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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 25th day of Hunting, Yr 21
The Neopian Times Week 60 > Short Stories > The Bagguss Incident

The Bagguss Incident

by fivetailfox

20th day of Gathering
    
Hello, I am Bagguss the green Kiko. I hate Bagguss, but my owner LOVES them. That's the reason why I'm named after a gaseous fruit.

     "Hey, Bagguss!" my owner cried, "It's time for breakfast!"

     "What are we having?" I yelled back, but knowing the answer...

     "Bagguss!"

     Bagguss... the bane of my existence! I've been forced to eat them for the four months I've been around, but this time I'm striking back! I waddled my way to the kitchen, glaring at the Bagguss-coloured walls as I entered.

     "Here you go, sweetums! A nice Bagguss to start the day!" Windie, my owner, chirped as I sat down.

     Staring at it, I said, "YUCK! I'm not eating one of those!" Windie stared, aghast at what I just said, but I kept on going, "They should be called 'GAGguss' they're so awful!!"

     At this, my owner went red in the face, and I started to think I might have gone too far, and she might ground me. I was wrong.

     "GO!" she cried! I just stared for a while. Then I managed to stammer out, "O-out? Out t-to where?" I knew by then that my owner had a bad temper, but I'd never seen her THIS mad!

     "Just... out!" She started to push me out the door, eventually shoving me onto the porch.

     "But... but were do I go?!" I sniffled, as I was starting to cry.

     "Why not the POUND!!!!!" she slammed the door in my face. Then I started to think, did she mean it? Was she really abandoning me? I waddled away from the NeoHome I grew up in, and wandered the streets thinking.

     Eventually I ended up in front of the Pound. It was getting dark, and it looked like a big monster from my point of view. I decided that Windie WAS serious about abandoning me, so I went in. I went to the desk, hoping that Dr_Death wasn't around that day... well, he was.

     "Hmmm... what is this? A Kiko, but no owner. Might I enquire as to why you are here?" Dr_Death said in a rather annoyed tone. I figured that he had read that nasty column in The Neopian Times about him, because I knew he was grumpy, but not THAT grumpy!

     "Um... you're Dr_Death, aren't you?" I said, feeling rather awkward under his stare, like a bug under a magnifying glass.

     He sighed, "Yes... I'm Dr_Death. Now, what do you want?!"

     "Uh, m-my owner di-disowned me..." I whimpered, starting to cry again.

     "Oh, geez... not another one... What is it this time? Your name wrong? And were is your... I suppose, EX-owner?" he said, sneering at me. He must have a lot of Neopets come in alone...

     "I-it's not my name, sir..." saying though my tears, "I don't like Bagguss..." I was starting to regret this more and more...

     "BAGGUSS?! This is all about Bagguss? HAHAHAHAHAH!! What a hoot! But I can't blame you, Bagguss IS pretty disgusting..."

     At least I know someone agreed with me.

     "Okay, kid. If you know your owner wants to disown you, I'll put you in." The yellow Techo pulled out a clipboard, and started asking me some questions.

     "Okay, what is you owner's name?" he started.

     "Windiewivvle, sir..." Chalking that on the paper, he continued, "And what is your name?"

     Blushing, I said "Bagguss, sir..."

     "B... Bagguss? Heh... Uh, yes, Bagguss..." Now you can see why I hate my name, too.

     He continued to ask questions, and I continued to answer. But before Dr_Death could ask the last question, Windie came bustling through the door.

     "Hey! That's MY Kiko!!" she blared at the Techo, and picked me up, squeezing me till I couldn't breath. "Stop this at once!" she commanded Dr_Death, who immediately dropped the clipboard, and crumpled the form he was filling out before.

     "Okay, Bagguss. Let's go home," my owner said, carrying me outside and towards our NeoHome After a little silence, we said "Sorry," at the same time.

     "Eh? You shouldn't say sorry, Windie! It's my fault!" I cried, surprised that the Bagguss-fiend of an owner would say sorry about this sort of thing.

     "No, no, Bagguss, it's my fault! I should have kept my temper in check..." looking down at me, she said, "I'm sorry..."

     By the time we got to our NeoHome, we were giggling about how Dr_Death acted when my owner stormed in.

     "... and did you see his face? Ah, man! I wish I had my camera!"

     "Me, too! I never would have guessed that Techos could go from yellow to white!"

23rd day of Gathering
    
"Hey, Windie?"

     "Yes, Bagg?"

     "Can I have a brother?" Boy, did she not expect that at breakfast (Faerie Toast and Butter and Sausages, my favourite!) she nearly choked! After a few pats on the back, and a Bottle of Water, she asked, still a bit surprised,

     "Uh... a brother? Well, I dunno..." but then she looked at me, with my puppy face on, and she broke into it.

     "Okay... but what should we name him?" she asked.

     "Anything but a name of a food!" I begged.

The End

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