GAMES ROOM - Starting this Monday, a few slow-minded staff members from the
Neopets team will be staying home due to severe headaches and excruciating migraines.
Since we Neopians voted for six of these meddling fools, we have anticipated
the opening of the new game for quite some time, in fact, some Neopians were
spotted hitting Blumaroos, Myncis, and Usuls by mistake thinking they were the
six wanted staff members!
So do these so called human beings feel flattered because you voted for them?
Or do they feel flattened? We have interviewed each one of them and here is
what they had to say (before they ran away!!).
J. 'Meerca Chase' Boogie claimed that he was angry at the fact that people
even had the nerve to vote for him! "Just because Meerca Chase happens to be
a little nickname I have," he said, "doesn't mean that you should chase after
me!!!" He claims that his suave look had absolutely nothing to do with why people
voted for him.
Number Six was placed at number five for the votes. This person was unable
to speak to us, as he claimed that he was after the person who forgot to change
his from from a '6' to a '7' and to put two zeros before it.
We found out that El Pickulsaur said he was flattered that people voted for
him, after we used a translator to find out what on earth he was saying! He
claims that his charming and very handsome look had several mouse clickers determined
to vote for that rather interesting super hero!
Mr. Roboto was in a rather petrified state when we asked him a few questions.
He didn't answer any of them, he just stood there and stared straight ahead,
as if he saw Pop Tart right in front of him and knew that he was in major trouble
for doing something evil to her user lookup again. But we figured that all that
hitting on the head just got to him!
Snowflake claimed that she was elegantly delighted at the fact that users from
all over the world selected her as the second best target for this extraordinary
game! She says that she has only been knocked out twice so far, and that it
was first because she was so delighted that she got to be in the game she fainted
from pure excitement, and the second time because someone hit her three times
in a row. She seemed to glance at Adam, a fellow employee at Neopets when she
said that last part. Adam then turned unpetrified and went to run and hide in
his cubicle.
Last and certainly least we interviewed Pop Tart. We had to search for her
though, but we found her under a desk with an ice pack on her head. At first
she screamed and told us to go away, and then she realised it was us. Embarrassed,
she jumped up and hit her head again on the desk, and then crawled out and sat
in her little chair that spun in circles. Well, Adam had triggered it to spin
non stop when she sat in it so it turned and turned until it flung her up in
the air. She hit her head on the ceiling, and started to fall back down when
about 500 Neopians hit her on the head and screamed, "Yay! Ten points for me!"
We asked her how she thought about getting into the game but she only said,
"BRING BACK THE BEASTS! BRING BACK THE BEASTS TO WHACK INSTEAD!! PLEASE!!" But
because of popular demand for Whack-A-Staff-Member, we reassured her that it
would never happen!
Averaging over 60,000 plays everyday, Whack-A-Staff-Member
is a hit, literally! On Wednesday, it was the 4th most popular game in Neopia,
next to unbeatable Meerca Chase, Destruct-O-Match, and Ultimate Bullseye!
But how do the Neopets feel about all this? Just last night Blumaroos, Myncis,
and Usuls were seen protesting outside the Neopets building because of the way
they were being mistreated in the game. They claimed that the staff members
should be happy by the way they get whacked! When a Neopian whacks Pop Tart
or Number Six they cheer and say, "Yay! More points for me!" and all they get
is a teeny tiny bruise on their head! However the Neopets get big lumps and
hear "Aw...man! I hit a Neopet! Minus ten points for me!" They claimed that
the game is called Whack-A-Staff-Member, not Whack-A-Poor-Cute-Little-Neopet-And-Get-Points-Taken-Away-For-It!
They also demanded that when they create version 2 of Whack-A-Staff-Member,
that they be removed and never put back in the game again...EVER!
The staff members were outraged at the angry Neopets! "Sure," they said, "you
get yelled at if you get hit, but at least they try and avoid you!! But they
are actually trying to hit us!!!! Do you know how that makes us feel???"
Around the office the staff and the Neopets are not getting along at all. Today
a Blumaroo snickered at El Pickulsaur when he fell back on his chair, and the
evil Neopet was so mean to him he didn't even help him get back up! And just
last night a Usul was found with a mallet hitting Snowflake and Roboto constantly
until Pop Tart got a hold of the mallet and fought back! Except, instead of
hitting the Usul, she accidentally helped continue hitting Snowflake and Roboto.
Things are really out of control! Computers are being smashed to the floor,
artwork is being torn up and the beasts that were removed from the game are
stinking up the place!
But let's just look at the bright side! People are just loving the game! It's
fun, exciting, and there is always just someone waiting to be hit! The only
bad thing is that everyone in the office is shaken up, not just the chosen six.
For they have just heard something so frightening, so horrifying that it scares
them silly! Yes, it's this one little sentence that is driving them insane and
can be found at the page where you play the game: "We will be adding more staff
members to this game very soon, so watch this space!" | 
