ROXY'S DESK-Slothy, why don't you give up? It's obvious that in this rivalry,
I shall be the champion. No one can defeat a stylish Shoyru that offers way
better advice than some alien from Planet No-Where. Where are you from any ways?
Do they all dress as bad as you on that planet? You're on Neopia now, Slothy,
get a clue! Buy something besides, a black trench coat! Trust me, it won't kill
you! As The Return of Sloth gets closer I am getting more and ready
to face down my rival and cure him of his unfashionable nature. Now that I've
advised Slothy in the world of fashion, I can get on to the advice that really
matters. The advice to and for the readers!
Dear Roxy: I don't know what kind of petpet I should get! I am thinking
about a Babaa or Noil, but they are too expensive! What kind of petpet do you
Dear Unsure Aisha: There are a lot of pretty cheap petpets in circulation,
you just need to do your research. The Shop Wizard is a great help when doing
your research and he'll help you find a cheap price A good petpet and cheap
petpet to get could possibly be one that was given out as a Advent Calendar
prize, they are usually very cute and cheap. Whatever you do, don't buy an Angelpuss.
Trust me, they are nothing but trouble! -Roxy
Why don't you mention your brothers in your articles? -Curious About Your
Dear Curious About Your Family:
I have mentioned my brothers in my articles. I've mentioned Kudio, a pawful
of times. He's the wizard, fellow Times writer, champion Trick-or-Treater and
Electric Bruce. He likes to do interviews, he had a really great interview that
I must have read a million times but strangely I can't remember who he interviewed.
It's really strange, almost like he cast a spell on the article. I don't think
I've ever really talked about my other brother, Oke though. Oke is a shy, Halloween
Kougra that enjoys skimboarding and wishes to be accepted for what he is on
the inside. He's a really sweet Kougra, deep down past the claws and fangs.
He hates being in the spotlight and is probably burning with embarrassment as
I mention him now. In addition to my brothers, I have a sister named Queenie.
She's a Faerie Kougra and so close to perfection it's scary. She loves to go
to Battledome and surf at her favorite spot, Omara Bay. I hope that's enough
family history you for this article. I guess I'll save more information about
the family petpets for the next article. -Roxy
I think I am going insane. The other day, I was having a conversation with
my plastic Lenny. Is my insanity curable?
Are you sure it was plastic? I know of a Pink Lenny that gets paid to stand
out in front of a friend's lawn as a decoration. Maybe your owner hired the
same Lenny? -Roxy
How are you feeling about being more intelligent than Sloth?
Quite good, thanks for asking. -Roxy
I want to teach my Zafara to do the Hula. What color grass skirt should I get
her? I want a color that doesn't clash with her Striped fur. -An Islander
Wearing A Purple Hat
Dear An Islander Wearing A Purple Hat:
A blue grass skirt will not clash and totally bring out the color of your Neopet's
eyes. In addition, great choice with the purple hat, it's all the rage on Mystery
Dear Roxy: Why?
-A Fellow Striped Shoyru
Dear A Fellow Striped Shoyru: Why not? -Roxy
My friend is a Faerie Uni and she has been acting bossy and gets mad easily
lately. I still wanna be friends with her it's just that I wish she'd change
her attitude. What should I do? -A Depressed Cybunny
Dear A Depressed Cybunny:
You should try and talk to your friend and tell her how you feel. If she's
a true friend she'll know that you're only talking to her because you care and
want her to improve as a Neopet. Try talking to her numerous times and if that
doesn't work you can try to snap her back to reality. You can show her how she
changed by acting out what she does to you. Be careful though, you don't want
to come across too harsh or mean. Just show her exactly what you feel. If she
still doesn't change or attempt to try and be nicer to you then, you are just
going to have to say goodbye. Sometimes friends change and there is nothing
you can do to help that. You'll just have to remember the good times. It's sounds
really awful and it is but, it's reality. -Roxy
Dear Roxy: I was taking a trip to Faerieland the other day when I
discovered that the fine Water Faerie that runs the Healing Springs has not
been bestowed with a name! Since most of the other Faeries have been given names,
it only seems logical that this astonishingly beautiful Faerie be given a name
as well. After all, she heals a myriad of pets daily
along with offering various Potions and a few Weapons for sale! I'd like to
see that Snow Faerie, Taelia, do that! Anyway, Roxy, this is my question: What
name do you believe this stunningly generous Faerie be given? -Outraged
Healing Faer---erm...Concerned Kau
Dear Concerned Kau: I'd have to agree. She really is quite a nice
Faerie and does a lot of work. I believe that the Water Faerie does deserve
a name and that we should send requests to wonderful, Pop Tart and Editorial
section to let her know. I'm not sure what the Water Faerie should be named
but I think she should be named whatever she desires. I don't believe a simple
commoner like ourselves should name the Faerie but give that honor to the wonderful
Pop Tart and other Neopet Staff Members to take care of. -Roxy
Dear Roxy: What in LalaLand is Sloth? Is he (or it) a giant talking
asparagus or a big green chicken? -Tooth Guts
Dear Tooth Guts: Dr. Frank Sloth is a badly dressed evil genius who
cannot give advice. I have no idea what species he is, I don't think anyone
knows. All I know is that no one that ugly or that evil can be a Neopet.
Her Royal Highness, Fyora would like you to write more complimenting things
about her. She would also like you to stop using her as an example of her when
talking about Dr. Frank Sloth.
-The Faerie Queen's Royal Assistant
Dear Faerie Queen's Royal Assistant:
Wow! I got a letter from almost Fyora herself. This is so cool! Well, I never
meant to use Her Royal Highness is any bad context and I'm deeply sorry if she
misunderstood me. I don't tend to write a whole article about Fyora but I do
have to say that the Faerie Queen can dress. Is there any way that I could score
an invite to the next Royal Ball? -Roxy
What's your theory on how the Neopian planet was formed? -Deep Thinker
Dear Deep Thinker:
The planet of Neopia was formed by magic, of course. Magic is every where in
Neopia and it makes sense that magic created it. -Roxy
My Flotsam doesn't like Bagguss. I don't mean he just doesn't like it, he despises
it! I, personally, think it's delicious! How could someone hate bagguss like
Lupes hate Chias? -Owner Of A Bagguss Hater
Dear Owner Of A Bagguss Hater: Every Neopet is different. Some Neopet
hate Borovan, shutter at the thought. It's impossible for a Borovan lover like
me to understand how someone couldn't like the wonderful drink and I understand
where you are coming from. You just need to remember that everyone in Neopia
is different. Just because your Flotsam doesn't enjoy the same food you do doesn't
make him a bad Neopet. Besides, if we were all exactly the same, Neopia would
be quite a boring place. -Roxy
What do you like doing besides giving advice?
-The Best Swimmer In The World
Dear The Best Swimmer In The World: I like to swim, too. I enjoy
shopping for clothes and fabrics. I even design and create some of my own clothes.
I've always been fond of dancing and I like going to YBIC concerts. Where's
a better place to dance at? Hehe. I like to go snowboarding and skiing with
my entire family; surfing and snorkeling with my little sister, Queenie and
her best friend, Rikku. I love to read books and The Neopian Times. I enjoy
visiting exotic lands and fighting one-player Battledome matches. I like to
do a lot of things in my spare time but giving advice is still and will always
be my favorite thing to do. -Roxy
To submit your question/problem to be answered by Roxy, simply
send a Neomail to roxycaligirl101. All messages must be appropriate with proper
spelling and grammar. Please put the subject as "Dear Roxy."
Inappropriate, tasteless, and repeated messages will be
deleted, so please don’t waste your and my time. Please don't send
problems that have already been solved by Roxy. Due to an overwhelming amount
of messages, not all of them can be answered by Roxy. All messages
are subjected to editing and can be published. So don't submit something if you
don't want to see it in the Neopian Times.
Author’s Note: Thanks everyone for their love and support to Roxy's column.
Please don't stop sending those problems, Roxy looks forward to sorting her Neomail
every day! May the Borovan always be with ya'll.