Boochi. The baby Bruce in the new random event. He turns
innocent, unsuspecting NeoPets into infants. But what's the story behind this
master of the baby ray gun?
Al the Chia was holding a free seminar about
Lupe sociology in the Lost Desert and I decided to check it out. After all,
it was free, right?
I entered a huge room, similar to a college
classroom with stadium seating. In the front, Al was drawing a picture of a
Lupe on the blackboard. He looked ridiculous in Lost Desert robes. My Uni RubyRainbow333
was squirming in the seat next to me. "When's the show going to start?" she
"It's not a show, Ruby. It's a seminar."
"When's the seminar going to start?"
Then, I heard the sounds of a ray gun being
fired. My first thoughts were: we're under attack by Dr. Sloth! But I
looked to the front of the room and I saw that I was wrong. Very wrong.
Pink and blue lights flashed where the ray gun
had struck. Al the Chia, one of the most prominent geniuses in the Neopian world
was... shrinking before our very eyes. Then, when it seemed he could get no smaller,
his lab coat disappeared. A pacifier appeared in his mouth and... Al was a baby
Shocked, I whirled around. Boochi the dreaded
baby Bruce was in the back of the classroom, giggling maniacally. "Don't let
him get away!" a Lenny in the front row screamed.
Quick as red lightning, Ruby streaked after
the infant villain. Boochi grabbed a rope and swung out of the room. He dashed
through the desert sands.
But he was at a disadvantage. The sand was supporting
Ruby's broad camel-like hooves whereas Boochi was struggling, trying not to
get buried. It wasn't long before Ruby and I caught up with him.
"Do you know what you've just done?" I shrieked
angrily. "You've turned one of the greatest minds in Neopia into a little baby!
How could you do that?"
"Yeah, yeah, quit whining!" Boochi growled.
"It's none of your business anyway."
"You can't just get away with this!" cried a
"Watch me, pony girl." Boochi lifted his ray
Too slow! My quick little Uni was off like a
shot, dodging the pink and blue laser beams. "Try to turn me into one of your
little infants!" Rage seethed from Ruby's words. "I'll make you sorry you ever
got that gun!"
My Uni's words were brave, well spoken, but
something was happening. She was getting tired. Her limbs seemed to drag and
her muscles seemed cramped. I could hear her panting for breath and I saw her
Ruby, like many other Unis, is a sprinter. Not
a marathon runner.
Cold, hard steel touched Ruby's head. "One false
move," threatened Boochi "And our little pony will be reduced to a foal. A
crying bundle of tears and diapers." An insane grin lit up his face. "Wouldn't
that be lovely? You wouldn't be so fast then, would you horse?"
Tears streamed from my Uni's azure eyes. All
seemed lost. But Boochi had overlooked one minor detail.
"Boochi, Unis don't come in baby colour." I
grinned in triumph. Ruby kicked the ray gun out of Boochi's chubby flippers.
It shattered on a nearby rock. Then, my Uni seized the Bruce's flippers and
held them behind his back.
"Do you know what you did, pony? It'll take
me days to repair that thing!"
"You're trapped, Bruce. Ruby could outrun you
in an instant and bring you back here. We'll let you go soon. I just want you
to answer some questions," I said. "Why did you turn Al into a baby?"
Boochi gave me a look of pure ice. I never
thought that look was possible from a baby. But then again, I didn't think Boochi
was an ordinary baby. "Balthazar made me do it," he growled. "That mangy Lupe
forced me to do it."
"Did he tell you why he wanted you to do it?"
"No. I never question his orders. I'm his subordinate,
"What did he persuade you with?"
"It doesn't matter. It's none of your business."
He kicked and struggled to escape Ruby's grasp but my Uni held him tight.
"You're not an average baby, are you?"
"Of course not!" Then, Boochi did something
unexpected. He burst into tears. Not a hungry child's tears, but rather the
tears of an upset adult. He was crying, yes, but he was trying to be strong
at the same time.
"I come from an average neighbourhood in Neopia
Central. I lived in an average NeoHome with my sweetheart, Georgina. I had a
different name then, I think it was Max. But I don't know. Being a baby is messing
up my memory. But Georgina, now there was a rose in the violet field. She was
"Georgina and I had some hard times. I was laid
off from my job at the Ice Cream Factory. The Tax Beast was visiting our home
regularly, and I found myself falling into debt. We had to sell almost everything
we owned, including the antique lamps that once belonged to my mother.
"Then, the baby paint brushes came. I wanted
nothing more than to be painted baby, to be a baby, to not have to worry about
life's troubles. But unfortunately, I didn't have enough Neopoints for a book,
much less a baby paint brush.
"So, I went for a walk in the Haunted Woods
one day, just to try to get away from my problems. That's when I met Balthazar.
He made me an offer. He'd make me look like a baby if only I would... 'Experiment'
with his ray gun. Horrified, I refused. But then, Balthazar added one more thing
to the deal. Georgina. He imprisoned her and threatened to do horrible things
to her. So, now I work for Balthazar. I will always work for Balthazar. Forever."
I fell silent, shocked by the sadness of it
all. "But you don't know why he wanted Al turned into a baby?"
"No, Balthazar doesn't tell me those things."
"Very well, Boochi. You may leave."
The baby Bruce left, crying buckets.
On my way back the seminar; I bought a blue
paint brush. I used it to turn Al blue again. Ruby and I stayed to listen to
him talk, but thoughts of Boochi kept flashing through my mind.
The poor Bruce. Boochi wasn't an ordinary baby.
He gave himself, his very essence of goodness, in order to rescue his sweetheart.
He placed himself under the command of a foul and unpredictable beast. What
a thing to do.
But I guess that's what you do when you care