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Neopia's Fill in the Blank News Source | 24th day of Eating, Yr 21
The Neopian Times Week 98 > Articles > The Paperclip Show -- Episode 2

The Paperclip Show -- Episode 2

by karateetee

Keet: Welcome back to The Paperclip Show, the show where our two horribly menacing hosts kidnap famous Neopian characters and coerce them into spitting their most guarded secrets!

Keet and Sam: MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Keet: Well, it's good to know that we didn't frighten everyone off with last week's dancing Branston episode!

Sam: Heck, it nearly scared me off. Anyway, as we promised, this week we're taking your questions for the one... the only... FYORA! *gestures offstage*

Nothing happens. Crickets chirp.

Sam: Or maybe we aren't...

Keet: No, here they come. *points*

The Faerie Queen appears onstage holding a cloud Gelert by the scruff of its neck.

Fyora: I already told you I would be here. There was no need to send this along to "kidnap" me.

Sam: Had to. It's an essential part of the show.

Keet: Eeeeeessential.

Fyora: *raises eyebrow* I see. And how essential was it for him to bring back a bag of Battle Dung with him? A bag, I might add, that he did not pay for.

Sam: Well...*twiddles fingers*

Fyora: As punishment, I am banishing him to the Lost Desert for two weeks. *waves hand and the Gelert disappears*

Keet: O.O THAT WAS MY PET!

Sam: Pooooor Meg. Oh well! Let's get on with the show. The first question if you will, Keet.

Keet: My-my-my...

Sam: Okay, I'll do the first question then. Snakebitesally7 asks, "I know that your tower is invisible, but are the things inside invisible as well? Or do they just appear to hang in thin air to passerbys?"

Fyora: Ah, a funny story that is. You see--

Keet: My-my-my--

Sam: Quiet when her Queen-ness is speaking! *thwacks Keet with a rolled up Issue 3*

Fyora: As I was saying, it's quite a funny story. You see, back when I first opened the Tower, the structure was the only thing visible. The objects appeared to be hanging in the air as you said. I put off performing a spell to make everything in the Tower invisible as well because I enjoyed seeing people jumping up and down from a hundred feet below trying to grab items.

Keet: Niiice. Sounds like something I would do.

Fyora: Indeed. Well, that all changed one day when I had Taelia --the Snow Faerie, you know -- over for tea. She also found the people below most amusing, but when she pointed out to me that I wear only skirts and dresses, I made it so that everything in the Tower is unable to be seen from the outside as well.

Sam: Ah. That must have been... embarrassing.

Fyora: Quite. For the next few weeks I had to banish several people to the desert for parading around with signs saying "Fyora wears pink tights!" And Jhudora has never let me hear the end of it since. But you know what I say? She lives on a purple and green cloud at the edge of Faerieland, and I live in a Palace. I think I still win.

Keet: Well... that was a most -- interesting story... next question! Janinekishi asks, "Why do you wear the same outfit every day?"

Sam: You know, she has a point. With all the profits from Hidden Tower artifacts, you should be able to have an extensive wardrobe. A new dress every day, even. *sighs dreamily*

Fyora: Oh you humans are so petty and materialistic.

Keet and Sam: Thanks! ^____^

Fyora: All profits from the Hidden Tower are donated to various charities around Neopia, including several that benefit abandoned pets in the Pound who no one wants to adopt.

Sam: That's so sweet!

Keet: True. But you should own at least one other dress, in case you spill something on the one you wear and you have to get it dry cleaned.

Fyora: Only humans are clumsy enough to spill things on themselves. No Faerie soils themselves in such manner of awkwardness.

Sam: Well la-de-da. Kitty_meow10 asks, "Can I have a baby paint brush?" *raises eyebrow*

Fyora: No. If I gave you one, I'd have to give everyone one. Which I could do, but I won't.

Keet: Why not?

Fyora: Because I said so.

Sam: Okee doke. Russianblue_47 asks, "Have you ever had plastic surgery?" o.O

Fyora: Actually, I have. Four cellulite burners, three tummy tucks, two face lifts--

Keet and Sam: AND A PARTRIDGE IN A PEAR TREE!

Fyora: 9.9;; Except that last one...

Keet: I'm surprised you admitted to all of that.

Fyora: Ah well, over the course of several thousand years, even the Faerie Queen needs a little tweak here and there.

Sam: Well, now that we're all sufficiently scarred, I think it's time for the final question of the show. Keet?

Keet: Okay, this one is from us. Why do Jhudora and Illusen hate each other so much?

Fyora: Hm, I'm surprised you two are the first to think to ask me. It's because--

A flaming clown runs past screaming. No one can hear Fyora's answer except the two hosts.

Fyora: --And that's why they hate each other so much!

Sam: Woah...

Keet: I never knew. *grin* And neither do our readers.

Sam: If we have any left.

Keet: Well, thanks to all those who sent in questions, not to mention Fyora here for spilling her secrets.

Sam: And Hika and Doodles, without whom this would not be possible!

Fyora: Oh what a shame that would be.

Keet: Shush. I think our guests enjoy the show far too much. Well, next week's guest is the Esophagor, so be sure to send in some really good questions for him!

Sam: And by good we mean terribly embarrassing!

Keet: Exactly. Bye!

Keet, Sam, and Fyora all wave as the lights fade out. When the light returns, they are gone.

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