Suitaro (Grarrl) - "It would be foolish not to hunt the little creatures, I will admit that occasionally I go after bigger prey for sport, but if I'm hungry then the best dish I can scrounge up is almost always a flavoured Chia."

Finally, just as a control, I decided to ask my other roommate, a Mutant Techo (and a strict herbivore) how he weighed in on the situation. Granted his mind is a bit muddled because he's a mutant, but his opinion counts just as much as yours does!

Onamuji - "GRAGGH!! I'M SIR CHEEKALOT, TAKE THAT BANDIT! NOW I'M SIR BANDIT! TAKE THAT CHEEKALOT!"
Sojobo - "You WILL tell me your opinions on carnivorous NeoPets hunting Chias!"
Onamuji - "WHAT!?!?! HOW DARE YOU SIR! THIS ISN'T BLOOMINGDALES!"
Sojobo - "Your opinions now, lizzard! Speak them or I'm unsheathing my Super Ice Sword!"
Onamuji - "OH! Why didn't you just say so? I blame them for never having developed any kind of survival skill, I'm surprised they've been able to last this long actually. Cybunny learned how to run incredibly fast, Moehog developed sharp horns to ward you guys away, heck, even Acara have learned how to dive in the water and hold their breath so you can't get to them. Meanwhile Chia just cavort around in open areas and are then surprised when carnivores pounce on them."

There you have it, even the functioning herbivores can understand the reasons for our hunting Chia. Notions that we can just abruptly stop eating them because some pet owners and Chias don't like it is absurd. For all intents and purposes, we are to Neopia what wolves are to Canada. We are a ferocious pack hunting animal that stalks our prey in groups, to tell us to stop hunting is like telling a Chia to stop smiling, completely out of the question. Granted chocolate Lupe treats are a fair treat, but we are dogs, and dogs get sick if fed too much chocolate. Our diet, since the times of Sabre-X, has always consisted of meat, and Chias are the easiest meat for us to snag.

Chias, honestly, this is nothing personal, and we are all painfully aware that there are other alternatives to hunting Chias in Neopia, but what you're asking us to do is to change our primal instinct, and that kind of thing has taken some species of NeoPets millions of years. Even if we could change, there's always other factors. Forever and a day, we will always be eating Chia.