Koug was a Kougra. He was a blue Kougra, and he loved
life. Like all Kougras, he liked Mystery Island. I mean, nothing hits the spot
like lounging around on the beach with a zeenana split, making fun of the Tiki
Tack Man's mask, and playing Kougra beach games. However, Koug was not a typical
Kougra He was different from all other Kougras in that he wondered what else
was out there. There had to be more to the great land of Neopia, he thought,
than beaches, zeenana splits, and the Tiki Tack Man. One day he decided that
the wondering and the dreaming were too much. He had to find out what else existed.
So he packed his things, said goodbye to the other Kougras, pointed and laughed
one last time at the Tiki Tack Man, and left with his petpet, Foxy the Doglefox.
Since no one really liked Koug that much, especially
the Tiki Tack Man, who noticed that Koug pointed and laughed at his mask slightly
more often than the other Kougras did, life on Mystery Island became even more
pleasant for all of its inhabitants. They even threw a small party to celebrate
after Koug was gone.
Koug and Foxy sailed on a small boat to the
Land of Meridell. There they became disheartened. All was destruction and havoc.
Everywhere they looked, there were fallen trees, burned shops, and crazy people.
One person was running around screaming, "NOOOO! I was only one measly quest
away from getting a honey potion from Illusen!" Anyway, Meridell really opened
Koug's eyes. He decided that if all Neopia was like this, he would just return
to Mystery Island, because this was just really depressing.
"If all Neopia is like this, I will just return
to Mystery Island, because this is just really depressing."
"Oh geez, Koug! Don't you ever read the Neopian
Times?" asked Foxy, and rolled his eyes.
"You know I don't."
"Well, if you did, you would know that Meridell
has recently been defeated in a horrible war by the forces of Darigan. That
is why it is all havoc and destruction."
"Oh, I see. That explains a lot, doesn't it?
Well, let's go somewhere else."
"Okay. How about Terror Mountain."
"I don't know" said Koug, "Terror Mountain sounds
kind of, well, terrifying."
"Nah, it's not that bad. Trust me."
"Okay then. To Terror Mountain! I really hope
you know what you are talking about, Foxy."
After a long journey, during which Koug and Foxy
were abducted by Grundos and their boat was raided by Krawk pirates (don't ask!),
they arrived at Terror Mountain. In the Ice Caves, as they were walking steadily
in a North- Northwest direction, they found a little cave with a wooden sign
saying, "Snowager. Come in and steal my treasure, if you dare!"
So Koug and Foxy went in, and found the humungous
ice worm asleep. Koug crept quietly to the pile of treasure, but just as he
was grabbing a delicious looking ice negg, the Snowager awoke, and roared an
incredibly loud and scary--well, an incredibly loud and scary roar.
Koug and Foxy screamed and hightailed it out
of there. Outside the cave, as they were catching their breath, Foxy noticed
a piece of paper on Koug's tail.
"You... have... a piece of... paper... on your
tail" he panted.
"What?" exclaimed Koug.
"I said you had a piece of paper on your tail."
"I heard you. When I said "what" I was using
it to portray my surprise to the people who are wasting their time reading this
"Oh, okay," said Foxy.
"WHAT?" exclaimed Koug again as he was reading
the piece of paper, "New Battledome Challenger. The Snowager will be waiting
for you in the Ice Dome."
"Really?" commented Foxy. "This is good information.
Now we know to steer clear of the Ice Dome."
"Good idea," agreed Koug.
They continued on their way and found themselves
out of the Ice Caves and on the summit of Terror Mountain. There, a green Blumaroo
passed by and said, "I hope you are having fun!" At these words, Koug and Foxy
shared a glance, which, if a glance could talk, would have said, "What the heck
was up with that?"
After the green Blumaroo incident, Koug and Foxy
got in a fight. Foxy wanted to ski down Terror Mountain, but Koug was too afraid.
Foxy then called Koug a yellow bellied Poogle-lover, which greatly upset Koug,
who responded by challenging Foxy to prove his bravery by spending a night in
the Haunted Woods. Foxy agreed, but only if Koug went with him. Soon, the two
were once again in their small boat, this time heading in a direct course to
the Haunted Woods.
As they were approaching the Haunted Woods, Foxy
began to get a little nervous. As their ship docked, he became very nervous.
As they stepped onto dry land, he became absolutely terrified.
"I have an idea!" he said, "We can stay at Cockroach
Towers. All you challenged me to do was to spend in the Haunted Woods. Cockroach
Towers is in the Haunted Woods. It all works out, and there are no Pant Devils
or Swamp Ghouls to worry about, not to mention that awful Count von Roo."
"Ha ha. Nice try. Didn't work," responded Koug
with a grin.
"Dang. Oh well. It was worth a try," said Foxy,
who tried to grin to hide the terror that was quickly becoming very apparent
on his face.
Koug and Foxy made their way into the woods and
found a small clearing around midday. They set up camp and went searching for
food, wanting to be back at camp and safely in their tent before darkness fell
upon the Haunted Woods. They did, this, and as dusk came, they were huddled
in their tent hoping that no unwanted guests would show up during the night.
As it so happens, one guest did show up during
the night. As Koug and Foxy were about to fall asleep, Koug noticed a large
blue creature out of the corner of his eyes. The creature came up to him, looked
him in the face, and said, "Boo!" Naturally Koug and Foxy screamed as they recognised
him to be the Pant Devil. They were very scared and very angry when the Pant
Devil left with all their supplies, stopping only to hand Koug a piece of paper.
Naturally, this piece of paper said, "New Battledome
Challenger! The Pant Devil will be waiting for you in the Stone Dome."
The next morning, however, Koug and Foxy were
okay. They were extremely lucky, and they knew it. During the night, they realised
how foolish they had been to camp out in the Haunted Woods. They decided they
had had enough of exploration, so they returned home to Mystery Island, to the
dismay of the other Kougras and the great disappointment of the Tiki Tack Man.
Now, you may ask, what is the moral of this story?
Well, there are many. For starters, do not point and laugh at the Tiki Tack
Man, as it will cause him to overcharge you on his great selection of Mystery
Second, always read The Neopian Times before
setting out to explore the great lands of Neopia.
Third, when on a small wooden boat, watch out
for Grundos, who will want to abduct you, and Krawk Pirates, who will want to
raid your ship.
Fourth, beware the Snowager and the Pant Devil.
This is quite easy to do, if you avoid the Snowager's Cave and the heart of
the Haunted Woods in the dead of night.
And of course, if someone dares you to spend
a night camping in the Haunted Woods, just say no!