|
BEAUTY CONTEST - There is something sinister going on in the Beauty Contest. And
if there's something shady going on Neopia, you can bet I'll be a part of it.
I mean... I'll be a part of getting the bottom of what is going on. So hold onto
your Meerca propeller hats because I am about to uncover the biggest robbery in
the history of Neopia -- "The Great Beauty Contest Pic Heist"! I'm not talking
about people "borrowing" pictures from other people to use in the Beauty Contest.
I am talking about real-live-actually-disappearing off-the-face-of-Neopia art
theft!
I first noticed that pics were disappearing from the Beauty Contest about
five weeks ago. A 10 year-old friend of mine had entered her pet into the contest
and arm-wrestled me for my vote. I lost. But the day after I voted, I went back
to see how she was doing out of sheer boredom. I noticed that two pets that
had been above her on the vote board had vanished without a trace. I was stunned.
My first instinct was to report this crime to the proper authorities. I wrote
an e-mail to ChiaPoliceStation@NeopiaCentral@Neopets.com and got this reply
back:
"Dear Very Concerned Neopian Citizen;
Thank you so much for bring this matter to our attention. We really appreciate
you alerting us to this serious problem. If you had not written to us, we would
never have known that you are a total idiot and you need to be avoided at all
costs. Do not bother us again or you will be squashed like a Grakle Bug and
turned into Dung Jelly. Have a nice day."
Although it seemed to be a very friendly response, I had a sneaking suspicion
that the Chia police were busy trying to solve important mysteries like who
was wearing the blue grass skirt at the Gadgadsbogen Festival, and wouldn't
be investigating this Beauty Contest thing any time soon. So I knew that it
fell to me, as a concerned Neopian Grakle Bug Dung Jelly, to track down these
nefarious art thieves. So, fearlessly and without regard to safety, knowing
that there were evil, desperate characters involved, I sent someone ELSE undercover
into the Beauty Contest. My Krawk.
After a week of watching the Beauty Contest like a hawk-eyed Eyrie, my Krawk
found out who the art thieves were. Invisible Neopets. I always wondered what
in Neopia would possess anyone to paint a pet with an invisible paint brush
and now I know. They do it so they can do sneaky things all over Neopian without
anyone noticing. Of course, since they are invisible they are probably jealous
of all the others Neopets who are lucky to have a decent picture drawn of themselves.
Invisible pets rarely have decent pics of themselves in the Beauty Contest.
So this is some sort of a revenge scheme. The art thieves wait until you are
busy doing something else and then snatch your pic out of the Beauty Contest
so your pet can't getting any votes. If your pet can't get any votes because
there is no picture to vote on, your pet can't win. Isn't that the most sinister
thing you ever heard of?
Of course, I never actually SAW them steal any Beauty Contest pics, being
invisible and all, but I know when they do it. So at least I can tell you when
they do it so you can protect yourself.
They steal your pic when you're occupied on the chat boards.
These sneaky see-through guys wait until you're posting on every other conceivable
Neopets chat board BESIDES the Beauty Contest board. They figure you're so busy
dodging angry messages and monitor warnings about begging for Beauty Contest
votes on the wrong board, that this is a great time to zip in and steal your
Beauty Contest pic. So the best way to totally throw off these pixel purloiners
is to actually post all of your Beauty Contest messages on the Beauty Contest
board and nowhere else. Since this is a totally radical approach, the thieves
will be confused into thinking you are setting them up to trap them and leave
you alone.
I guess these invisible pets are not only jealous of all the spiffy-looking
pets in the Beauty Contest, but they seem to be jealous of their friends too.
It must be really hard for invisible pets to make friends. So if your friends
are also posting messages on the chat boards asking people to vote for YOUR
pet, even if it is the Beauty Contest board, the vaporous vandals will get really
mad that you have so many nice friends and steal your Beauty Contest pic out
of spite. So my advice is to tell your friends to stay away from the chat boards
and not post messages about your pet being in the Beauty Contest so that the
art thieves won't know that you even have friends.
They steal your pic when you're occupied trading votes.
The art of stealing a pic out of the Beauty Contest so that it no longer even
exists, rests on perfect timing. The GIF grabbers and JPEG hijackers wait until
you're off in another account to do their dirty deed. One of the ways they know
you're not around to guard your Beauty Contest pic is when they see you offering
to trade a couple of votes for one kind of species. In order for you to trade
more than one vote per species, it means you have to have more than one account.
The thieves know that means you will have to go hopping around to other accounts
in order to trade more than one vote per species. That's when they steal your
pet's picture. A great way to protect yourself from pic snatchers is to simply
stay where you are and not trade more than one vote per species. Invisible robbers
really hate it when people do unpredictable stuff like that.
They steal your pic when you're occupied trading other stuff.
The moment you offer to trade someone a codestone or a Faerie or something
else for a Beauty Contest vote, the foggy filchers know you're going to be digging
around your safety deposit box for awhile. That's when they rush in faster than
a Cybunny with his tail on fire to steal your picture. I guess they are not
only jealous that your Neopet has a cool pic and lots of friends, but they are
jealous that you have a lot of stuff to give away too. So don't give anything
away for a vote. Not only does this keep the thieves from knowing you're busy
in your safety deposit box, but it keeps them from knowing all the neat stuff
you have too.
This is also a good reason not to post messages on items you have in the Trading
Post advertising your pet's Beauty Contest entry. Descriptions like, "My
Ixi is sooooooo cwute! Pwease vote for her! Huggles!" on a wet snowball
or something in the Trading Post sends the art robbers the same sort of "I'm
busy elsewhere and I have lots of stuff" kind of message. If you only advertise
in your guild or on the Beauty Contest chat board, there is a good chance the
art thieves will pick on somebody else. That's a real bonus for you. If they
steal somebody else's artwork, you have less competition. Cool, huh?
They steal your pic when you're occupied in your Neomail.
Because these art thieves are painted with an invisible paint brush, I guess
it's easy for them to slip a spy into the Neomail Post office. For some reason,
if you send someone ONE Neomail asking them to vote for your Neopet, the BC
bandits don't spot you in your Neomail. But if you keep sending the same person
a vote-begging Neomail over and over again, the Neomail spy-thieves somehow
notice you're really busy and trot off to take your picture.
Another way they seem to know when you're busy in your Neomail, is if you
unintentionally intimidate other Beauty Contest contestants. You know, saying
teasing stuff like, "If you don't withdraw your pet, I'm going to make up
lies about you and report you!" Or if you try very energetically to convince
people to vote for your pet by sending Neomail like, "If you don't vote for
my pet, I'm going to hack into your account and put all of your pets in the
pound!"
I'm not sure why the art thieves notice these kinds of Neomail more than any
other kinds, but they just do. So until I can figure out why, maybe it would
be safer if you Neomail everyone in Neopia just ONCE asking for a vote and try
to keep it friendly.
They steal your pic if your pic is way too awesome for words.
The art thieves seem to like really amazing pictures. They will steal certain
pictures just because they like them so much they can't live without them. Or
maybe they are just plain envious of your superb drawing skills. There are several
types of pictures they can't seem to keep their invisible paws off of:
They like anthro pics. If you aren't sure what that means, anthro pics are
pets that are drawn to look very human. But they don't like just any old kind
of anthro pics. GIF grabbers like the ones that not only look human, but either
have no clothes on or the clothes they do have on don't really seem to cover
anything.
They like party pics. Being shady creatures without morals, the art thieves
seem to really enjoy pictures that are shady and immoral too. If your Beauty
Contest pic just happens to have a bit of alcohol, drugs, blood gushing everywhere,
pets... ummm... petting... or anything else you might expect to see in an adult-oriented
movie, there's a VERY good chance that the invisible pic pirates will like it
so much they can't resist taking it.
They like popular pics. The ones they really really like are the ones that
appear on another person's petpage or user lookup but you have borrowed for
your Beauty Contest entry. They especially like the pics that are borrowed from
the Art Gallery.
They like custom pics. The moment the art thieves realize that you have paid
someone to do your picture for you, they haul your pic off to their own little
private invisible gallery.
They like mystery pics. They think the pictures that are in the wrong species
category are extremely funny. For example, if your pet is a Techo and you have
a Beauty Contest pic of your pet as a Koi, your pic will probably be the first
one the art thieves grab.
I guess the only way to slow down these pic snatchers is to not zap your Neopet
with the Lab Ray just before or during the Beauty Contest. Drawing your own
pic instead of borrowing one or paying someone for a pic seems to help keep
your Beauty Contest entry from disappearing too. And it definitely helps if
the pic you make is not too human, or at least not too graphically human.
I wish I could be of more help to all of you future Beauty Contest entrants.
Unfortunately, these sinister art thieves are too tricky, not to mention too
invisible, for the Chia Police and the Defenders of Neopia to bring to justice.
So for the time being we just have to be on our guard and take the proper precautions
to keep these evil fiends from stealing pics from the Beauty Contest. But at
least we know they are out there, lurking in the shadows, ready to pounce on
innocent, unsuspecting BC contestants. Which is probably why my Krawk is no
longer speaking to me.
| 
