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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 25th day of Eating, Yr 21
The Neopian Times Week 139 > Articles > Local... Talentless? An Interview with Moehawk

Local... Talentless? An Interview with Moehawk

by tracypaper12

A couple of days ago, I was sat in my Neohome listening to my favourite Moehawk sound clip (The best of Moehawk, Volume II) on my Space Station WalkMynci, whilst tuning my Moehawk Guitar, and contemplating where to stick my 17th Moehawk poster, when suddenly a thought struck me. I knew hardly anything about them.

I mean, for a rabid Moehawk fangirl, my rabid fangirl knowledge was considerably lacking. In a fit of blind panic and desperation, I quickly consulted my Moehawk Trading Card (special edition holographic).

This Moehog has it all style, sensation and an army of dedicated fans who love to hear him wail.

Above the text was a picture of everybody's favourite red Moehog, a die hard audience behind him.

In search of the rabid fangirl knowledge I desired, I grabbed my partner in crime, Lucy, and headed on over to the Tyrannian Concert Hall. Just we were about to enter, we were stopped by the doorman.

Doorman: GO AWAY! - You need a ticket to get in here. NO FREE ADMISSION!

Tracy: Hey, how come you don't speak Tyrannian? I thought it was the native language here...

Doorman: Look, I graduated college. Nobody gets in without a ticket.

Lucy: We just came to give Moehawk an interview...

Tracy: Just let me handle this, Lucy. *ahem* Ugga ugga lets us ugga in or I'll ugga ugga tie you in a ugga pretzel knot. Yo momma's so ugga, she ugga ugga...

Suddenly, unprovoked, the doorman started chasing us! The nerve of it all...

Lucy: I thought you had a degree in Tyrannian?!

Tracy: Degree? I meant dictionary. See, look at all the pretty translations...

Lucy: I bet you have a degree in stupidity.

Tracy: T'was my major.

Lucy: Let's just forget it. Only some unbelievably lucky coincidence could save this article from the depths of...

Strangely enough, at this point, an unbelievably lucky coincidence occurred! We ran into Moehawk!

Chad: Hey there! We just came out back to...


Chad: Yes, yes I am. Could you please stop drooling on my foot?

There was much hyperventilating on my part at this stage...

Lucy: Wow, we're so lucky to have caught you! We were hoping to catch an interview with you and the band.

Chad: Of course, anything to help shamelessly promote the cause! ... I mean, please the fans. Yeah, the fans.

Lucy: Would you mind giving us a quick introduction of the band members?

Chad: Oh of course not! Well anyway, the band is made up of the three of us. My full name is Chadwick Von Drumblefrooks, and I am lead singer and guitarist in the band. Naturally.

Tracy: ...I'm inhaling the same air as Moehawk!

Chad: Brad here, my brother, full name Bradley Von Drumblefrooks, plays the twiddly little guitar keyboard thing.

Lucy: Is that it's real name?

Brad: I like to call it Cedric.

Lucy: ...Oook.

Chad: Last, we have Norman. He's not as cool as us, as his name doesn't rhyme.

Norman: It's the truth, yo.

Chad: Anyway, he plays the drums, and he's also related. He's our cousin.

Lucy: Thanks for that! Anyway, I'll move onto some questions... What kind of childhood did you all have?

Brad: Me and Chad here had a fairly upper-class childhood. We lived in a wealthy estate, with hundreds of servants tending to our every need.

Tracy: Why did you opt for a more rock and roll lifestyle?

Chad: Well, we first got a taste of music when our parents took us to see a Neopian symphony orchestra...

Lucy: You liked it so much you decided to make music for yourself?

Brad: Oh contrare! We HATED it! It made us realise how poor the music scene in Neopia really was. We felt it was time for some action! We got Norman, who at the time was living in the Neopia Suburbs...

Norman: It's the truth, yo.

Brad: ...And started Moehawk!

Lucy: Wow, that's a pretty epic cause. What did your parents think?

Chad: Our parents hated it. In fact, they still do. They say it's a disgrace to the family name.

Tracy: Von Drumblefrooks?

Brad: However, we're not really bothered. It's our life, and we can live it as we please. And music makes us happy.

Chad: And rich.

Brad: And happy.

Lucy: When did you hit the big time?

Norman: Round about this time last year. We were circuiting the Meridell at the time, trying to pick up a bit of a fanbase, when the Concert hall talent scout saw us perform. After the show, he offered us a permanent spot at the Concert Hall. That's the truth, yo.

Tracy: Hey look! If I stand over here, I can see Moehawk in PROFILE VIEW! Wooooooo!

Chad: Are you going to edit her out?

Lucy: I'd love to, but unfortunately, she's the one who holds the pen in our household.

Brad: And the degree in crazy, by the looks of it.

Tracy: Stupidity! STUPIDITY!

Lucy: Tracy, can we move on?

Chad: And can we move off the jacket? It's 100% cotton.

Tracy: Only if you give me free Moehawk merchandise.

Chad: Err... here you go, it's an Official Moehawk Restraining Order!

Lucy: MOVING on... what's the best thing about being famous?

Brad: I'd have to say pleasing the fans...

Chad: And the money...

Brad: ...And pleasing the fans. It makes you feel great to know you've made someone's day better with your songs.

Norman: That's the truth, yo.

Lucy: Is that your catchphrase then, Norman. I notice you say it a lot.

Chad: No, he's just weird.

Lucy: Ahh, okay. Sorta like Tracy, then!

Brad: But less rabid.

Chad: And... fangirly.

Lucy: Finally, what are your plans for the future?

Chad: Plans? We just plan to rock, roll and basically have a good time!

Norman: That's the tru...

Brad: Norman? Just... go away.

Norman: Wuurd.

Chad: It's been nice to meet you, but I wish I could say the same for your friend here...

Tracy: Wow, it's even a signed restraining order. The guys at the Moehawk fan club with be green with envy!

Lucy: Back at you, hope to see more of you!

We then left Tyrannia, and headed back to the Neohome where I went to find a pen and some paper and started to write up the article and then I finished and found myself here and I guess I should really pause for some breath at some point...

Lucy: QUICK! Call the hospital, Tracy's forgotten to breathe again!


So there you have it. The scoop on Tyrannia's favourite rock band. Then again, Tyrannians are rather partial to their rocks. After all, they are permanently stuck in the stone age. Hehe, anywho, I thoroughly recommend taking a trip to go watch them. This is Tracy, signing off, hiding under her desk from the Pun Police.

NOTE: A big thanks to... wait, I don't have anyone to thank! I feel so alone :( Anyway, feedback is always appreciated. Neomail me, you know you want to ;)

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