|
A MESSY DESK - Hello again! It's time for another fantastic article written by
the world of Neopia's most talented and adorable Shoyru, me, Roxy! I'm the striped
Shoyru who gives the best advice, from petpets to beauty products. I'm always
here to offer my advice, unless I am on vacation that is.
Dear Roxy: My pets and I have these weird dreams of a world made out
of Jelly... is this normal? -Dreaming of Jelly
Dear Dreaming of Jelly: That is certainty not normal. Why is all
the weirdos like to send me letters? You should be locked up in the dungeons
of the Darigan Citadel. Don't worry, insanity loves company. Don't worry, wacko
Number Five and you can share your crazy ideas. It won't be too bad, I heard
the dungeons of the Darigan Citadel have the best prison food in all of Neopia.
-Roxy
Dear Roxy: My Uni used to be like most Unis. She had pink dresses,
a pink room and a liking for everything pink! Lately, I've been worried about
her, she painted her self green. She sold all her pink things to buy new ones
in only black. She has completely changed with no warning! - A Worried Crazy
Angelpuss
Dear A Worried Crazy Angelpuss: I am sorry that your Uni has changed
with no warning, but to be honest there had to be some signs. She could have
changed because this how her new friends act or she could be trying to get your
attention. You should talk your Uni and ask her why the change. Unis are always
pretty open with their feelings, you will be able to find out soon enough. Don't
worry, unless she starts robbing the Neopian Bank, I don't think you have too
much to worry about. Besides, black is always in style. -Roxy
Dear Roxy: I want to get a fourth Neopet. The only problem is, I
can't decide what kind to get. I was thinking maybe a Shoyru, Poogle, Krawk,
or an Elephante. Yesterday, I decided on an Aisha but then I saw those cute
JubJubs... HELP! -Oh Look There's A Uni
Dear Oh Look There's A Uni: Forget those other pets, adopt a Shoyru!
-Roxy
Dear Roxy: I have a Gelert who chews on electric wires as a hobby.
We've spent more then 50,000 NP on treatments for Shock-A-Lots, and his petpet
Anubis is beginning to copy him. How do I stop my Gelert from performing his
favorite trick? -Getting Zapped
Dear Getting Zapped: You need to get an old empty can of Hairspray,
you can probably find one at the Meridell Rubbish Dump or you can go through
your neighbor's garbage. In addition to the empty can of Hairspray, you need
a couple of bottles of Dr. Backwash. Once you have your supplies, clean the
can of Hairspray out and pour the Dr. Backwash in. Spray the Dr. Backwash on
all the wiring in your house, especially his favorite spots to chomp. Once your
Gelert gets a taste of the disgusting covered wires, he'll never want to chew
them again. Keep a close eye out, you don't want him to go after your best friend's
electric system next. -Roxy
Dear Roxy: I was just wondering if you actually answer the Dear Roxy
questions or if that notice about Neomailing with questions was a joke?
-Mr. Wants-To-Know-If-Questions-Are-Actually-Answered
Mr. Wants-To-Know-If-Questions-Are-Actually Answered: If you couldn't
tell by now it wasn't a joke! -Roxy
Dear Roxy: I was exploring the jungles of Mystery Island, and have
accidentally fallen into quicksand. I'm up to my waist in it, and I'm scared--
how do I get it out?! I know how hard it is to get quicksand stains out! Oh
no, now it's up to my neck! I'll never get this stuff out of my shirt! -Not
A Quicksand Fan
Dear Not A Quicksand Fan: I will tell you a secret Koi seaweed soda
gets almost any stain you can think of out. Not only is it a delicious drink,
it's the perfect stain remover. I am not sure which Koi invented it, but I think
they are a genius. Any ways, I'm sorry that you've fallen into quicksand. You
shouldn't fight it, your flailing will only make you sink faster. Stay calm
and look for a vine of anything that you can use to climb out. A call for help
couldn't hurt there are plenty native Kougras and Myncis in the jungle that
will help you escape the quicksand, I must warn you that some of them do charge.
To get out of that staining nightmare, I'd pay a Kougra a hundred Neopoints
any day. -Roxy
Dear Roxy: My Kyrii won't change his hairstyle. I think mohawks aren't
good for his age, what should I do? -Tyrannian Fisherman
Dear Tyrannian Fisherman: Your Kyrii has chosen to wear his certain
a way, there is nothing wrong with that. Looks cannot tell you who a Neopet
really is, there is nothing wrong with the way he looks. As long as he keeps
out of trouble and keeps up with school work, I don't see why he can't wear
his hair any way he wants to. -Roxy
Dear Roxy: I am trying to decide which color to paint my Shoyru! I
would really like Baby, how much do you like that? -Miss Thinking-Of-A-Baby-Paint-Brush
Dear Miss Thinking-Of-A-Baby-Paint-Brush: Baby Paint Brushes are
a total expensive fad. If you can afford it, why not join in on the fad? The
problem with fads is they fade away and something comes to replace it. If you
want to spend the Neopoints and after the fad fades still have your Shoyru looking
immature, then you should paint it Baby. If not, then paint them Striped; it's
the best color! -Roxy
Dear Roxy: I was looking for back to school supplies for my pet.
I really liked an Aisha encyclopedia. Will my Zafara like the Aisha encyclopedia
or will I have to search for a Zafara encyclopedia? -Confused Shopper
Dear Confused Shopper: Most pets like reading about the other species,
so I don't see why your Zafara wouldn't like to learn about Aishas. I must say
that Aishas are quite interesting, but not as interesting as Shoyrus. Go do
your pet a favor and save up for a Shoyru encyclopedia, it's quite a good read.
-Roxy
Dear Roxy: What's the deal with 'may the borovan be with you'?
-What's the Deal
Dear What's the Deal: It's a saying I like to use. It has no connection
to a certain person; it is related to the actual drink. -Roxy
Other articles in which I offer my advice are Dear Roxy (Issue #105) and
Roxy Writes Her Advice (Issue #107.) You can check them out to see what other
complicated problems I've solved. -Roxy
To submit your question/problem to be answered by Roxy, simply send a Neomail
to roxycaligirl101. All messages must be appropriate with proper spelling and
grammar. Please put the subject as "Dear Roxy." Inappropriate, tasteless, and
repeated messages will be deleted, so please don’t waste your and my time. Due
to an overwhelming amount of messages, not all of them can be answered by Roxy.
All messages are subjected to editing.
Author’s Note: Take Roxy's advice at your own risk, you've been warned!
Thanks to all who submitted their problems. May the Borovan be with you!
| 
