It was a beautiful day on Mystery Island. The sun shone
brightly in the blue sky, bathing the entire island in its intense glow. The
sparkling ocean crashed against the damp sand, spraying the tall palm trees
and disturbing talkative birds along the beach. A slight breeze graced the day,
carrying the native’s laughter along with it. The entire scene appeared to be
a painting in motion. A shadow Kougra named Guenhwivaar, who resided on the
island, was determined not to waste the perfect day. A day like this meant no
hurricanes, and no hurricanes meant lots of napping time. And so, snuggled on
the couch, she napped.
“If I were in denial, would I be holding a jar
of pickled eyeballs? I don’t THINK SO!” screamed Flare, slamming down the phone.
Flare, a mystery island Uni, and Guen’s best friend, stood in Guen’s kitchen,
exasperated. Life would be so much easier if people just did what she said.
Guen, awakened by her friend’s outburst, groaned
loudly. Flare’s temper was usually worse than a Mystery Island hurricane. Deciding
it would be best to calm the Uni, she rolled off the couch and started toward
the kitchen, but before reaching the door she began to reconsider. A series
of screams, grunts, clangs, and sounds of random stuff crashing against random
stuff exploded from the kitchen into the living room. There could only be one
possible explanation. Flare was on a rampage. Gathering all her courage, and
her new honey potion, Guen raced into the kitchen.
“What in the world...” Guen muttered. To her
surprise, the kitchen was still intact, and Flare was busy with a screwdriver,
trying to fix the phone she had just destroyed. Guen, realizing the commotion
had come from the program on TV that Flare was watching, jumped on the counter,
stretched out her muscular, ebony legs, and prepared to take another nap.
“Uh, something happened to your phone, Guen,”
Flare murmured, embarrassed.
“Oh, yeah,” Guen replied sarcastically. “I noticed.”
Flare, deciding there was no hope for the broken
phone, sat down and continued to watch TV.
“What are you watching?” asked Guen.
“Oh, nothing really,” answered Flare. “Just the
greatest show in the entire WORLD! It’s called Kickin’ Chickens!”
Guen rolled her amber eyes. Kickin’ Chickens
was a ridiculous show involving chickens fighting each other while wielding
souped-up kitchen appliances. Humans and Neopets alike would spend countless
hours (not to mention thousands of Neopoints) combining blenders, toasters,
and other kitchen items to make the coolest weapon. Then they would buy a chicken
and train it to fight using the device. Most of the chickens didn’t care about
the fight though, and when they saw the tasty chicken feed in the middle of
the Arena, they dropped their weapons and flew to the feast. Then their owners
would control the weapons themselves with a remote and fight each other. Not
violent fighting, of course. Not when two innocent chickens were at risk in
the middle of the arena. This show was sponsored by “You’re Just Gonna Flip
When You Hear This!”, Neopia’s lamest tabloid. Flare loved the magazine and
read every issue. Guen, on the other hand, hated the magazine because Flare
would get some crazy idea from it and drag her along.
“Oh, oh!” shrieked a fire Ixi on the TV. She
was obviously the host of the stupid show. “Look at that! Marvelous Micro Menace
has just destroyed Blender Blunder Buster! I can’t believe it! I’m gonna faint!”
“Wow,” muttered the unenthusiastic cloud Skeith
at the Ixi’s side. “Amazing.”
“That’s it!” the excited Ixi shouted. “What an
ending, what an annihilation! I can’t believe it! Tune in next-” Flare switched
off the TV.
“Thanks,” said Guen. “I couldn’t take it anymore,
that show is so stupid I...” Guen’s voiced trailed off when she noticed the
scheming look in the Uni’s eyes. She knew that look, it was the "OK, Guen,
I’m going to ruin your life now" look. The Kougra began to sweat, she knew
she had to stop her friend from voicing her idea, and stop her from acting on
it. If she didn’t and Flare got what she wanted, Guen’s life would end up on
the front page of “You’re Just Gonna Flip When You Hear This!”.
“No,” she said sternly. “I’m not watching any
more TV today. It rots brains.”
“What?” asked Flare, very annoyed. “'Rots brains?'
I wasn’t even talking about watching TV. Look at this!” Flare shoved her copy
of “You’re Just Gonna Flip When You Hear This!” in Guen’s face. “It says the
Kickin’ Chickens staff is going to be on Mystery Island next week. They will
be filming the next two weeks of the show right here! And anyone from Mystery
Island can enter if they have a chicken and a homemade kitchen weapon! So what
do you say? Want to help me make a weapon? There is a 100,000 Neopoint prize
for 1st place!”
“Oh,” muttered the Kougra. “That’s what you were
talking about? Sure, whatever, I don’t care. That shouldn’t rot brains.”
“OK, cool!” exclaimed Flare. “Now, here’s the
plan. We are going to make our machine out of a stove, a set of butter knives,
a wok, and some ice tongs.”
“What?” argued the Kougra, “Do you have the slightest
idea what you’re doing? Let’s include a coffee maker instead of the stove! Coffee
makers are all the rage! When our chicken gets drowsy from all the fighting,
she can brew up some instant energy. No one can beat a caffeinated chicken!”
“That’s just weird, okay?” replied Flare. “How
about this? You go find us a chicken, and I’ll gather all the cool-looking appliances
from your kitchen, take them out to the garage, and start on the blue prints.
Then, when you get back, you can start screaming at me again. Okay?”
“Sounds good,” replied Guen. “Where do I find
“I have no idea,” said Flare.
“That helps. See you later,” muttered Guen as
she left the NeoHome.
After four hours of searching through various
shops for a chicken, Guen decided to ask the Shop Wizard for help. She approached
the sandy colored Jubjub, admiring his fancy robes and pointy hat.
“Alakazam!” shouted the Shop Wizard. “I’m your
friendly guide to online comparison shopping!”
“Can you help me find a chicken?” asked Guen.
“Sure!” replied the excited Jubjub. “Just give
me a second.” The Shop Wizard began his search for chicken as Guen waited patiently.
“Alakazam!” he yelled when the search was completed. “Which chicken item would
you like? I found a Chickentastic Ice Lolly, Rest In Peace of Chicken, Spicy
“No,” interrupted Guen. “I just want a chicken.”
The Shop Wizard looked at her curiously. “You know,” explained Guen, “a live
chicken? Bawk-bawk? One that hasn’t been cooked? Bawk-bawk?”
“Who’s there?!” joked the Jubjub. “Hahaha, I’m
hilarious. There aren’t any chickens like that in Neopia.”
“What?” asked Guen. “If there aren’t any chickens
in Neopia, then how do we get Chickentastic Ice Lollies, Mr. Pointyhat?”
A look of panic crossed the Jubjub’s fluffy face.
He pulled Guen’s dark head close to his, “Listen, there’s no need to make a
big deal out of this,” he whispered, glancing around suspiciously. “We don’t
want to get the Chickentastic company in trouble, now do we? No, of course we
don’t. How about I give you this,” he pulled a Peadackle from one of the folds
in his robe, “and we’ll just forget all about this little conversation?”
“Why are you giving this to me?” asked Guen,
The Shop Wizard laughed nervously. “Let’s just
call it a hush-Peadackle, shall we?” he muttered. “Now get out of here.”
Guen studied the Peadackle for a moment. She
knew Peadackles were aquatic Petpets and that they preferred to live in water,
but she wasn’t sure how they fared on land.
“Hey, girl,” Guen purred to the Peadackle. “Want
to come out of your bowl for a little while?”
“Bloop!” replied the Petpet. Guen, taking that
as a yes, scooped up the Petpet and set it between her shadowy shoulders.
“Bloop, bloop!” squealed the Peadackle, obviously
delighted. Confident the Peadackle would be okay out of her bowl, Guen started
Although Guen’s home was just a short trip from
the Shop Wizard, it was quite humid outside, and by the time Guen got to her
house the Peadackle appeared to be wilting. Guen raced into the kitchen, pulled
the biggest bowl she owned from the cabinet and filled it with fresh water.
Once the Peadackle was inside the cozy bowl, Guen decided to get a Neocola and
relax. Normally there was a large supply of Neocola inside of the refrigerator,
but Guen’s life was anything but normal.
“What happened to my refrigerator?” Guen asked
aloud. “And where’s my toaster?”
Almost every single kitchen appliance was missing
and Guen realized Flare must have taken them out to the garage. “I didn’t think
Flare was going to use everything I own,” she muttered, picking up the Peadackle
and heading toward the garage. “Oh, well, at least Flare took the coffee maker.”
Guen found Flare lying on the garage floor, exhausted.
Sweat dripped from the island Uni’s beautifully patterned head, and she was
covered in flecks of metal and paint. Guen also noticed a huge, odd-looking
“Flare?” asked Guen, trying to hide her disappointment.
“I thought we were going to build a machine together. Why- wait a second...
how did you manage to build that in four hours?”
Flare, ignoring the Kougra’s questions, jumped
to her hooves and ran to the machine. “Look at it, Guen!” she exclaimed. “Isn’t
it beautiful? I call it Ultra-Chilling-Fire-Breathing-Coffee-Brewing-Annihilation-Madness...
3000! I used the stove, the coffee maker, the wok, and a secret appliance! Can
you guess what it is?”
To be continued...