HAUNTED WOODS - Everyone keeps talking about the war that is coming to Neopia
and the return of Dr. Sloth and EEEK! how scared we all should be about
that. Okay, maybe not everyone is talking about that. My sister is really
pumped up for the new plushie keyrings that are going on sale in Limited Too.
But for those of us who actually CARE whether or not there is going to be a
war, I have to say I think maybe we've been looking at the wrong bad guy. Maybe
Dr. Sloth isn't the ONLY guy around who wants to take over Neopia. At least
this month, anyway.
Some strange coincidences have popped up recently in Neopia that really worry
me. The first thing that put a wrinkle of concern on my forehead happened a
couple of weeks ago. Hubrid Nox was added to the Gallery of Evil. Okay, maybe
this doesn't sound like a big deal, but scarier bad guys are roaming Neopia
and aren't in it. A guy like Florg for example, who has not only been sitting
around devouring Petpets, he has been giving Petpet cooking recipes to the Turmaculus
and Balthazar. And if a guy that eats sweet, fuzzy little Petpets isn't nasty
enough to make it into the Gallery of Evil, then you gotta figure Hubrid Nox
has to be one really despicable dude.
This is what the Gallery of Evil has to say about Hubrid Nox:
This evil, nefarious, scheming Chia makes his home atop a desolate mountain
in the Haunted Woods. He lives alone, as he prefers his devilish plans not to
be interrupted. Whether its conquering just one city, or the whole of Neopia,
whether he uses ghosts, aliens, zombies or mutants - Hubrid has an evil plan
for every day of the week. Hubrid's arch enemy is the Wocky known as MAGAX:
Destroyer. In fact their conflict is so famous in the world of Neopia they star
in their very own game!
I think it was the statement "Whether its conquering... the whole of Neopia...
Hubrid has an evil plan for every day of the week" that made me a teensy
weensy bit suspicious. Maybe I'm way off the mark here, but I'm willing to go
out on a limb and say that Hubrid Nox is planning to conquer the whole of Neopia.
So how is he going to accomplish this horrible, terrible, rotten, not-very-nice
task? Well, I have a couple of ideas about that, which brings us to those coincidences
I was talking about earlier but you have probably forgotten all about me mentioning
but I haven't, so I will. Mention them, that is.
Coincidence Number One
Hubrid Nox has been added to the Gallery of Evil. Oops. Mentioned that already.
Coincidence Number Two
The Ghost Paint Brush suddenly appears in Neopia.
Coincidence Number Thr... what? You want me to explain Coincidence Number
Two? Fine. Be that way.
For those of you who weren't paying close attention to what the Gallery of
Evil had to say about Hubrid Nox, go back and look again. It states Hubrid's
plan to take over Neopia using GHOSTS. And that's not the only place it says
that. Check out the game "MAGAX: Destroyer". Here is what the game has to say:
"Another vile plot has been concocted by the evil Hubrid Nox. Evil ghost
Neopets that rise from the dead - they will make me an invincible army!!!! Soon
the whole of Neopia will be my slaves!! A little too cliché? Not
for Hubrid, that's the way he likes it... but this time he has met his match...
In this game you control MAGAX: Destroyer, a protector of good with a dark background.
Who knows why he has sworn to get revenge on Hubrid this time, but lets hope
Just a game, huh? Maybe. But the Gallery of Evil says the game is based on
a real conflict between Magax and Hubrid Nox. And if Magax and Hubrid are REALLY
enemies, then that means Hubrid Nox is REALLY planning to take over Neopia with
a ghost army.
So, is the introduction of the Ghost Paint Brush just a jolly new colour for
the "spooky season" as it says in the news? Don't we already have a Halloween
Paint Brush for that? Where did this thing come from anyway? My guess is Hubrid
Nox has been hiding out in his desolate mountain-top in the Haunted Woods developing
an evil Paint Brush.
I know what you're going to say. You're going to say, "Do you think they'll
come out with a Krawk plushie keyring anytime soon?" The answer is NO and let's
stay on the subject, okay?
This is what I think Hubrid's diabolical plan is. He created a magical Ghost
Paint Brush to turn Neopets into ghosts. Why? I dunno, he likes ghosts. For
some odd reason he wants an army of ghosts. He's a NUTCASE, okay? Anyway, he
then scattered the Ghost Paint Brushes all over Neopia for unsuspecting and
innocent Neopians to find and say, "Ooooooo I found a Paint Brush! I think I'll
use it on my unsuspecting and innocent Pet!"
But no one really knows what happens to Pets that are turned into ghosts.
For all we know it could make them evil mindless zombie mutant alien ghosts.
Which is exactly what the Gallery of Evil says Hubrid Nox likes to use to carry
out his evil plans every day of the week. Scared yet? I know I was back at Coincidence
Number One and there is still a...
Coincidence Number Three
A couple of weeks ago 20,000 Jetsams mysteriously showed up and rushed out
immediately to grab up new owners. AH HA!
What do you mean, "So what?" Okay, fine. I'll explain that one too.
The first Neopet to be the victim of a Ghost Paint Brush was the Moehog. That's
easy to understand. It doesn't take a lot of work to change a Moehog into a
creepy ANYTHING. Hubrid Nox wanted to make sure the Ghost Paint Brush would
work so he started with something easy.
The second Neopet to be rendered "undead" was the Shoyru. Wow! What a brilliant
stroke of genius that was! There are more Shoyrus than any other kind of Pet.
If you want a BIG army, it's a good idea to have a LOT of guys in it.
The third Neopet to be made a ghost was the JETSAM. Jetsams are famous for
being bad tempered and not liking too much about Neopia anyway, so Hubrid probably
figured they were the perfect generals for his new ghost army. But I guess he
decided there weren't enough of them so he went out and FOUND MORE. If nothing
else, bringing more Jetsams to Neopia is enough by itself to make Hubrid Nox
evil in my book. And now practically every day a new kind of Pet falls victim
to the Ghost Paint Brush and Hubrid Nox's sinister plan to take over Neopia.
Okay, maybe I am just imagining things. But what if I'm right? What if all
this talk about Dr. Sloth returning is really a rumour being spread by Hubrid
Nox so we don't see what this vile vampire Chia is up to? And if you're still
not convinced, just remember this one little thing. The anniversary of the day
the first Chia was born is coming up on November 14th. Sounds like a good day
for a CHIA to take over Neopia to me!
Note: Neopets does not confirm the truth of a single word of this article.
Okay, they do confirm ONE fact. Plushie keyrings ARE coming to Limited Too soon.
Last one there is a rotten Nox!