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OUTSIDE THE NEOPIAN TIMES OFFICE - I'm proud to say I'm most likely one of the
biggest unrecognized Neopian Times fans! Of course, I may not be, as I haven't
recognized any other unrecognized Neopian Times fans.
Anyway, here's to all of you never-been-published, not in any Neopian Times
guilds, constantly rejected, author-worshipping, I-left-the-Neopian-writers-board-because-it-didn't-have-anything-to-do-with-the-Neopian-Times,
Snowflake, Weewoo, and Dung loving, =just plain wannabe-writer fellow fans.
Without us, the NT would be nothing. NOTHING!
Well, maybe not nothing, but it wouldn't be as...Special.
Right. Special.
Unlike all of you published writers, we have been content to just read the
Times, thinking that maybe someday, our articles would be published.
We never managed to break into the writing community, though we know as much
about it as any actual writer.
THIS TIME HAS COME TO AN END.
We are just as vital to the Times as the writers, editor, artists, and sponsors!
Well, maybe not.
Still, we're almost as vital to the Times as the writers, editor, artists,
and sponsors!
We deserve recognition!
How can you tell if you're one of us?
1) You remember when the News Brief was the Financial Report.
2) You read the News Brief.
3) You know who writes the News Brief.
4) You can remember a time before the NT was Neopia's Fill in the Blank News
Source.
5) You know that the NT is Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source.
6) You know why Issue 3 has been itemized.
7) You love the retired Mr. Shankly as much as you love Snowflake.
8)Despite not being a member of the writers forum, you know the significance
of White Weewoos.
9) You can remember WHY Mr. Shankly was famous for his Dungaliciousness.
10) You wish you were Tydans.
11) Slothy is NOT evil. Just misunderstood. And evil.
12) This article reminds you of the "100 ways to tell if you're addicted to
the Times" series.
13) You have several unfinished series on your computer.
14) As soon as the submission form came out, you just HAD to send in a piece,
even if it wasn't any good.
15) You use "Meep!" in everyday speech.
16) You've visited your favorite author's website. Repeatedly.
17) You wish you owned a radioactive tap-dancing pineapple with optional drink
holders.
18) You've tried to practice dungism.
19) Funny, you didn't realize dung smelled THAT bad...
20) Forget Judge Hog, your favorite superhero is the Dung Hero!
21)You painted your bottled Light Faerie brown.
22)You wondered why there were so many hitchhikers references in issue number
75.
23) You know which comic LaurenSama drew before Nonsensical Verbiage.
24) You think you know what Nonsensical Verbiage means.
25) Moo is a fuzzy sheep.
26) You wondered why Four Frogs' plot was never finished.
27)This article DEFINITELY reminds you of the "100 ways to tell if you're addicted
to the Times" series.
28) In fact, you're starting to think that Lindzerin226 ripped Simsman24000
off.
29) You're still reading this, despite the inherent ripp-offishness.
30) You figure that since the "100 ways to tell..." series rocked, it's okay
that Lindz has no original ideas. We needed another one anyway.
31) You figured out that the office was in the Deep Catacombs.
32) You wonder why the Deep Catacombs are called deep, as they aren't any deeper
than your typical underground community.
33) You know that RoseMadder is not the name of the Pound Uni.
34) You still refer to her as "Rose" anyway.
35) You're still begging Donna to release "Neopian Briefs."
36) L*U*P*E Blue is over?
37) Legolas (comic character) is pretty, oh so pretty...
38) You wonder why that in Petpet Kindergarten, all the petpets were named
after their species.
39) I mean, if there was a second Warf, what would they call him?
40)You wonder why Cheesy Neos was called Cheesy Neos if Cheesy Neos weren't
even mentioned in the comic.
41) You know what Chiropteric means.
42) And you ain't tellin'.
43) Not even for a white Weewoo.
44)You wrote a Meridell versus Darigan article.
45) You liked the Old Neopia.
46) Of course, you mostly know about it from A Neopian Christmas Carol.
47) The Neopia Yet To Come looks eerily familiar...
48) You know why Toilets were introduced into Neopia.
49) The Evil Eye didn't make sense to you, either.
50) You realized that most of these were about comics.
51) Whatever happened to the articles?
52) And the short stories.
53) Don't forget the series!
54) And why does Donna do the Editorial when she isn't the editor?
55) And why doesn't she tell us anything?
56) Seriously. If you ask her about the new pet, she'll just say "I promise
you it will be good! :)"
57) We love you Donna, but we want information!
58) Hey, they retired Cheesy Neos!?
59) Did Angel_the_Faerie ever get her kiln back?
60) Yes, she lost her kiln.
61) BRAAAINS!
62) Jelly beans WILL grow into pretty flowers.
63) Hey, why are there so many characters named Moo?
64) And only one of them is a Kau.
65) Hey, this article isn't even making sense any more!
66) Sense is overrated.
67) It still isn't uncommon to have dreams of asparagus.
68) In fact, you have dreams of asparagus.
69) Life is still not your friend.
70) Panty isn't evil either. Just misunderstood. And evil.
71) Hey, that's Slothy in Little Neopia!
72) You ARE the Amazing Talking cheese.
73) Feed Florg is NOT just a game. It's EVIL!
74) Unlike Slothy and Panty, who are NOT evil.
75) You read this entire thing.
If you answered yes to at least some of these questions, you're one of us.
Even if they weren't questions. Or even really had to do with the Times. Or
just... Congratulations!
If not, you need to go through the back issues of the Times.
Or just pester a writer into telling you everything they know.
They still won't tell you what Chiropteric means.
(Did anyone else notice that this article has veered completely off-topic?
If this was a thread in the HC, it'd be reported by now.)
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