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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 12th day of Swimming, Yr 22
The Neopian Times Week 103 > Articles > The Most Peculiar Things in Neopia: The Muffin Man… and Grundo Chef?

The Most Peculiar Things in Neopia: The Muffin Man… and Grundo Chef?

by onda_bianca

GRUNDOS - One of the most peculiar things in Neopia concerns the Grundo Chef, but ultimately, the Muffin Man. These days, Neopians don’t hear a lot about the Muffin Man, however it appears as though the Muffin Man once existed in Neopia. There are various items in Neopia left to prove it including the hat, gloves, and apron of the Muffin Man. If these items exist, I then am led to confusion, who is this Muffin Man? Does he still exist and could he possibly be linked to something else in Neopia, perhaps…the Grundo Chef?

In order to answer these questions, it is first necessary to examine what the Muffin Man once was. The Muffin Man must have been a man made out of muffin (hence the name, “Muffin Man”). His main purpose was to spread the joy of muffins all across Neopia. He did this by creating many wonderful muffins and being sure that they were abundant and ready for all to enjoy. This included inexpensive muffins like the Sutek Muffins that could be bought relatively cheap, a Valentines Muffin that helps Neopians associate muffin with love, some butterlicious muffins so others can associate muffins with great things, some battle muffins so those who liked to fight could associate muffins with their passion, as well as some very expensive muffins for the wealthy. The Muffin Man wanted muffins to be something that everyone of all ages, personalities, and economic class could enjoy. He envisioned the whole world of Neopia as a happy place only if it were filled with muffins. He was single-handedly going to make Neopia a better place, one muffin at a time.

In order to help him achieve his goals, the Muffin Man wore a special apron, gloves, and a hat. These articles of clothing helped him in his mission. His apron protected him from all evil muffins and those trying to destroy (or, um, eat) the Muffin Man. His gloves and hat both produced a large amount of muffins that somehow made their way across Neopia.

Over time, however, the Muffin Man was reduced to a story about a character with great Battledome items. The Muffin Man is, however, more than just a Battledome weapon maker. In fact, he never had anything to do with the Battledome. His sole purpose was to create and spread muffins everywhere.

It appears as though the Muffin Man disappeared, but somehow, muffins were still being made and muffin man Battledome items were still in use. This is when I realized there was more to the Muffin Man than a few Battledome items. This is when I realized that somebody was still carrying out the work of the Muffin Man. This is when I figured out that he might very well still exist, only in a different form.

I am proposing that the Muffin Man not only took the form of something else, but that he created a new identity for himself. I believe the Muffin Man to be Gargarox Isafuhlarg, the Grundo Chef. It makes perfect sense! Who else would make muffins, thus ensuring Neopia would be filled with them? What a perfect disguise for the Muffin Man!

First, take into account the Grundo Chef’s appearance. Okay, so he’s a large green Grundo, but look a little deeper. First, notice he is wearing an apron, very similar to that of the muffin man. Next, you will his hands are abnormal large. I believe this is because there are flesh-camouflage gloves, similar to that of the original Muffin Man. Next, you would ask about the hat. Well, seeing that this is a Grundo, the antennas would double as the hat. The hat was used to produce muffins, but what if each antenna rapidly produced muffins? This would be twice the production of the original hat, creating a more efficient Muffin Man. Perhaps this is one of the reasons why the Muffin Man decided to take the form of a large green Grundo.

Of course, there are other similarities between the Muffin Man and the Grundo Chef. If you look at the Grundo Chef, you would see that, apart from being green, he looks very much like he is a muffin. His head is shaped like the top of a muffin, his eyes look as though they are the fruit, berry, or vegetable that is part of the muffin, and his body has the texture and shape of a muffin.

While it can now be said that the Grundo Chef is shaped like a muffin, you may be wondering why he is green. Muffins aren’t green, or are they? Have you ever actually seen the Muffin Man? The Muffin Man may very well be green! Perhaps he is an asparagus flavored muffin, and we all know that asparagus is green! In fact, it makes perfect sense. All across Neopia, asparagus seems to be the vegetable of choice. Anything that is special or has any meaning at all is somehow related to asparagus. Of course, we must rationalize that the Muffin Man is one of the most special things about Neopia. So, one must then conclude that the Muffin Man was, in fact, made out of asparagus muffin mix, therefore, he would be green. When the Muffin Man became the Grundo Chef in disguise, the green automatically transferred over. Therefore, we can now say that the Grundo Chef and Muffin Man look almost identical. Coincidence? I think not.

If you are still not convinced with all this physical evidence, we can still examine the situation further. Everyone knows that the Grundo Chef cooks up some strange concoctions. He is known for mixing up weird ingredients to make some very inedible things that he likes to call food.

Of course, there is a method to this madness. If the Grundo Chef is really the Muffin Man, then he would not want others eating all his muffins before he can release them out into Neopia. If you remember correctly, the Muffin Man wants to spread the joy of muffins everywhere, but he can’t spread anything if it’s eaten first. The Muffin Man is a very intelligent and clever man. He knew this and came up with a strategy. If he led everyone to believe that he only made yucky things to keep them away from his food. This gave him plenty of time to make and distribute his muffins without the risk of them being eaten, thus continuing his success as the great Muffin Man that he is!

Now some of you may think I’m crazy, but where else do you think all these new muffins are coming from? And who else has the ability to make muffins other than a chef? It’s the perfect plan from the perfect muffin mastermind! Peculiar? Most definitely! Which makes this story even more believable, after all, only the most peculiar things happen here in Neopia!


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