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Editor's Note: This poetry gallery would've gone up earlier, but... eh... *shrugs* I lacked interest. ;)
The Phenomenon of a Nonexistent Day
in a puff of smoke:
a grand vanishing act
by a magician
with a silver hat.
hidden by a storm
like Lutari Island
mayhap or just
fallen from the sky
and left behind just
a very faint grey mark,
a shadowy imprint
where it wasn't quite
erased all the way.
and, funny thing, but
all the folks I spoke with
didn't even have a clue;
they all asked,
"What's March third?"
The Third of Third
That lapse between
reluctant-to-ebb winter and yawning,
groggy spring, that half-step
frozen in air uncertain:
no wonder there is naught
but lack of interest,
and one could say a lack of something
isn't anything at all.
With summer's warmth
far and untouchable along the horizon,
with the moment of first snow
(now you just want the stuff gone),
with the daffodils
yet to open at the same time...
I don't blame you.
The third of third,
three days into three-twelfths --
that day to
give it all up, stop all
pretence of caring;
yet when the sun's gone and set
and you've successfully
done and cared for nothing,
you miss the cobbles of
Neopia Central after all, the
bustle of the Catacombs, and
then will the first petals blossom.
Due to Lack of Interest
Tell me, is it true?
This rumour that I've heard?
Are you really thinking of cancelling me?
Me again? March the third?
I hear it's due to lack of interest,
But I hope that you can wait --
If you only got to know me,
I'm quite a fascinating date!
Did you know it was on my date in Year 3
Nimmos could first be painted gold?
That Dr. Sloth joined the Neopedia?
What? You want something more bold?
Well, how about in Year 4,
I not only hosted Uni Day,
But it was on March the third of that year
That the first Poetry Gallery got underway.
I hosted news and updates in Year 5 --
It was on that day that Dragoyles were released --
Yet it was the very next year
That my date simply... ceased.
Each year since then I've sat and waited,
Filling my square in the calendar,
And each year since then I have been cancelled,
Watch as you skip on to the fourth.
It has actually become quite dull to me,
This cancellation that you do,
Perhaps due to lack of interest,
This year I will cancel you.
Title Cancelled Due to Lack of Interest
I have awful writer's block today.
I think Meepits stole my thoughts away.
Absolutely nothing rhymes with Gelert,
So I've made up a nonsense word: Zelert.
Maybe this problem will be through
When I tell my unfortunate story to you.
I woke up with a 404 error in my brain.
Thinking at all gave me terrible pain.
So I gave up quickly and went back to bed,
Figuring rest would cure my aching head.
Next thing I know, it's a quarter to two,
And I still had some writing to do!
I quickly grabbed some paper and a pen
And tried to find my inner writing zen.
But poetry seemed as confusing as HTML code.
When I tried to use imagery, it wouldn't load.
My imagination is a screen of deathly blue,
And it will not reboot no matter what I do!
My story is done and I'm not better yet.
I will probably be this way until tomorrow, I bet.
I'm boring myself so I'm sure I'm boring you,
So this poem is cancelled and the rest of the day too!
Look Away! There's Nothing to Look at Here
I dare ask, what are you doing?
Hm, reading this poem, you say?
That answer is quite troubling,
especially today of all days.
Indeed troubling it is,
For this poem you claim to read
Simply doth not exist!
Go on, move onto another deed.
Persistent I see and also mad,
Surely mad you must be!
And don't dare disagree,
For you see what others can't see.
Make your case all you want,
But how could there be a poem today,
March third of all days?
Yes, everything's cancelled, I say!
Cancelled Due to Lack of Clubs
It's a boring day down in Altador.
My need for a hobby is rising.
Let's head down to the Altador Archives
and see what clubs are advertising.
Oh, look here! A mining club
Digging down in the quarry all day,
Exploring the earth for the values within,
Cataloguing the rare finds that we survey.
Oh, wait, cancelled due to lack of interest.
OK, well here, the engineering club!
Building contraptions and learning the crafts,
Finding out what makes things tick by
Working with motors, gears, and camshafts.
Ugh, what? Cancelled due to lack of interest?
Huff and pout, OK, moving on
An herbalism club! Working with plants!
Classifying flora and finding its uses,
Cooking, displaying and making enchants.
Oh, come on! Cancelled due to lack of interest!
This is getting silly now, but try again.
An alchemy club, brewing new potions,
So many things we could discover
Creating essences, drinks, and lotions.
Cancelled due to lack of interest, figures.
A dance club, that has to be popular!
Grooving and moving, shake and shout.
The lights, the music, the pounding beat --
There's no way this club could have a drought!
Cancelled due to lack of interest...
The last sign on the list, the astronomy club,
Charting the planets, suns, and stars,
Staring up at the night sky in awe
Of the celestial worlds that aren't ours...
Canceled due to lack of constellations.
I give up.
but I'm afraid that
that poem you ordered
last week? it's been
until further notice,
partly because of
the general lack
of public interest in
almost entirely because
it's March 3rd.
but isn't it strange? how
one day, Neopia
grinds to a halt?
how, on March 3rd,
we Neopets stop working and
poems certainly can't
write themselves. so
someone really should
maybe the faeries could?
teach them how to write
themselves, I mean.
It makes the younglings wonder, curious,
As to that ancient holiday
That exists no more today.
What monstrosity of a day, they muse
Must be such a disaster,
So unappealing, unwanted, unloved,
That the higher-ups had no choice,
But simply to cancel?
What could it be, in the
Month of Awakening, in so many years past?
Perchance a day to celebrate
The start of the newest season -- (a bit early, eh?)
Or maybe someone's birthday,
Someone that nobody likes? (Poor soul!)
Or maybe even because Uni Day,
Celebrating the most vain of creatures,
Was just the day before,
And of course, they throw great parties,
Exhausting all the party animals, and they overslept.
Makes sense wouldn't it?
For then it would be lumped with the previous day,
almost as if Uni Day lasted two days,
and the next was duly cancelled.
Either way, an insult occurs, and the younglings wonder.
Or most likely, the younglings decide, bored,
And brains hurting from hypothesising,
That day was simply --
This Poem Has Been Cancelled for Lack of Interest. Really.
This poem has been cancelled for lack of interest.
No really, I mean it, go away,
No rhyming will go on here, by this I swear,
Nope. Nada. No how. Not today.
What's wrong, you ask? Oh, you don't know?
To be honest, I just simply don't care,
Poetry writing is so 'Year Three,'
And I need to go wash my hair,
So if you'd mind, stop reading now,
This poem has got to stop,
And even if I did attempt to rhyme,
It would be a massive flop!
I did intend to write, you see,
A massive poem, four pages long,
But as time passed, I realised the drag,
And my inspiration had completely gone,
So maybe tomorrow, or maybe not,
But by now you should have guessed,
That my poetry writing is now no more,
This poem has been cancelled for lack of interest!
3rd of March
On this day,
Everything runs like clockwork.
Nothing seems to be out of the ordinary,
Yet under the surface, something is wrong.
Poems don't rhyme,
The pets stay in their Neohomes,
Staring out of the windows,
Fearful for something they cannot see.
An air of mystery hangs in the atmosphere.
What could this day be?
They said, today's event was cancelled.
But was it due to lack of interest,
Or something more?
Poor March 3rd,
it can come and go.
Nobody seems to care.
No one notices it's gone,
until March 4th has come along,
but of course by then it's too late.
Poor calendar date,
Hasn't a friend in the world.
Not a thing to celebrate at all.
Cancelled, everyone will say,
what an uneventful day.
And another March 3rd will have gone by.
This Poem Has Been Cancelled
This poem has been cancelled,
So go about your day.
Pay visit to your loving aunt,
Or head outside to play.
This poem has been cancelled,
It simply isn't here!
Search up and down to your content,
But it's flown the coop, I fear.
This poem has been cancelled;
I'm sorry but it's true.
Crying will not bring it back,
There's no sense looking blue.
This poem has been cancelled,
There's not much else to say.
Most everything is out of touch,
For it's March 3rd today!
In the Absence of Anything Interesting to Do
Shut all your windows,
Carefully lock up your doors,
And come sit with me.
Together we will
Slouch, moan, groan, complain,
And sip bland cocoa.
Just the two of us,
We shall sit in chairs and stare
Back at each other.
Tomorrow we shall
Celebrate nothing due to
Lack of interest.
We'll Never Know
What day is it today?
We'll never know
Whether they celebrated waffles
Or gave out free Neggs.
We'll never know if today was a day
When Virtupets annually blew up,
And then in the same day came back together,
Just for our amusement.
And we'll never know the unmade items
Put in the NC Mall each year
To celebrate this day
That we do not know.
We'll never know,
And we'll never wonder
Because this day
Was Cancelled Due to Lack of Interest.
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