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Commander Gormos's Plea
I'm not a hero. Please don't think
I'm soft in any way.
But now, in books of history's ink,
They say I saved the day.
A single second -- that was all.
I chose to let them go.
But now they say I planned Sloth's fall.
I want to tell them "no."
I'm not a hero. Don't give thanks;
I didn't set you free.
I still did serve within Sloth's ranks.
Your saviour isn't me.
The Grundos love me, say I'm great,
I'm called their champion.
Misunderstanding is my fate,
False lies, my mission.
I'm not a hero. Leave me be!
Don't throw me a parade.
I'm not the symbol that you see.
I didn't give you aid.
And now I'm shunned by friends I had;
They say I let them down.
So now I'm neither good nor bad;
A sad and tragic clown.
I'm not a hero. No, not I.
But now I must atone.
And so I sadly heave a sigh
And spend my days alone.
Ice Cream Dream
The first of his kind in an unknown land,
Far away from the place he calls home,
Stands Mr. Chipper behind his cart,
In the country where snow pets roam.
A blue Lutari with a white hat,
Umbrella protecting him from the sun,
He gives out ice cream to the pets,
But beware -- he does not serve everyone.
If you give him a blue coupon,
He will smile at you and take
Any ice cream from his blue cart --
It comes in more flavours than cake.
He accepts three different coupons
That come in blue, green, and pink;
You can get them from Taelia,
Who hands them over with a wink.
But beware those who do come
Without any coupon to show,
Mr. Chipper can get quite angry
And toss you into a wall of snow.
Should you have the coupon, though,
You can get fabulous ice cream --
Double chocolate, mint, or rainbow,
Everything you imagine in a dream.
Gargarox Isafuhlarg, Grundo Chef
The Grundo Chef has just two loves.
His first is Gormball's trials.
His second love is cooking, and
With food he's quite beguiled!
His beef concoctions take the cake!
His puddings gleam and shine.
His soups and stews are savoury.
I wish that they were mine!
His chicken cordon bleu is ripe
With sludge that glows bright green.
His manicotti's laced with cheese
And intergalactic beans!
His food's subjected to the best
Of flavour-amping rays.
His customers bombard his store
With orders and with trays!
So visit Gargarox if you
Can spare a bit of time!
He's shopkeeper on Virtupets,
Or Gormball's player nine!
The Discarded Magical Blue Grundo Plushie of Prosperity
He lies forsaken, silently
Forlorn for years on end.
His little plushie heart is sad;
He needs a loving friend.
Neopians, those passers-by,
They glance but never stay,
Sometimes they frown and sigh at him,
But then they go away.
His eyes, they plead, his face is glum,
Enough to make one weep!
He is so still, he is so small,
He utters not a peep.
Too long has he awaited hope,
The days just come and go,
Why has nobody picked him up?
His tale is one of woe.
The Blue Grundo Plushie is forever patient,
He waits through wind and rain,
He knows one day he will be found
And will be loved again.
Maybe you should talk to him;
He's old and limp and frayed!
No, don't be silly, he's just a toy!
He won't hear you anyway.
A Kiko Match
They line up in an even row,
Just two at first, they're starting slow.
Bright blue each Kiko's rotund shape,
Atop each head matched bandage tape.
Some more appear, first four, then eight.
You pair them up, don't hesitate!
Pink duo and dual set of green,
Yet more appear, ten, then sixteen.
The Kiko folk are swarming fast,
The seconds flying, ticking past.
Memory struggles, numbers grow,
You seek a match, search to and fro.
Alas, it's time that bids you ill,
If game's aim you can not fulfill.
Each Kiko matched with his own twin,
But beat the clock, or never win.
Each round brings colours not yet seen,
Or multiples of red and green.
As game wears on, each Kiko's face
Holds smirk or smug so firm in place.
Imagine that? It may be so,
But then, my friend, you never know!
Could Kikos seek to win the game?
(You lose, you'll find it's them you blame.)
Time's up, quick! Glance over there!
And hope like mad for Kiko pair!
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